Pervade and Faint

Chapter 31

The dim and soft rays of the sun had entered my room. The thin and light curtains allowed the rays of light to penetrate through them. Silhouettes of the furniture formed on the wall. There was a gentle breeze outside. But I didn't get a chance to feel it because my window was closed.
(For some inexplicable reason, windows are always closed for me).
Although, the weather wasn't suitable enough for the widow to remain open. It was cold outside. My winter attire was even out, just a few jackets and gloves.

I brushed my teeth, washed my face and descended the stairs. For just a second, my eyes widened when they met the clock. I'm late, I thought. But it wasn't much of a concern because dad and uncle Qurashi had left.

There was some food in the microwave, but I didn't eat, thinking that I would just eat at auntie Shama's place.

I enshrouded a bomber jacket over myself and went over to her house.

Inevitably, auntie Shama opened the door and greeted me.
"Woke up late?" she inquired and smiled.
"Yeah, I slept in", I replied and rubbed my eyes. There were still vestiges if sleep and fatigue in me, but only marginal.
"Did you eat?" she asked, as we entered the dining room.
"No", I blurted.
"I'll make breakfast for you", she offered. I looked into her eyes. There was a certain dismay in them.

I went into the backyard while she cooked. I sensed a strong feeling of déjà vu as I entered the backyard. It wasn't just because of the swing, but Sophia's absence on it. A tear of pain escaped from my eye and I stood there, in the state of utter desperation. The swing was still under that huge tree with refulgent, purple flowers. Jacaranda. I had still remembered the name of that tree. It was the tree under which Sophia used to sit. The tree which gave shade to the brightest thing in earth. The fragrance of the flowers suffused, but I could have sworn that the smell was not the same. However, the flowers were the same, but perceptibly aggravated. I realized that all of the charm was with Sophia. And even the fragrance of those flowers smelled abominable in her absence. I wondered how the flowers even managed to bloom in her absence. But nature has been, is, and shall always remain inevitable.

Auntie Shama joined me, with a tray, carefully held in her hands.
"I thought you left", she said, worried.
"No, I was just_", I said, but not a single word managed to come out of my mouth. I broke into tears. An unceasing rainfall started from my eyes.
I cried on the swing, with my face, buried in auntie Shama's arms.
"W _ why is this happening?" I asked and coughed. Why is this happening?

Neither one of us spoke after that. I ate on the swing. The food had an odd taste because of the salty tears, which lingered in my throat.

When I was finished with breakfast, auntie Shama put the tray to a side and held my hand.
"Ready?" she asked with a febrile expression in her face. I looked at the grass, the green and wet grass. All dull.
"Yes", said a small, uncertain voice from my inside. Auntie Shama looked at me, as in disbelief. Her eyes glued to mines, and they didn't leave for a whole minute.
Auntie Shama took a deep breath, exhaled, and lowered her eyes.
"She's not married."