Out Of Control !

Feelings !

     "I am the son of a cheat .... "

( Jacob's POV )

I looked at the cloudy dark sky  , growing darker every minute . It's only 3: 47 am in the morning . Everything is quiet and still . Just few hours ago it was not so quiet , my father came back at past 12 , drunk , tipsy . He caused a rampage and took out his anger on the house , dishes , chairs , doors and many more . It took him sometime to cool down . It is very common for me , I have been witnessing this since 7 !  I waited for him to go inside his room and then came out and cleaned up the place . 

" Nya " a little kitten brushed itself against my leg as if trying to soothe me . I brought it home few days ago , I found it alone , weak in the corner of a road . It reminded of me . I opened the fridge and poured some milk into a bowl and gave it to him . He immediately started licking it with his pink tongue . My mother and father got married when they were 18 . They dated each other since high school. And soon they had me . It was all good until I turned 5 . My mother divorced my father , because she didn't like him anymore . " You are not enough for me anymore , it's not like before . I have found myself a better man , who can satisfy me " she said and soon married a rich man . My father found out that she was nothing but a cheat , she had lived and cheated plenty men before him . she was so expert in this that father never understood her real intentions . It was a shocking thing for me too . As much I knew my mother , she was a young , beautiful , kind lady who always smiled gently at me . But behind that smile was her real face , ugly and selfish . After she left my father's heart broke . He was angry as well as sad , she took everything away from him and left him all alone . He didn't came out of his room for like 2 weeks , didn't talk , didn't eat . My grandmother heard about this and came over. 

One day he finally came out , I was standing in front of the door eagerly with a little smile . He came out pale , his face lost his smile and brightness , his eyes didn't sparkle like before . All that could be seen in his face was hatred . He looked at me , and I don't exactly know why he tried to kill me . If it was not for grandma , I could have been dead for a long time . For the first time in my life I had never been so scared . My grandmother hugged me close and I didn't face or saw father for like 2 days . He started to hate me. He even refused to call me his own son . Every night he used to come home late , drunk and cause a rampage in the house and then lock him up in his room and cry .Even my grandmother couldn't do anything , he was broken mentally . 

I used to envy all the other kids , who used to have fun with their parents , got all the love and care they ever wanted . They were so happy . Few years later my grandmother left me too . She died of a heart attack . And from then I was on my own . My father never cared or thought about me , he always got angry whenever he saw me , because I resemble my mother a lot and it used to remind him of her . I had to take care of myself . I didn't know many things but the situation forced me to learn , it taught me how to live on my own  . I never  made  any friends because I could never trust anyone . The time when a child is supposed to get love and happiness , I didn't get it . That's why I never learned how to express my feelings . I always felt empty inside . Sometimes I think that animals are better than humans , so I used to spend most of my time with stray cats . Staying with them used to give me relief from the stress , I had to bear . 

Then they came in my life . Liam was like a ball of energy , always in a good mood , on the other hand Emily was sweet , and full of love . I don't know myself when I Got so close towards them . All the time I felt lonely , sad and guilty but whenever I was with them all those feelings washed away from me , I felt like I got a new family . I met (y/n) and Amelia some years after . They poured color in my colorless life . 

I finally had a place to call home , my friends are my family and I will do anything to protect my family ! I realised that I have feelings too .......