Barely Holding On (M.C.)

Chapter 1

Worthless. Ugly. Waste of space. Literally, this is my life and boy does it suck ass. I bet you're wonder "Omg what's making this girl feel this way." So, I'll tell you. Everyone. Everyone makes me feel this way. Ever step through the school halls is hell and I'm on the spotlight of it. I'm only being treated like this because people found out I like one freaking guy. But it just had to be the most popular guy in school. So when everyone found out, they thought it would be real funny to make fun of me for the rest of my life. But it's not like it's nothing I can handle. I've been going through a year of it so I can manage, right? I let out a small sigh before opening the stall door in the girls bathroom, trying to ignore the looks from the other girls. I walked out of the bathroom, not only to be met by the biggest asshole in the world. My crush. A.k.a Michael fucking Clifford. His eyes quickly met mine and he gave me a small wave. I gave him a small smile back, ducking my head immediately after and sinking away with the crowd of people. He knows I like him. I just don't know why he's so chill about it. People push and shove me into the walls lockers as I pass by them. I can feel my face getting redder by the minute knowing that Michael probably isn't to far behind beause we have the next three fucking periods together.

"Hey Julia!" I hear someone call and I look around in the general area I'm in. "Did you go cut in the bathroom because Michael will never love you? You know you're ugly as fuck right?" I bite my lip and pull my Blink 182 hood up over my head. I turn around and see Michael punching one of his friends shoulders and shaking his head. All his friends are laughing. Except him. I see him mouth "I'm sorry" to me and I duck away back into the crowd.

I got to the classroom how I normally would, getting pushed and shoved around like a rag doll. I sunk back into my desk which lies perfectly in the back corner of the room. The classroom fills up quickly with students who give me their usual glares and dirty looks before continueing on whatever they were talking about. I sink into my chair, just wanting to disapear like I normally do.

"Hey. Anyone sitting here?" I don't look up.

"No. Go ahead." I mumble out. I pull my books out of my bag and finally look to see who sat next to me. Fuck. My heart nearly falls out of my chest when I see Michael casually sitting next to me. I glanced around the room to see people giving us looks and whispering to each other.

"What are you doing?" I asked harshly. "This isn't good for you." I tried to make myself as small as possible and end up looking like an idiot instead.

"Sorry about my friend. He's an asshole sometimes." Michael casually changes the subject and runs his hand through his dyed red hair. Michael has been known for dyeing his hair a lot. Which I don't mind considering mine used to be blonde but now it's a deep brown and black color.

"It's fine. You don't have to sit next to me." I send him a look of empathy to tell him to move but he just smiled.

"You don't cut do you?" He casually tapped his fingers on the desk and looked around like he said nothing.

"I-I." I look at him, taken back by the question. "I used to. But its been a while." I bit my lip as the lies rolled out of my mouth in an almost too perfect rythm. I casully tugged on my hoodie sleeves, actually trying to hide my scars from yesterday night.

"Good. You wanna come over tonight." His eyes flick from me to straight ahead and I almost pass out.

"What?" I cough out.

"Yeah. Just to hang out." He pulls out his phone and looks at me like I should do the same. I repeat his actions and pull out my phone which he quickly takes out of my grasp. He enters his phone number into mine and smiles. "Meet me after school by the old library." He smiles genuinely at me, sending a chill up my spine.

"Um, okay." I stutter on my words and bite my cheek. I couldn't focus the rest of the class. I just couldn't get over that fact that Michael just asked me to hang at his house. Can someone tell me what the fuck just happened?