we conned hitman bang | bts crackdic

crack head lady

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it was at this moment LV & PF knew they fucked up.

"shut the fuck up narrator! this is my point of view, LV you dumbass. if you didn't know," i growl annoyed by the random deep voice pooping out of nowhere without a body to back itself up. it was just a voice and it honestly felt like an announcer was right beside us, and i was getting creeped out by it.

"LV this isn't the time to fight with the dude who has a sexy voice. we've got a deadman on our hands!" PF panics as she points to now presumably dead bradly. i sign knowing i have nothing to do with this entire situation. i all i wanted to do tonight was watch rap monster oppar fancams, not help PF bury this hater in an undisclosed location!

"let's just put him back in his house," i say nonchalant, "we can always pretend it wasn't us."

i hear PF take a deep breath before yelling, "HOW THE FUCK DO YOU PRETEND YOU DIDN'T KILL SOMEONE?"

"just tell the whole apartment complex PF! just fucking tell them," i scoff at how idiotic she's behaving, "we watch like three episodes of HTGAWM,"

she stares at me really confused and i groan, "must i do all the thinking around here? how to get away with murder! the show remember??"

"oooh yeah... and? that doesn't help our case," she sighs running her hands through her hair, "we've got to at least bury him LV, we did you know k word him."

"errr, i don't do community service. plus i don't remember shooting him in the ass,"

suddenly PF and i hold a glaring contest with one another for a long period of time. we just both glare at each other both mildly covered in ass blood. no one speaks since we are pretty skilled in the art of staring, we have to because when we watch kpop stages. one blink and you'll miss the entire preformance.

a cough escapes from someone's mouth and it wasn't me. so in response, my eyes widen a little at the fact that PF could even cough without opening her mouth.

"did you just cough with your mouth shut?" we both ask at the same time realizing it wasn't one of us. both of us freaking the fuck out, we crane our necks toward the apparently dead but still alive bradly.

"o-once boss finds out that you guys shot me in ass, y-y-y-you are b-b-bo-"

"i'm sorry but i can't u-u-unders-st-stand you," i laugh making fun of his stuttering, it wasn't my brightest moment, but he was an ass (no pun intended) and i already knew i had a special seat in hell anyways.

"i'm the bosses right-hand man," he croaks and i laugh even harder as he tries to 'gloat', "we are like the fucking omega bitches of the fucking gang, but PF still managed to beat your ass! well PF, we got you a new position,"

that was a total knee slapper.

"y-you guys wi-" he pauses a small breath escaping his mouth before he goes limp.

"mr. keisha? mr. keisha?" PF asks shaking his hopefully now dead body, "don't look at me like that, that's his last name."

i couldn't control my laughter any longer as she begins to shake the now dead bradly keisha! this is the funniest shit that has happened to me since that one time PF swallowed a chia pet! "oh my fuckin god, he fuckin dead."

"stop laughing LV," PF panics for the 1000x tonight, "we could go to jail!"

we lay on our bed thinking of what the fuck we are going to do now. we are practically screwed. it's been about an hour since we accidentally killed bradly, and now we've both come to the realization.