To My Dearest Friends. (Sanders Sides fanfic)

Part 3

Roman's POV

   I see "Roman LOVES Emo!" On his wrist, and "Roman HATES Emo! On his stomach. I step back and fall to the floor. "Roman, no time to regret. I need you to help Patton lift him up so I can bandage him before he bleeds too much." I pick up the side of him with his head, and Patton picks up his legs.

   Logan bandages him up, and we let him back down. He then fixes his arm up, but the phrase on his arm was worrying me. It was oddly familiar..
"He's still not out of the clear yet, we need to wake him up. There's a possibility that if he stays asleep, his reflex breathing might stop."

  Patton runs to him and takes his hand. "Come on, kiddo! Please wake up. Please, please!" Virgil slowly starts to regain consciousness. Patton gives him a big hug, startling him the whole way awake.

   "Where am I..?" He says. "Your room. I heard a crash from in here, and you were not answering me. Roman broke down the door, and we found you lying on the floor, bleeding out." Logan answers.

   "So you saw.." We all nod and he looks at me and almost starts crying. I can't take it anymore and I walk out, conjuring a new door for him. Through the thin walls, I hear him crying and Patton shushing him, and water running. Most likely Logan washing the rags.

   I lay in bed facing my ceiling, wondering why that phrase was so familiar. I couldn't think of anything, so I eventually fell into a deep sleep.

   When I awoke, I was in Virgil's room, but his old one. From 11 years ago? I see an eight year old Virgil crying on the floor, a book behind him. I look out the door to see ten year old Logan, eleven year old Patton, and..twelve year old me?

   Wait, this is when he got his purpose. What was he doing in here? I don't think he can see me, so I sit on his dresser and watch him panicking. Then he gets up, and I follow him into his bathroom. A man appears, and he doesn't see me either.

  "Aww, look. Nobody loves you anymore. You pathetic little baby."

   "Who are you?" Little Virgil looks at the man.

   "I'm your depression!" He says cheerfully.

   "But I AM a side, I can't have sides!"

   "It's only me, you have no others. Horrible to see how weak you are, you've only been unloved for an hour and you're already depressed! Or were you already?

"I-I don't know?" He says. His little voice hurts my heart.

   "Before I leave, I want you to do something for me. See this razor?" He imagines one and it appears in his hand. "Take it to your wrist. Cut deep lines, it'll take the pain away."

   He disappears and Virgil picks up the razor. He looks around, and cuts one line. Then two, three, he stops at nine. He puts on the jacket that he now wears every day, and he walks out to the commons. I know what's about to happen. I remember it like it was yesterday.

   "What was that?!" Little me screams at him. "What did you make Thomas do?!" He looks at Logan. Logan looks at Roman. "I believe that whenever Virgil has a panic attack, so does Thomas. As soon as Virgil's started, Thomas copied and also panicked.

   "You idiot!" Little me yells at him. "You made him do this!" Young me takes down a decoration we had on a shelf, and throws it at him. It shatters on him and the floor, and he goes back up to his room crying. I try to follow him, but I found myself back in my bed.

   I did this to him. I think. It doesn't matter, I shake off the thought and get up. I walk out to find Logan watching a documentary on flowers, and Patton baking cookies, per usual. I don't see Virgil, but I don't think I can face him right now anyway. I sit and watch with Logan, but I'm mostly still scrolling on my phone.

   -One month time skip brought to you by eating a second cookie-

   Virgil's POV

   It's been a month and nor Roman or Logan have talked to me. I'm starting to give up. Suddenly, there's a rope in my hand. I grab the desk chair and tie the rope in a noose, and tie it to the ceiling.

   "You're so selfish, write a note first."

  Right. I write it out carefully, take off my jacket and place it with the note. I take out two more identical jackets and out them there too, just in case any of them miss me..which they won't. I put my head through the loop, and too late I remember that I didn't lock the door. I kick the chair back and soon I see darkness.

   Patton's POV

   I'm watching the console while making cookies, when Thomas starts acting really stupid. Like..no anxiety stupid. I point it out to the others, and they come with me to Virgil's room. I find the door is unlocked, and as soon as I open it I fall to the floor.

   "Ki-kiddo..?" I say, knowing I'll get no answer. I burst out in tears and Logan runs to try and untie him, and once he's down Logan takes his pulse. He turns back to me where im lying on the floor and Roman is standing there, crying. He turns his head, I see tears in his eyes. He shakes his head no, and we all start crying heavier.

   "He's not gone, he can't be gone!" I scream, running over to where the lifeless body lays. "Wake up! Please, just wake up!" I don't realize, but I just start screaming. No words. Just screaming. Logan pulls me out of the room, along with Roman.

   He gestures to himself and Roman. "This is our fault. Not all yours, not all mine. But it's not Patton's, and we both know that." Roman nods, still crying. "This note was on the table." He pulls out a note from his pocket and beging reading.

   To My Dearest Friends...

       I'm sorry that it had to end this way. I couldn't take it anymore. All I do is hurt Thomas and you guys. Please be nice to the new Anxiety. I don't want him to go through what I did. Please don't hit him or yell at him, he was made that way, as was I. Neither of us picked to be Anxiety. We were made this way. I think the reason I was no longer a dark side is because I was needed here. I tried so hard to help, but whatever I did I was always wrong, and I couldn't please you..so I'm sorry for that. There is a box under my bed that has something for each of you, you'll know who's is who's. I left three of my jackets on my table as well, but if you're reading this you know that. You don't have to take them, I just thought you might..maybe..miss me. I'm sorry.
                      
                                                      Sincerely,
                                                           -Virgil

   With the word 'love' I cry into Logan's shoulder, knowing I'll never see my kiddo again.