What Goes Around [on hold]

Chapter 5 ~ She knew it

Twelve Years Earlier

Darcy Kendrick was the most popular, sexy, sporty, fun, talented, party-loving, boy-magnetic girl in all of Tayley-Cross Secondary School – and she knew it. She had the friends, the money, the boy, the house, and the life that every other teenage girl envied – and she knew it.

She also had power – and she definitely knew that.

Ian Taylor was a ugly. He smelled. He was a girl-repulser. He had a stutter. He wore glasses. He suffered from acne. He was freakishly tall for his age. He had a humongous nose. He was the only boy that took Domestic Science as a GCSE option, and even then he couldn’t cook to save his life. He had no friends. He had nobody, and he knew it.

Well, that’s not entirely true – he did have somebody – he had Darcy Kendrick all the way through his school life. She was constantly with him – if it wasn’t in person, it was in his thoughts. She remained in his thoughts every time he scraped the knife across the skin of his wrist, every time he sobbed, every time he lost control of his temper. She made his life hell. She, along with her friends and her boyfriend, drove him to suicidal point.

And she knew it.

                                                                                          ~*~

 Present Day

The loud and sudden scrape of Darcy’s chair broke the bitter silence at the table in the restaurant. She stood up with her coat in her hand and her jaw clenched.

“I’m not hungry.” she said robotically. Her words were met with a blank stare.

She then turned and walked slowly towards the door. A waiter there stepped forward and said, with a heavy Italian accent, “You are leaving so soon? The man was not satisfactory for you?” he asked with a wink. Darcy did not return his humour; just brushed passed him wordlessly on her way out.

Once in her car, she sat in the cold without turning the engine on, her breath visible in the icy air.

How could it be this cold in August?

The memories of Darcy’s teenage years were like a room; all fond and happy – some wild and rebellious, of course, but at least she had enjoyed herself. It was a room she could look into from time to time and explore some of the happiest moments of her entire life. It was a room in which all of her old best friends lived, even if she wasn’t in contact with them anymore – and here she could see them again; re-live the moments they’d shared.

However, in every room there are corners, and in these corners lie shadows, and this room was no different for Darcy. She could see the shadows for what they were; could acknowledge their wrong, but even so she avoided these corners and these shadows and preferred to stay in the light.

At the time that Darcy was being very nastily cruel to poor Ian Taylor, it was for fun. There was nothing wrong with it. To her, there were no shadows in her adolescence, while she was in it, at least. But, as she grew older; wiser – she saw that what she’d done was wrong, and had spent some time to specifically repent her actions; to specifically stand in those shadows, without anyone else knowing her remorse. But once she had finished feeling what she felt was a fair amount of shame and regret for the amount of wrong she had done, she resurfaced and stepped out from the shadows, resolving that she would never step into them again.

But now, she’d been thrown into them; battered against the corners and dunked in the darkness.

What really hit her was the irony. Was it not ironic how Becca chose him, of all people? Even her knowing him was a chance in a million! But what was it that made Becca think that Ian was the right guy for her?

And also, how he had changed! Darcy dared to think that perhaps, if he’d looked like that when she knew her before, she’d have seen him as boyfriend material, rather than prey. Then, she internally slapped herself for being such an obnoxious nasty little bitch when she was younger.

She really did hope she had changed, as she came to think of it. But, what was it like for him, seeing her after all these years, she wondered? She couldn’t even begin to imagine how much he must loathe her. She couldn’t blame him… but, she’d already gone over this with herself years before! She didn’t need to torture herself over times gone by! She didn’t need to stay in the shadows, even if she was thrown into them by mistake! She could just resurface again, like she always had.

But then, the lyrics of a song sprang to her mind.

“It’s unfortunate that when we feel a storm we can roll ourselves over 'cause we’re uncomfortable.”

Was this like avoiding an issue she really shouldn’t avoid? Was it… could it possibly be… fate? Karma?

No! – She was becoming silly now. Darcy didn’t believe in fate, or karma, or destiny, or anything like that. She didn’t ever have to see Ian again, so why should she waste her time over a forgotten past? She shouldn’t. She would step out from the shadows.

Darcy wondered how Becca was getting on with Katrina… or whether she’d walked out, too. Now that would be ironic.