Wounded Butterfly 🦋

Sharing "His" pain in "His" way

(Sorry this is a long update,i want to wrap it up in a single chapter,pardon me)

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She smiled while looking at him and made him sit beside her. She wanted to talk to him. He dont have any idea what is she going to talk. He thought it would be something regarding her nervousness for her new show, new industry,new people and something like that. But she is "Shehnaaz Kaur Gill" and her favourite thing to do is, to shock her very own "bebu".
     He sat beside her. She has some questions in her mind about her feelings and their bond. Why she has to say so mch abt what they have been sharing, why dont he? Let it be! I need him and want him to be there with me so if i have to do this,its ok. I will do.
     She started the conversation on a lighter note wdout knowing where it could lead and what will be the result. She is playing with fire,which will burn her soul,heart and happiness. This will result in agony, anguish and helplessness. She thought it will be a smooth conversation but it wont be.
     "Lamba project hai na, acha b h, dekh ab to mein tere pass hi rahun gi yaheen pe" (winks at him)
     He looked at her and said"Han acha hai"
     "Kiya acha hai"?
     "Sab acha hai"
     "Tu khush nahi h na"?
     "Me q nhi houn ga"?
     "Tu ne kuch kaha b nahi k tu khush hai ya ye hoga aise wese".
     "Hug kia na teko, aur kia bolun ab".
     "Lekin baqi sab ne to..."
     He interupted her immediately"Tu pagal h yr?Jo teko chaiye hmesha voi karun ga main?Sara time dimagh kharab karti h." This time his tone was bit high and its difficult for her to start a conversation again.
     *Awkward silence*
     "Ok chal m ja rha hun ander aja" he said and left.
     He was avoiding her but why? Its v clear now,something is bothering him.What is that, he wont tell me. Now she is sure,this show is making him fee this way,he wants me to ask him. I should ask him. Atleast for once! After 15 mins, BB announced them to stay inside the house they have to arrange something in the garden area for a task. Only she was outside she stood up and entered in the house,she saw him sitting with paras while arti was straightening her hair and reshmi and asim was also in the bedroom area. She passed by them and went into the washroom to think more abt the things.
     These are the last days of their
"All- time togetherness" and they dont want to end up like this. Sidharth felt, his reaction was a bit harsh. He went behind her,called up her name twice but she ignored him completely and keep going. She was abt to enter in luggage area he skipped and grab her hand"Abay oo moti! Kab se se bula rha hoon, problem kia h"
     "Meko koi nai h, tujhe e hogi"
     "Mereeeyyy kooo"?he asked surprisingly
     "Han hurt kia h tune mujhe bht jyaada,jane de ab meko", she said while lowering her gaze.
     "Abay oo! Tera dimagh kharab hogya h,kia itna stress le rahi h,relax reh, aur vo by chance main gusse se bola gya tha to sorry, abhi theeek hai" while bending his head down to met her gaze.
     She lifted her head up,"ahhaaannn" and hugged him tightly.
     He want to reciprocate with same warmth but he cant, he placed his one arm around her waist and held her with his soft grip.
     "I love u" she said in her baby's voice while hugging him.
     This is last thing he dont want to listen from her today. He broke the hug immediately and was abt to leave when she stopped him by grabing his shirt from behind.
     "Ruk ja,aja baat krty hn, beth ja mere pas idhr e" she said helplessly.
     "Hmmmm"he murmured.
He stayed there. They are still standing in the entrance of luggage area.
     "Tu b bol na i love u aj to bol de, bahir jaa k to tu mile ga b nai" she demanded.
     "Right,right, right! Tu bahir ho gi to milun ga na, aur wese b mere i love u se koi farq nahi parta ab" he said while raising his eyesbrows.
     "Kia mtlb, fark nahi padta"?
     "Bht log bolne vale hain na ab to tujhe ilu, main bolun na bolun"
     "Q bkwasss kr rha h, mujhe nahi pasand teri ye baatein"
     Sahi h, sahi h, sahi h!!
     "Meri baat sun" she want his attention now so she cupped his face.
     "Tujhe koi problem to nahi h mere ye show krne se. Ye show e hai bas sidharth,real nahi h, real m to m tujhse e pyaar krti hn aur..."
     He interupted her while frowning "Dekhooo! Meko koi problem q hogi,tmhain jooo krna h kro, jaise krna h kro. Real kro fake kro meko koi lena dena nahi" he removed her hands from his face and replied in a cold tone.
     "Ye shaadi ka show h, teko koi prob nahi h"?
     "Nahiiii" he replied and rolled his eyes.
     "Kyunnnn"? She wrapped her arms around his waist and was abt to lean on his chest for a hug, he moved her apart. She repeated it,he did the same while looking at her with zero expressions on his face. This is very new side of him for her. He is talking to her bt his warmth was missing.
     Yarr shehnaaz, plisss!!replied angrily
     "Bta meko phly q"?she was not letting him go now wdout answering.
  "Q k main nahi krta vo feel jo tm krti ho, Bass"!! he said in a cold and loud tone now. He was struggling and fighting with his own emptiness. He said loudly to get rid off from this feeling. Something broke inside her again. She is going to have one more scar on her soul,one more wound on her heart from him.
     "Mtlb"? she responded with extreme pain in her eyes.
     That stare choked his heart, he cant do this conversation wd her anymore. Not now!
     "Voi jo bola h" he was sounding so heartless and then he moved outside.
     Its v hard for him to control himself. Today he really want to punch the wall like he did in jail. But he dont have any reason for the Hms to do that and wont give the chance to the audience to see his vulnerability.        
        She moved into washroom in so pain and cried her heart out there. She knew he likes her so mch but somewhere in signing this show she hurt him. Her heart was aching on his confession and her loss. She was sobbing badly and was continuously murmuring
"Sorry,sorry,sorrryyy"!!!! There was no camera and she could cry, no one is watching her vulnerable side. Not even her sidharth!
       He was restlessly waiting for her outside. He dont want to face her again, but he wanted her to come outside atleast.
        After crying hard on her anguish she came,went on her bed and laid down. He saw her when he turned around while walking. There was clear from her face, she cried and cried badly. His heart missed a beat, why i have said this to her, i should control myself. No, she deserves, she hurts me often so i could hurt her.       
      There was a complete fight btw his heart and brain. Today it was again "love vs logic" and once again his "logic"won! Love was not lost but he took control of his heart now.
      Now he was feeling mch better as he vented out what he was holding. He gave her the same pain, he was feeling.He shared his pain with her in "his way". That's "Him"
         But somewhere there was restlesness, he grabbed a ciggerette from store box and went inside the bedroom area to smoke in washroom. He passed by her while stealing glances at her. She was looking very low, her red eyes and red face making her look more miserable. He went inside washroom and reshmi looked at both of them and got it. Something happened btw them bt wht? she was curious to know. She always wanted to find out their relationship. Now after a lot of events she came to know they liked eo but sidharth is not so vocal to her abt his feelings so she knew what she has to do. She did the same thing, gave some questions to sana abt him while knowing shehnaaz will not ignore them. Sid will answer in the same way as she thought he will. She succeeded.
         She asked shehnaaz "pyaar karti h tu"?
  Shenaaaz noded her head
  Haan? She noded her head again
  "Vo krta hai"?she asked immediately.
  She nodded her head.
  "Han ya na"she asked again
  She nodded once again but this time is for no!
  "Poocha"?she asked again
  She replied with her eyes "yes".
  *Awkaward silence* btw them, shehnaaz kept on thinking why he said he dont feel the same way, his touch never makes me feel he is not interested. Her head was exploding with pain.
        Reshmi felt a bit relaxed now,as she was exteremy obssessed with him and the time they have spent together. He gave her best time,best memories of her life. She wants him back same as he left. But he dont want to. Its her birthday also.She always wanted to know this that's why she said all this her.
       She was lying on her bed, reshmi was in kitchen to make tea. Sidharth was chatting with paras.Asim was doing something with his hair.
       Arti just came to her and took her hand in her hand and said with a wide smile on her face"aja chal bahir beth'te hain". She looked up at her for few seconds and get out from her bed. They went to sit in the living area,arti was talking abt her feelings for the show.She was not listening to her but was pretending she is. While sidharth shukla was stealing glances at her in the mirror. She was so quiet and he was not liking it at all.
   BB announced arti to go in the garden area for journey video she got excited and went. Shehnaaz was feeling *missfit* to be here now so she went to her bed again.
       Now she is making him mad,her silence is making him mad but he dont have any other reason to vent out his madness. He want her to call him for once. Please!! For once. I could not manao her this time.
   He went inside and sat on the chair right infront of mirror beside garments steamer. He switched onn the straightener and start straightening his hair, she was looking at him  under her comforter. He dint know. Reshmi came gave him his chaai and asked him "Main krdun, Achay se"?while frowning her eye brow.
   "Hayee, shivani desai krein gi, achay se, vo to meko pta hi hai ap har kaam acha se hi krti hain" taunts her in a friendly manner.
   "Ja mat krwa, aik to poocha sana soo rhi h islie, ata b nahi h tujhe to"she dint like his taunt.
   "Acha na!! chal krde peeche se,par theek se hann, mere baal ko b "jalaa" mat dena" he said and laughed whole heartedly.
    Reshmi just stared him while not liking his taunts.
    Shehnaaz saw he is happy and good with everyone. It's not affecting him any more now. I should behave sensible now,i should also not bother his confession and cool it.
       She came out from the comforter and went into the kitchen to have her food. Reshmi and sidharth look at eo in the mirror as they both expect something in reaction from her. She royally ignored and came back on her bed and started eating.
  "Chal hogya h ache se baqi m krleta hoon" he said after 7-8 mins of zero reaction.
  "Ok".
  "Thanks"
  "Welcome"
  (Both are good actors for a reason*rashmi& sidharth*)
The glass door of the house opened and arti came into bedroom with so mch joy,went stratight to sid and hugged him tightly,sid reciprocated her hug with the same warmth.          
       Shehnaaz recalled the way he moved her arms apart to stop her hugging him. Twice. It crushes her soul,she cant take it anymore. She left the bedroom while sidharth turned around to see her leaving with a deep frown on his face.
      ~We are never so vulnerable as when we love~

LOVE~
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(Concerns and suggestions are awaited by,pour out in comment section ❤️)
Its along update,coz i want to jump on the occasions post bb soon😂