Pretty Boy [bxb] | ✔️

• Chapter fifty-four: You're going to hate me

You're going to hate me

I suddenly wake up from an intense nightmare that consists of Alex breaking up with me. Pressing the back of my hands to my cheeks, immediately finding the dampness of them, I find that I've been crying in my sleep.

I don't realise that I'm practically gulping for air until I hear Alex's hands lightly touch my waist and him whispering, "Shh, you're alright, baby."

His touch instantly calms me, and turning to look at him, seeing him right beside me, being able to touch him, brings me back to almost complete serenity. My Alex. He's here.

Since our argument, my fears about losing Alex have increased. I know they shouldn't do, and it's not like I think that he's going to abruptly break up with me, or that we'll have another argument soon, because I really don't, I have a lot of trust in our relationship. I just never want to lose him, and my nervousness about that is nothing I can control.

My fears do not stem from the fact that I think we're easily breakable, either. We've got a strong relationship, and that's been established in such a short about of time, which I put down to both our personal issues, but I think that's also why I'm so nervous. I have become so much stronger with him by my side, and that's not me relying on him too much, I think it's just the effect he has on me as a person. You never know what's going to happen in the future, and I'm not just talking about breaking up now, I mean worse, like something bad happens and he ends up dying or something.

I don't know why, but our argument, and then him getting into a physical fight where he could have gotten really hurt, put that all into perspective, and now I'm truly reminded that I have no clue what is to come. I don't want anything bad to happen to him or us as a couple.

"Oh, thank God. It felt so real," I breathe out, holding a hand to my chest. I can feel my heart thumping on my palm. I use my other hand to grab Alex's, so I can feel him, assure myself that he's here, he's mine still, he didn't break up with me, we're fine. He's fine.

"Do you want to talk about what it was about?" Alex asks, resting his head back on his pillow, his hand still in mine. I shake my head and lie back down. I'm about to close my eyes and mumble out that I'm going back to sleep when he lets out a, "hey."

"What?"

"You were using me as a pillow before," He tells me.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realise I was doing that," I apologise, turning on my side so that I'm fully facing him. I pout as an extra way of saying sorry.

"Was it comfortable?" He questions. I nod, because I really was, weirdly. He's warm, and his presence comforts me, so being as close to him as I can makes me feel as safe as I can. "Continue, then."

"Are you sure? I don't want you to be uncomfortable."

"I would never be uncomfortable having you near me. I like it, so please, lay your head on me," he instructs, and I do as he says. I place my head on his chest, wrap my arm around him, and snuggle into him, already feeling much more comfortable than I do with my head on a pillow.