A Tale Of A Broken Heart

Sore

"Do you want to get out of here for a minute ? I've always wanted to kiss a girl in a dress", I secretly texted Natalie.

Natalie and I went to our famous prom as friends.  She wore a fancy black dress and I a classic black suit. It was the first time for me seeing her in a real dress so needless to say I was pretty stunned by her appearance. She perfectly fitted into the extravagant decorations made by our talented art classes. 

She looked beautiful.

After I demonstrated my non-existent dancing skills, we and a few classmates sat down to take in the atmosphere.

"Maybe later", she texted back.

Kind of surprised by her message I looked over to her. She was admiring a card trick performance by Jack. Jack was in many ways the complete opposite of me. He was very good at sports, tall, popular, and even I have to admit, very handsome.

"Oh my god how did you do that ?", she looked at him amazed after he pulled off his trick. She was smiling. The same warm, heart melting, cute smile she had always gave me.

I'm usually not a very jealous person. But at that moment, I was boiling. It felt like someone stabbed me right in the heart. But at the same time I felt guilty because I had no right to feel like that.

"Hey guys lets go to the dance floor again!", one of our classmate interrupted my thought process.

As everybody slowly stood up and started to walk towards the music I held Natalie's hand and hinted her to wait.

"I kind of want to kiss Jack", she whispered while she looked at me with a cold gaze.

After those words her hand slipped through mine and she went on with the others. I was left there. Standing alone. 

My heart sank.

I found out later that she told me that with the intention to hurt me. I already knew that she didn't feel the same way about me as I did about her. But hearing those words so directly from her was still very crushing. At that time my feelings for her got to the point where it wasn't liking or having a crush anymore but instead, loving. I was in love with her.

But we were just friends.

Looking back I can't really blame her. Natalie is a year older and it showed. She was more mature than I. And who would want to be together with a child ? She wanted someone who she could be together with and not someone who has to be taken care of. But at the time I didn't understand it. I didn't understand the world. I was hurt. 

I was hurt like never before. 

I didn't stay very long after that. I couldn't bare the situation I was in and I just wanted to get out of there. I went home early with a sore heart.