Something Phenomenal

Phenomenal: Eleven

Day 20 out of hospital

It's Sunday. Mamala and I went to church early morning. Mamala's a religious person. She and my Lolo met a church mass when they were young.

I wonder what it's like meeting the love of your life and just knowing it's the person you'd spend your whole life with. Imagine the commitment and willingness to stay by one's side forever. Though forever wasn't given to them. Mamala's still here, my Lolo has been long gone.

I listen along the mass and watch the people praying, seeking comfort or peace in the place. What are they praying for? What are their hopes? It must have been a lot because of the way their shoulders shake while they're on their knees.

Whenever Mamala's done praying, her eyes would be red and teary and she would hug me tight as though I'm a big part of the things she tells God.

And there's part of the mass when you would confess your sins and ask for forgiveness. And that's mostly when I get emotional. Because I know I'm not worthy to ask things from Him.

So I pray for other people. I pray for my brother, my mother, and for Mamala. I pray for my Lolo who's already in heaven and pray that wherever Dad is, I hope he's well. I also pray for Shane and his family.

And then I pray for people with me in the church. I hope that He would hear them too, like the way He listens to me on my darkest times. I don't usually ask much. There are people who had it worse than me. So I ask for strength for me to keep going and the courage to face things, whatever they may be.

Matapos ang mass nakita namin si Shane at ng Dad niya sa labas ng church. I know they'd be here, namention ng pari ang pamilya Argueles sa thanksgiving.

Nagmano ako sa Dad ni Shane. He told me it's the first time he saw me in a long time and wish for my health to stay stable. Nag-usap sila ni Mamala sandali and Shane and I walked to the side near the church, watching people.

"You wanna go with me?" tanong ko.

"Saan ka nanaman tatakas?"

Nakahalukipkip ang braso niya habang nakasandal sa pader. He's looking pretty decent today, even wearing a gray polo shirt tucked at the elbows.

"There's a newly open coffee shop near the village. Gusto kong puntahan."

He sighed. "Sinasabi ko na nga ba pupuntahan mo 'yon."

I stepped in front of him and smiled my most angelic smile. After all, I'm wearing a dress today which Mamala insisted. It's close to being angelic right?

Sumimangot siya, the thing when one corner of his lips pull down displeasingly. But I know him too well to know na konting pangungulit pa, papayag din siya.

Nakauwi kami sa bahay matapos ang mass. Hinatid ni Shane ang Dad niya at isa pang kasama bago dumerecho sa'min. Pagdating niya, nakaabang na ako gamit ang bike ko.

Sumilip siya mula sa bintana ng nakaparada niyang sasakyan sa pavement. "Ano 'yan?"

"Ito gamitin natin, malapit lang naman. Angkas mo ako."

"Mabigat ka."

"Arte mo."

And that's the reason why Shane, wearing all decent attire was on my bike, and me, wearing a floral dress was sitting at the small carrier while he's biking across the golden fields of the back part of the village. Big fluffy clouds rolled low across the sky and October air was chilly even in mid-morning.

Tinaas ko ang isang kamay ko na tila inaabot ang langit habang ang isa ay nakahawak sa bewang ni Shane.

"Baka mahulog ka," he warned.

"I love the blueness of the sky," I whispered. "Don't you think it's the prettiest color?"

Bahagya siyang lumingon and I could make up the smile at the corner of his lips.

We parked the bike in front of the coffee shop. I had my camera and a notebook with me. It became a habit to bring this particular notebook with me.

The coffee shop was refreshing. It's full of green plants on the inside, and dark wooden chairs and tables. Also, those black rustic looking lamps hanging from the ceiling add to the ambiance.

"Tuwang tuwa ka nanaman," sabi ni Shane nang makitang nagniningning ang mga mata ko. Pretty coffee shops are my weakness.

Dumerecho kami sa counter kung saan nakalagay ang mga pastries at listahan ng mga inumin. I don't know what the cakes and breads are called but they all look scrumptious.

I took a picture and clips of almost everything. The plants, the exposed beams on the ceiling with the hanging lamps, the glass that contains the cakes and pastries and our orders, caffé latte for a change, and caffé americano for Shane.

"Happy?"

Tumango-tango ako habang tinitikman ang cheese cake nila.

"Buti nalang single ka no? Para may nahihila ako sa mga ganitong bagay."

Sumulyap siya sa'kin habang hinahalo ang kape niya. "Pwede mo naman ako sabihan. Darating ako."

I took a sip of my own coffee. "Shane."

He gave me a questioning gaze instead of answering.

"Gusto kong makita ang dagat. Matagal na akong hindi nakakapunta sa dagat."

"Malayo," sabi niya like it wasn't the obvious. We're like smack right in the middle of Luzon.

"Sasamahan mo naman ako, di ba?"

He must have noticed the earnest in my voice. "Syempre naman. Nakakahiya naman sa'yo."

Bumungisngis ako. Saka biglang may naalala. "Wait. Wala ako noong birthday mo."

It was my third month in the hospital and though he brought a piece of cake from his celebration, hindi ko siya masyadong nabati because I was under medication that time.

"Hindi ko gusto 'yang iniisip mo," babala niya.

But too late, I was already at the counter ordering a small blueberry cheesecake. And of course with a candle. Dinala ko ito sa table namin with the single blue candle lit.

"Happy birthday to you," kumanta ako. Shane was groaning on his chair, sliding lower and lower in embarrassment. Pero nakangiti siya at alam kong tahimik na tumatawa.

"Happy birthday to you." Maging ang mga customer sa shop nakikanta din. Shane was shaking his head pero hindi mapigilan ang ngiti niya nang hipan niya ang kandila.

We cheered. I took a picture of Shane and his cake. Shane was staring at me, and just like Mamala with her prayers I heard my name from Shane's wish.

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