shut up, dumbass! | haikyuu ship reactions

tanalice

Me: We have a very interesting ship today folks.

Suga: Every time we gather for one of these ship reactions someone either gets hurt, starts crying, or has a midlife crisis.

Daichi: Seriously. I bet this ones gonna be crazier than the last few too. *crosses arms*

Emma: *laughs nervously* Well you might be right about that Dadchi...

Hinata: what's the ship?! what's the ship?! I cannot wait to see what happens in this one!!!

Tsukishima: Hey King, I hope you can calm the feral child down before he really goes nuts.

Kageyama: HINATA'S NOT MY PROBLEM FFS-

Hinata: whAt doEs a FeraL chIld mEan

Tadashi: I don't think you wanna know Hinata...

Me: Along with this very interesting ship, we also have a special guest today! He has come from a land way, way, WAY, farther from here so please make him feel welcome. Fred, come on in!

*Fred Weasley from Harry Potter steps into the room with a smug look*

Ali: *almost falls off chair* W-WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING HERE?!

Emma: Oh, young love. *claps*

Fred: Hello Ali! So good to see you again! *walks over and hugs her*

Ali: *face extremely flushed, but no one knows if it's because she's really angry or embarrassed that Fred is hugging her*

Tanaka: W-what the hell...do you think you're doing REDHEAD!!! *tries to charge toward them but is held back by Ennoshita*

Ali: *growls* Trust me Frederick, if I had my wand, I'd kill you faster than you can say-

Fred: *immediately lets go of her* That's the Ali I know and love! *pats her head*

Me: I wonder if this was a bad idea...

Fred: Of course not dear Cat! It would have been a bad idea if George were here though, because we would be in a LOT of trouble already-

Kageyama: HOLD UP, who the hell is this guy?? And why does he have a British accent?

Tsukishima: Has it ever dawned on you that maybe it's because he's from England?

Fred: Four eyes is right! I am from England! I'm a friend of the foreigners that you're stuck with for the rest of the book. So get comfortable volleynerds!

Tanaka: *walks right up to him with a sneer* Okay you little shit, this nice guy act is getting old. What is your business with my Ali-chan? *points a finger at his chest*

Fred: Calm down buddy! Me and Ali have some...history together. *winks at Ali who gives him the middle finger*

Me: *rushes up to them* Speaking of the ship that we are reacting to today, it is Tanalice, Ryūnosuke Tanaka and Alice Justin!!

Tanaka: FINALLY!!! *takes off shirt and starts whipping it around*

Ali: Someone kill me now. *deadpan expression on her face*

Fred: Making new friends I see Ali? *smirks*

Ali: shut up you little weasel. *shadows loom over her*

Noya: Finally Tanaka is getting some!! *claps*

Tanaka: ALI-CHAN, I LOVE YOUUU

Ali: Too bad.

Asahi: Poor Tanaka...when will he realize this girl absolutely hates him?

Tsukishima: I don't think he ever will.

Tadashi: We need to save him! Wait...how do we make a guy fall out of love?

Me: I don't think any of you guys are qualified to answer that question.

Fred: Little baldie, do you think you have a chance with Ali? Because I came here to win her over you know!

Tanaka: WhAT DID YOU JUST SAY?? *lunges at him*

Emma: WEEOOO WEEEOOO FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

Daichi: STOP TANAKA!!! *tries to yank him off of Fred*

Ali: Absolute idiots.

[Ali presses the publish button as Tanaka continues to beat Fred up. Oh, and the end credits are now rolling.]