Schizophrenia Love

Love on the brain

Walking with beauty was so much fun, She was really a cool person. I really wanted to tell her more about my personal life but I didn't want her to think that I was a freak. Lately I haven't been taking my medicine. Im slowly trying not to be on drugs. Yes, I still here voices I just try to ignore them and keep pushing. So today Im having a good day. I can tell beauty about to dish something out.

"What you about to say crazy, said vanity?"

"Gurl dont do me? Naw, so you and my cousin been getting super close. You know I heard lil baby."

Damn girlie why you so noisy pooh you lucky you my friend. Them other bishes couldnt know the tea.

"Cause you my fav that' s why. I would not  want no one but you with my cousin." I said that from day one. 

I just feel like something is going to go wrong. Everything going was going good. I was in deep thought. I could not stop thinking about Kai. Yes I know you wondering if  I ever had a boyfriend before. So, your answer is no and yes. I remember talking to this boy back home but nothing like this. We basically just talked on the phone. Every time I am  in deep thought kai walk up. It so crazy I hope he never see me.  Cause I know  he would think I'm  crazy.

"Hey beautiful."

I hate when he calls me beautiful it makes me soo shy. I always blush. You see deep down within I'm  really shy. I'm  so insecure  it crazy. I sometimes want to feel beautiful and not second guess myself.

Hey you. What is  going on? "You good?  Look like you in deep thought,  you okay boo? Remember you can tell me."!

Yeah.

One day you can trust me love. You will see I am not  like those other niggas. You got a real one. You done came up. I know you just do not  want to trust anyone. I feel the same way. But just know being loyal is so important to me.

Dang I guess you believing in dream? Nothing wrong with believing. Bae you conceited af . I'm saying your confidents all the way on the roof top. Its okay love,  you got that border up. I understand I need a whole freeway up.

Come here girl,  come get me a kiss stop ,playing with your  future nigga. I remember that kiss. Stop playing with me.

I had to think to self what he was talking about. Then I  remember that I did  kiss him. I had totally made the first move. He probably think I am  a hoe. I was so mad that I did that . Too be honest i do  not  even know why I did those actions. We did not  even go on our first date. Here I was being a lil rachett. I did not  know how to react  after what he said. I tried  to stand there and look pretty.