Starting Over Again

Disappointment

JASMINE

I'm still hurt due to the lost of my baby but I don't wanna walk around moping and stressed out because I don't want to kill my other baby . Today is Justin's birthday and his grandfathers are flying in to celebrate with him .

"hey mom , when is grandpa Ralph getting here ?"

"what about your other grandpa ? you don't want him here ?"

"yea but I already talked to him . daddy went to get him from the airport"

"okay , well where do you want to go to eat ?"

"you already know !"

"Apple bees ?"

"Apple bees !"

I laughed . this boy is silly and yes he's starting to call us mommy and daddy . it was hard for him to get into the habit of doing it but he's got the hang of it now and it warms my heart every time he says it .

...

"GRANDPA !" Justin shouts running down the stairs . he must've been looking through his window waiting .

"hey buddy ! happy birthday , how old are ya now ? 20 ?"

"umm subtract 10" he's so smart

"ahh so 20 - 10 = ? hmmm"

"I'm 10 grandpa 10 ! this many !" he says holding up all of his fingers .

"that's right ! well you want $10 for that ?"

"no I want $20 old man , pay up !"

"alright alright"

Ring Ring Ring ! Ring Ring Ring ! I look down at my phone that was on the kitchen counter and saw Ralph calling me . I picked it up and answered .

"hello ?"

"hey there"

"where are you ? Justin is waiting to see you"

"uhh I'm sorry but I won't be able to make it . stuff popped up at 'work' that I gotta take care of"

"work ? are you stilling 'working' at the same place you've been since I was a kid ?"

"uhh yeaa you know it's kind of hard to get out this game . especially now it's to many enemies looking for me . they might just catch me slipping if I let my guards down"

"yea yea yea I don't want to hear that bullshit Ralph . Justin was so excited for you to be coming"

"he's still gonna have somebody there for him"

"but he wanted you here too . you always putting the game before your family I don't even know why I bothered to think that you would actually come around and change this time . if you'll excuse me I have to go disappoint my son telling him how your not coming" with that , I hung up . but I had a question sitting on my mind that I wanted to ask him . I decided to text him .

Jasmine : why did you take my mother off life support ? did you not care for her either ?

Ralph : I cared very much , that's why I did it . I didn't want her suffering .

Jasmine : there could've been a chance for her ! you killed her your the reason that I didn't get to say goodbye . your the reason that she got shot because you cared more about the game than your family . your a lame excuse for a man I HATE YOU !

I started to cry , I ran upstairs because I didn't want to upset Justin on his day . Marcus came in to comfort me .

"baby what's wrong ?"

"Ralph , he's not coming . he says something came up at his job and people are out to get him . he's always putting the game before his family and that's sad Marcus he better not contact me ever again trying to make amends . every time I let him back in my life he disappoints me and he not going to do that and walk in and out of my children life"

"it's going to be okay baby calm down" he runs his fingers through my hair as he kisses my forehead calming me down