Severus Snape X Reader One Shots

Happy Hunting~

     "Listen here, you little shit, and listen good! I didn't come all this way just for some slimy ass-hat to sit back and tell me how to do my fucking job! So shut up, sit down, and stay that way unless you want me to tear your heart out and use its blood to feed to your students, in turn causing a mass infesation of wendigo's the likes of which your lanky ass has never seen!!!"

     Severus was forced up against a wall with a large carving blade pressed threateningly against his throat. What could he do in this situation? His wand was in his left hand, which was being held behind his back, used to pin him, so that was out of the question. His students, who were staring in utter horror and disbelief, surely weren't going to do anything. If he spoke, he feared speaking too slowly and causing this chaotic bitch to carve into him. But, what could he do? Nod? Nod. Nodding seems safe.

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     How did things come to this, you may be asking? Well, there has been six vampire sightings around the castle, and the only seemingly safe thing to do would be to call in the vampire hunters... but oh, did they get the most difficult one, or what. (Y/n) is a very high ranking vampire huntress with an incredible hunting record and a bit of a chaotic, firey temper. She already slayed five of the vampires in the area within the first night of her being there, and was tracking the last one through the castle halls, when she walked in on potions class. I'm sorry, walked in? No. She kicked the fucking door off of its hinges, nearly crushing Severus against a wall. Luckily he was able to jump out of the way just in time. Not as much could be said for the potion he was brewing. Poor mixture was splattered all over the floor and wall. The cauldron? What cauldron. Theres nothing left of it! So, Severus did the the thing that almost anyone would do in this situation.

     Big. Mistake.

     "Are you insane?! That almost killed me! What in the hell is wrong with you?!" Severus was staring at her, holding his chest, and breathing heavily after seeing exactly what that force did to his cauldron.

     "Ill buy a new one. Now, where is it?"

     "What?! I dont care about the cauldron! I care that you almost killed me! Who do you thi-"

     "WHERE... is it?"

     "... What? Where is what?!"

     "My god, youre so stupid... have you no idea who I am?"

     Meanwhile, the students were sitting there in absolute shock. This woman just kicked this door so hard and with such velocity that it turned a cauldron to dust. Is she even human?! She really did almost kill Professor Snape!

     "Excuse me?!"

     "No, I'm not done with you yet. My name is (Y/n) (L/N), Vampire Huntress, and your only lifeline if one of those bastard waltzes its way in here! Now, who the fuck are you, and why should I give two shits?

     "Vampire Huntress... Well you aren't doing a very good job, consitering you almost murdered me! Why didnt you just walk in?! Like a normal person! Seriously, can you get any more thoughtless?!"

     She stared at him... Expression unchanged. Until. A slow growing, scarily wide smile begins to spread across her face, stretching nearly from ear to ear. She cocked her head to the side with wide eyes and jerky movements, letting off a very unsettline aura that held the promise of bloodlust.

     All of the students in that moment ran. Some to the back of the room, huddling together, careless about who was in which house. Others quickly passed behind (Y/n) to escape the classroom, desperate to be as far away from this terrifying, chaotic woman.

     She began to laugh softly. It would've seemed sweet if it weren't for that face she was making. "You wanna run that by me again? Severus Tobias Snape...?"

     He froze. Eyes wide, body trembling. "How did y-"

     SLAM

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     And thats where all hell broke loose and caused this poor situation.

     Severus nodded quickly, and suddenly began to feel his left arm being twisted even more by the second, causing tears to well up and making him hiss and curse under his breath, until he couldnt take the constant twisting any longer. "STOP! Damnit, PLEASE!"

     He fell uncerimoniously to the floor after being let go of. Severus shakily turned his head to look up at this woman. Her smile, back to a normal, painless size. Her eyes sparkling with mischief and curiosity. Her arms, no longer jerky, as they lay comfortably aganst her hips. "Aw... now was that so hard?" (Y/n) spoke softly, looked aroud the room for a few moments, deemed it clear, and made her way out to continue with her hunt.

     Severus turned his head back towards the wall he was just forced against, holding his arm as he rested his forhead against the wall, completely ignoring the terrified students in the back of the class.

Only one thing could keep circulating its was through his mind...

     Why did I enjoy that?