Wounded Butterfly 🦋

Denial To Acceptance!

He sat on his bed beside her,looking at the mirror, he was fixing his straightened hair. She was lying on her side,looking at him with love.
"Maine ander se sari journey suni h teri", she said while being lost in him.
"Achaa" he happily replied her back with a glance.
"Aur pta hai, roii bhi main" she said in a flow,it was totally unintentional as she was busy in gawking him.
"Awww, he also said in a flow then he paid heed to it wht she said.
Par roi q? he suddenly asked.
"Hain, she composed herself now, wese e bas, meko pta e nai kaise aagaya rona meko"!
She turned over, to conceal her feelings again from him. Now its tiring for her to be upfront for the feelings she has for him, concealing is the better option now.
He left stunned, she is one minute like the loved one and the next minute stranger! He want her to acknowledge his annoyance at once. He will fix the rest but she is not in a mood.Not today!!
Asim and rashmi went for their vids and she was waiting for her turn.
"BB mujhe pta h ap meko end m bhejo gay" she giggled.
Now its her turn, she left the house and moved outside. People drooled over her,screaming her name  and making her giggling out loud. She was dancing, giggling, showering and receiving the love of her fans,immitating them. She was really enjoying that.
Sid sat on the sofa in the living area to listen what BB has to say to her.
BB voice over came, fulfilled her wish of her admiration. They had done it in a sweetest way , like they never did this for anyone else before. They have also given her the title of show, wich made her the happiest. Its like a dream come true to her. A proud and satisfied smile came on sid's face while bb announcing her queen of the show. He got up and left the living room,moved to his bed. BB talked abt her boldness, admired her honesty to her soul. They had mentioned sid's name, she laughed out loud.
She saw her journey video while his heart was tearing up on her convos wd SK,  happy tears started filling her eyes. The way SK used to hypes her up, enjoyed talking to her, made her feel loved, she is going to miss all of this alot. Sid's part came and left her numb. She was happy to see them, but she was not that much excited, she was lost somewhere still in her last convo wd him. While watching she was badly convincing her heart what he said,he said in anger, he dint mean it. She giggled on their fights, masti and cozy moments.She saw the scenes in which he said ilikeu and ilu to her, she was happy to see that. After her journey she was so overwhelmed to see soo mch love for her,for "Shehnaaz Kaur Gill". From most hated girl to most loved girl. She conquered the hearts of so many people,she was so delighted to watch this.
They asked her to sing veham for them, she sang it and left with some crazy screams for her.
She moved to her bed on which he was already lying . She gathered all the torn pieces of her heart again, she is ready to hurt herself for one more time. She sat beside him
" Tu ne mjhe ilu bhi bola hua aur i like u bhi, footage chali gai h bahir to ab ziada chant mat bana kr aur boldia kr,"while gawking at all the housemates.
First of all sid found it, too out of the box but then he heard the laughter of the other Hms, so he laughed it out too. She giggled to see all of them laughing. But she is not happy with his response. While he was very satisfied now bcz she gave zero fu*ks to his confession and went easy on it. Thats how she is, finding a reason to smile and make him smile at any cost. He is her happiness and she is his happy poem in true sense.
Later on,after journey videos,cameras turned off, BB voiceover came and wished Rashmi desai again, asked Asim to grab her cake from store box.
They cut it down and fed her. Now sid went to feed her, rashmi was not opening her mouth, she knew he is not here to feed her, he will do what he did on the sets of DSDT. After so many attempts,she opened her mouth but sid being sid, applied the whole piece on her face and she was hell angry at him now. Rashmi is after him with a piece in her hand and was running behind him. From living to kitchen to dining. They were happily behind eo in their own world. But someone is gazing them, wordless, she cant stop herself of doubting their equation. They must had shared something special and beautiful. What we have is tht mch beautiful for him or not? His world is v different from mine. Where i stands in his life? This is not the sidharth i know,he said he dont like her,but still very friendly with her,her brain struck. He dont like me to b cordial wd her but y is he? Why only i have to do things he said to me  and he dint even mean it when it comes to him.  For the  very first time, His laughs, giggles breaking her pieces of heart into more pieces,she had enough of him. She felt her vision became vague, her eyes were moistened. She left the dining hall and went into luggage area. She pretended she was doing something with her clothes but actually she was escaping herself from another break down. It would be the worse than before and she knew it. She felt warm sensation on her cheeks, tears started rolling down on her cheeks, she was not in a mood to wipe them off. She never felt this much anguish in her whole life. A lot of things were crushing her soul.
She sat there for almost an hour and in that hour sid dint come to see her. But there is no noise outside, it looks like everything has calmed down. She splashed some water on her face, it gives unusual pleasure and serenity to her sore eyes, she splashed for one more time, she did it until she dint feel any sore feeling. She picked up some napkins and wiped her face off and moved to change her clothes.
Now she was in her PJs,applying some moisturizer on her feet, arti came in washroom and took her name.
Shehnaaz Gill??
Han?
Tu yahan h, kia kr rhi? Chal aja abhi sidharth ne bheja mereko, kab se pooch raha h tera.
Han aa rhi hun, she replied not looking at her.
Sun, ruk m b change kr lun chalte hn phr, wese tu kab se nai dikhi meko, pareshaan lag rhi h, kia hua h sid se jhagra to nai hogya?
Han , nahi, nahi yr syapa vo sar m dard tha thora! Sidharth se krun gi main jhagda! Bilawaja to nahi krun gi na.
Hein hein, teko waja chaiye us se jhagdne k lie, she said and laugh, made her laugh too.
She came to her on washroom bed and laughingly hugged her from side and were saying " Hain chaiye waja,hain,hain" and started pulling her cheeks.
Right there, sid came with paras, they were discussing something, laughing and giving high five. They were standing in luggage area now. Paras was inside while sid was there in the frame of the entrance.
She saw them from the mirror right infront of her and hugged back arti  by placing her arms around her neck. They both were moving to and fro, she closed her eyes. Why? She dont know. She dint even want to face him and also not want him to see her red eyes.
He stared at her in the mirror while talking,came to her, stood infront of them, asked arti abt her with his hand gesture? She shrugged unknowingly. 
Chal ab meko jane dey, arti said to her with a smile on her face,looking at sid.
Haha noo,she replied with closed eyes.
Chal na tu iske sath beth ab, aagya h ye,ye le, she stood up, pulled him on her place.
She opened her eyes,saw him sitting with her, saw arti who has wide grin on face and then she went. She dint get any chance to say no.
She lowered her head again,massaging her feet. He was looking at her, observing her closely, her red eyes, red nose, clean face telling him where was she busy.
Abay oo, he jerked her with his shoulder.
Ooo moti, now spanked her head lovingly.
Kia hua h teko,oyee?? He grabbed her hand now.
She just gave him a stare.
He felt something in his chest, an ache in his heart. She was looking so miserable.
He moved his arms around her and kept her in his embrace and asked her lovingly
Kia hua baby? Bol to!
Kuch nahi, aise e sab yaad aa rhe the.
To ho to raha h khatam sab, mil laiyen.
Han, she was replying normally but inside her heart there was nothing normal. She really want to tell him,how much pain she is enduring right now. She want to show him the scars he gave but she cant do it.
Han chal sona h meko, neend aa rhi h, she wanted to stand up.
He dint let her and grabbed her hand more tightly  "han? To mere bina to neend b nahi ani teko!Han?? He questioned,
"So jaien abhi to beth"! He furrowed.
She stayed.
Sun,oye oyeee! Shehnaaz! He palmed her face from both sides and lowered himself to meet her gaze.
Tujhe jesa lag rha h wesa nahi h kuch b, he told her looking into her eyes
Kiaa?she asked innocently
Voi jo tu sooch rhi h
Han bol to dia h tune, lag gya h pta mujhe, she lowered her gaze with an annoyed face.
Kia bol dia h maine? Abay nahi vo nai, daikha maine ander atay hue teko idhr.
Nahi aisa kuch nahi h, mujhe koi prob nahi h tu jese marzi rahey uske sath, she replied in annoyance.
To fir dikha vo meko, he replied while being annoyed too.
Their eyes met for an instance, she immediately lowered her eyes and pushed her head down.
*Awkward silences*
Acha dekh,oye gadhi, suno, uska last bday jo hmne set p kia tha na, uske bad aj uska bday celebrate kia h hmne aik sath, tab b yahi hua tha,bas aise meko yad aya,i did it, par tu  q fukat ka stress le rhi h is sab k peeche
Maine bola kuch? Yar mujhe to teri smjh nahi aati! Finally she broke her shell and spoke up.
Right, right,right! Sidharth was gazing her with a deep frown and letting her to speak.
Kabhi tujhe itna affect hone lag jata h kabhi to aise jaise janta b nahi h, tera ajeeb e system h.
Tujhe kon nai janta bhaiiii!! SHEHNAAZ KAUR GILL hai tu,duniya jaanti h apkoo, he said with a sweetest smile.
She gave him a deadly stare and he backed off
Ok ok!
Acha tu meko bta roo q rahi thi?
Pata nahi.
Hain???
Pta n...i, now her voice cracked, she felt her tears in her throat, she would not let them flow, not infront of him, not anymore. It never makes any differnce to his life. But the reality is different, he knew her vulnerability will bring lot of demands for him and he is not like that. He dont want to be more vulnerable for her now bcoz it will not only affect him in real world but also a deeper one on her. He dont want to give her any false hopes he cant even fullfill. He want to tell her this but camera always resisted him, now he can open this up to her bcoz cameras r not working now.
He gawked at her with a deep frown.
Shehnaaz tm pagal hogai ho? Q itna kar rhi h? Han?
Idhhrr dekhho, he moved her face upward from her chin and said with his gritted teeth.
Tm na jaan ke ye sab over kar rhi ho, teko hazaaar baar bola maine attachment h sab h, phr b teko rona h bilawaja ka, muh sadana h to raho tm. Main na life m apni maa aur behno k ilawa ksi ko nahi manaya itna, teko manaya h, tu friend h, close bhi h, par na jo ye sab, hmaree beeeech m hai, iska na bahir pata lage ga sahi m, he sighed.
She met her eyes to his. All he could see in them is sadness,how the stars looked when they lost their shine. It left him speechless for a moment.
He started the conversation again, main is lie nahi bol rha hoon k tere pas options hoonge ya mujhe koi aur mil jaye ga, dekh ye na aik artificial enviornment h, main life m jis se naraz hota hoon, us se door hojata hoon kuch dair k lie,bad m baat kr k agr solve hogya to sahi nai to bhaad m, mtlb ab meko farak nahi padta, par joo yahaaaan h na, dekh aisa h, m tere se gussa hoke jaa nahi skta na kaheen darling, samne e rehna h q k koi choice nahi h, par bahir ye choice h to teko nahi lagta h hmain isss sab see abhii affect nai hona chaiye, thora time dena chaiye? Han? Dosti h sab h, liking h aik lekin love h k nahi isko abhi nahi soochte? He sighed heavily, at last he said for what he was gathering his courage for so long.
Teko khush hona chaiye k tu jo kehti h k tera idhr udher hota rehta h, teko pta lag jaye ga sahi m kesa h?Hmmm?
He furrowed while looking at her.
She was half convinced by him, logically what ever he said is right but her heart is still not satisfied. He is actually not sure what he is holding for me? Fake kaheen ka,she thought.
She hugged him tightly and placed his hands on her back without giving him  any chance to reciprocate her hug. She dont want to give him any reason to say no to her after being out.
A wide grin spread on his face and he engulfed her in his arms with a tight grip.
While hugging he was thinking, i did it for us, he haven't been in such kind of relationship before. I spent good times,i do have good memories i would cherish but i dint spent my day and nights wd anyone else,he was not being selfish here, thats just his realistic approach towards life.He once again pushed her away from him with some hopes. He dont want to impose himself on her just for the sake of time they have spent here. He want her to take the decision, they cant jump onto the conclusions due to the fear of future. But still he has hope,she will be back to him like always. What future will hold for them, both have no idea but they knew with eo they will face everything. He squeezed her again in his arms and broke the hug.
Chal ab uth, bht late hogya h subh jaldi uthna h, rehersals k lie, he got up from there while she was holding his hand in her.
Sidharthhh!!! Kal valentines h!
Ohhh laaavelyy!!
Tu to bht miss kregi phr
Kisko??
Vishal ko
She stared him furiously, nahi nahi vo salman sir ne kaha tha naaa darling, k uska pyaar sacha h tere lie islie.
She removed her hand from his grip after so many attempts and was moving out of the washroom.
Abay yar chal na dimagh mat sada na ab, tu meko ni bolti rashmi ko le kr?
Han to salman sir ne to tujhe b bola tha, she turned around at the door.
Kia
Voi jo reporter ne bola tha k pyaar pyuurrr krti hun m tere se?
To phr??
To fir ye k uska to yakeen nahi kia tu ne, iska bara aagya tujhe
Maine aik baar b bola teko k tu jhut keh rhi? He questioned her,she moved out of the washroom and went towards the bedroom while immitating him
Vishal ko miss kregi?? Hunh! Bakwaaas!
Sidharth really enjoyed her this side, he ran towards her and hugged her from the back and planted a soft kiss on her cheek.
Relax, relax bas bas!!
She was at peace somehow. They moved towards their bed to have almost one of last sleep together in this house. He joined her pillow to his,lied down, grabbed her and placed her head on his shoulder and put her hand on his chest and took her in his soft embrace. She smiled, removed her comforter aside and went into his. He rubbed her cheeck from his hand and placed it over her to go into deep slumber.He was contented as he knew he has gave her so mch to not move on from him with such an ease.
After such a tiring and rough day, he is there for her and she is there for him. Thats the beauty of their equation, at last they find peace of eo, in eo.
Happy smiles played on their faces while sleeping,the last thought came in his mind was

I let u break me
Then
Waited for u to fix me ~

LOVE~
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Hope u will like this update, like the rest!
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XOXO ❤️❤️