Drawn To You ↠ Henjei ↠ PREQUEL To "Everything Will Be Alright" [ COMPLETED ]

"Deja Vu" Pt. 11

     There I saw Luna. She was sitting on a towel that she had laid out in the sand, sipping on some green, healthy looking beverage with sunglasses and a hat on. I furrowed my eyebrows which was a bad habit I had when it came to contemplating if I should do something. What I was confused about is why she hasn't said a damn word to me at all today. Even when I went out to eat breakfast, she was nowhere to be found. Same thing with lunchtime. She hadn't even bothered to ask how I was doing.

     I started walking up to her, my hands shoved in the pockets of my pants. I stood over her, blocking the sun from hitting her skin. She lifted her sunglasses and glared at me, "Oh, hey." She said and flashed a white smile.

     "Where have you been?" I asked seriously, my jaw clenched and my head still pounding from the night before.

     She stared at me blankly and at lost for words, "What?"

    "I haven't seen you at all today, and you haven't spoken to me since you got all pissed at me asking about Mike." I said and stared at her. She showed no emotion in her expression whatsoever and it was starting to annoy me how she was always so nonchalant about everything. "Well?" I repeated after not getting a response in a full minute.

     "I went to the store to get you some pain killers this morning and then took a little bit longer than usual because I was grabbing some stuff I need too." Luna replied in a petty tone. I relaxed a bit and felt a tad guilty at the way I came onto her like that. "They're on the counter. You're welcome."

     I frowned, "How come you never even texted?"

     "Look, Tarjei- I don't know how long you've been starved of attention but I can't constantly revolve around you, you know. You can't be the center of someone's life, when are you going to realize that?" She said coldly, and though normally I'd protest against that, I think it might be true. Do i really expect too much attention? Am i needy? Attached? "Also, if you hadn't gotten so drunk last night you'd know that wasn't the last time I spoke to you. Who do you think helped you when you were puking in the bathroom? Who do you think comforted you when you were crying over ghosts? Who brought you water when the sour taste of barf was in your mouth? Me, Tar."

      I had honestly figured Henrik would've been the one to do all that for me, but I just believed her because she was my girlfriend. I stood there and frowned, "I'm sorry. I'm having trouble remembering anything, so I'm just going based off of what I know."

      "Well, clearly you don't know enough." She laid back down on the towel and shut her eyes, ignoring my presence, but she couldn't for long. She let out a long sigh and then sat up. "Okay, I forgive you." Luna stood up and wrapped her arms around me then pressed a kiss to my neck. She connected our lips into a deep kiss that would've been pretty intimate if i was just slightly happier. "Let's go to my room."

     As much as I didn't feel like it, I said yes because I just couldn't mess up this relationship. I needed to keep her happy, so I agreed and we went to her room.

-Thursday

     The last few days of this trip felt very slow. We did most of the same stuff, play games, watch movies, make smores, go on a boat, but it just started to be dreadful being here. Just every which way I went, Lea was giving me dirty looks, Luna was scolding me for not wanting to make out every 5 minutes, and Henrik was just Henrik. Amazingly handsome, charming, entrancing, compelling, and it bothered me to have to constantly see him kiss Lea, tell her he loves her, tell her how gorgeous she was- it was starting to become sickening, but I was probably just jealous.

     As selfish as it seemed, it was tiring to see the person you want to be with, the only person you've genuinely wanted to be with, the only person who felt real, the only person who made you happy, the only person who understood you, in love with someone else. It was constant torture, and as much as I wanted to enjoy this trip with Luna, I knew that no matter how amazing she was- she wasn't Henrik and she never would be. 

     I was really starting to consider breaking up with her after this trip. Knowing my bad habits might come back or I might start thinking of harming myself again without her to distract me, I felt it'd be better than having to fake my happiness in a relationship.

      I was out on the balcony as i thought of this. I started to come out here almost every night after Henrik fell asleep, just to sort out my thoughts and get some fresh air away from everyone- except, tonight, I was wrong when I thought he had fallen asleep.

     I heard the doors open from behind me. I looked over my shoulder at him and the corners of my lips tugged into a small smile. "Thought you went to sleep." I mumbled and turned around, leaning against the balcony's railing.

     He had this mischievous smirk on his face. "Come down to the water with me." He said hopefully and raised his eyebrows.

     "What?" I chuckled in a confused manner, "What time is it?" 

     "I'll see you down there," He said, purposely ignoring my question and giddily left the room. I shook my head and laughed then followed him.

      Henrik was running to the ocean faster than I could keep up. By the time I made it to where he was, he was already splashing around in the water with this brightest, most wholesome smile I had ever seen. He looked like he didn't have a care or worry in the world, I wanted to feel like that. He met my eyes and motioned for me to come in. 

      I laughed to myself as I tip toed into the water, "Henrik- it's literally freezing!" I exclaimed as goosebumps raised all over my body. I shook my head, "I am not going in all the way."

      He tilted his head at me and like some kind of cheetah, sped towards me, grabbed me by the waist and threw me into the water. I screeched and gasped for air and at first I was frustrated, but then I decided to get revenge and once I did, I couldn't stop smiling. Henrik fell into the water as well and got on top of me, holding me down halfway in the water.

      "Henrik, don't you dare-" Next thing I knew, my head was pushed under water for just a second and when I came up, he was hysterically laughing as I shivered in my wet, heavy clothes.

      He put his arms out in an apologetic way and tried suppressing his smile but failing. "I'm sorry, come here." 

      I rolled my eyes and kicked water into his face, but he showed no reaction to it. He stood up and walked towards me. I tried to run away but he grabbed my hips and pulled me into his embrace. I was left stiff in his arms, unsure of why he did that but it was a pleasant surprise. I eased into the hug, letting my body relax and my arms wrap around him.

      "Damn, I missed you so much." He said into my ear. I pulled back and chuckled, running a hand through my dripping hair.

      "What do you mean you missed me? I haven't gone anywhere recently." I said and sat down in the water which he did too. 

      Henrik shook his head, "I mean over those many months we didn't speak. You were the only thing I could ever think about, the only thing I craved- and you still are, Tarjei." He explained, his eye contact intense. I didn't know how to respond, so i just played with the wet sand in my hands. "And I tried to push you out of my mind because I felt guilty, but then- then you were at the movies and that was the first time I had seen you in so long. I knew since that day that I couldn't go back to trying to forget about all of it, and I remember that same night at around like- 2am or something , damn, I don't remember exactly when but it was in the middle of the night and I tried so hard to resist the urge to text you and ask if you were awake."

      For some reason, this all sounded so familiar to me- like deja vu or something, but it was so long ago that i couldn't think of why. I just listened intently and waited until he was finished. When he did, he stared at me blankly until a look of realization flashed across his face, then came regret. 

      "I'm sorry for saying all that. I know you've moved on and I don't want to hurt you again any-" Henrik tried to finish, but i cut him off by springing forward and attaching my lips to his.