verbatim. - cscoop

the joint.

she walked across the graduation platform with only one face in mind, he wasn't anywhere to see that his little girl did what she was told was impossible for her. all of her suspensions, low grades, and horrendous results brought her to completion. he wasn't here to see it.

i never thought i'd make it here. i was always told by my father that i can't do what makes me happy with a four year college education.

fear and uncertainty is the only thing i learned from him. they pranced around in my head as i threw my cap into the air and watched them all fly up. i tried to look for a friend or anyone to wait with, forgetting that all my friends dropped out to make music and stream full time. why was i the only one who made it? why me?

"watch where you're going."

a voice announced as i walked to my car, i looked back and a kid on a bmx bike looked back at me. i shrugged it off and got in my car before resting my head on the wheel. god i wanted to scream so loud. i wanted to scream bloody murder. i just bounced my head a few times off the wheel before rolling down my windows to let the sticky californian air flow. before i changed gears to leave a familiar face popped up in my left side view mirror.

"cooper!"

god am i actually going to see someone i know? crazy.

"iz, wait up."

he slowly jogged up to the rolled down window before flicking his hair out of his face and handing me a poorly rolled joint. was this shit like in his pocket? what the hell?

"you, iza, are the only person left to graduate in our friend group, besides me. of course. let's go to my place and celebrate, yeah? cool."

he was strange, but he always had two things that were a guarantee. good weed and a sick house to smoke at.

"get in."

he got in the passenger seat and threw his belongings in the backseat. he didn't live far? at least to my memory. i lived alone in a shit apartment in the inner city. it was a gift from my mom who just wanted me to grow up. cooper, well he lived with his strange friends. closer to the university but further away from the city. like in the suburbs? whatever, i followed the road i remember riding my skateboard down many times in the middle of the night to just talk to cooper and get away from everything.

"dude! iz! i got something i wanna talk to you about when we get to my place. i think you'd like it."

oh christ, what in gods name is he going to tell me. i never really thought about it but
cooper's like a really nice guy and he hangs out with me? for why? we've never really connected on anything but drugs and maybe cs:go a few times. whatever. we pulled into the driveway and i put the car in park before turning the engine off like youre supposed to. im sped.

cooper hopped out of my car and shut the door gently. i really slammed my door and took off my graduation gown and sat it on the driver seat through the rolled down window.

"hey iza."

travis spoke, he was a good kid. i liked him, he was polite and he always had a smug face that reminded me never to really trust him with my first born. you know?

"hey trav."

i smiled and waved before going in through the garage. there really wasn't anyone here. it was quiet. that's a change.

i followed cooper up to his room, it was cleaner than usual. his monitor was still on, his closet was open. i really feel like he just showed up for his diploma. i sat on his bed and watched him kick his shoes off and sit in his chair.

i took the joint that he handed me earlier from behind my ear, i touched through my pockets on my pants for a lighter. i looked at cooper and snapped my fingers, as you would to use a lighter. he stood up. like this man didnt already have one on his person? but. he stood up and went for a jacket that was hanging up behind the door. i looked away and felt air swoosh in my face.

"catch."

cooper said swiftly as i got pelted in the cheek by a lighter. not my proudest moment. i lit the joint and handed it off to him.

"iza, answer me this—"

he stopped talking to hit the poorly wrapped joint and ghosted the smoke.

"—what if you moved out of your rank ass apartment?"

i just kinda sat there with my maw gaping. what the fuck does this man think he's going to do? move my ass around with what money? i was baffled. this was some comedic relief i guess.

"where?"

i said and yoinked the joint from his fingers and put it in between my lips. cooper shrugged, this man didn't have a follow up.

"we have an extra bedroom, its like an actual home here."

this man had a follow up.

"you know what coop, i'll let you know."

he smiled and spun around in his chair. was this a victory? did i sign a pact? am i going to be framed? man im high. son of a bitch.

i opened my phone and kinda stared. i wasn't due for a text from anyone. my romance was dead. the only person i get any type of affection from are parked on santa monica boulevard outside the club. thats a joke oh my god. calm down.

i had to go home i was just staring and thinking to myself like a criminal. i stood up and picked my keys off the bed.

"uh, i'll text you. i have work tomorrow."

i muttered and gently punched at coopers shoulder.

"okay izzy."

he squeezed at my side. i squeaked and swatted at his hand.

i walked out of his room and out the house through the garage. it was almost dark out, birds were still chirping. i threw open the driver door, sat down and started it. i kinda just sat there for a minute. i backed out and started to drive home.

i had the windows rolled down and my music was loud. i felt my speakers shake the ground. i lost sense of time when i came to my parking garage. i greeted my desk guy and went into my unlocked apartment.

don't ask why its unlocked, i don't really know either. convenience? i sat on my bed and laid there over my covers.

i've reached the peak of summer already.

damn.