Anger Issues (Depressed!Deku)

2

'Knock knock'

oh shit, that must be.. 

Todoroki! We were going to study together at 4 today! I slowly stand up, trying to regain my balance.

" Are you alright midoriya?" Todoroki said through the door.

"y-yea! b-be out in a s-second!" 

"ok, I'll be on your bed."

"ok.."

I stumbled over to the sink, to wash my cuts. The cold water stung every red irritated line on my arms. I bandaged my arms and got a wet towel to clean up the blood all over the floor and shower curtain. 

When I was done, I put the towel in the shower, to clean it later. I took off my shirt and put it in the shower with the towel. 

I didn't see any blood on my pants so I left those on. I put my head under the tub faucet and wet my hair. I wrapped my upper half in a towel and opened the bathroom door.

I went over to my closet and grabbed a long-sleeved shirt and a pair of sweat pants. I walked back into the bathroom and closed the door behind me, Todoroki watching the whole time.

"Ok, im done. sorry, I took so long, I was in the bath and forgot you were coming." I smiled at him, hand to the back of my head.

"It's fine Midoriya, let's get started"

I woke up the next morning too- ToDoRoKi!??

He was laying next to me, hugging me close to him.

I should get up and change, but I dont want to wake him up. I slowly slid out from his grasp, going to the bathroom.

I remembered the towel and shirt. Both of them were white so I decided to bleach them, and pour hydrogen peroxide on the blood, just the make sure I gave rid of all of it. 

Then, I put them in the washer and turned it on. I went back upstairs to get dressed only to find an awake Shoto, stretching. 

Oh my god, hes so hot- wait, WaiT, im not gay! yeah, maybe if I say it enough, I won't be gay anymore, and, everyone will like me!

Gay

useless

ugly

fat

mistake 

kill yourself-

"Hey, midoriya."

"what- Oh, Hey Todoroki" I smiled at him.

He hates you.

He wants you to kill yourself, stupid gay-

"what are you doing up so early?" he asked me, getting up to stretch.

"Oh, I always wake up this early," I said, still smiling,

I walked over to my closet to get some clothes.

"why dont you ever wear short sleeves?"

"WaT- Oh-Oh, I-I dont like short sleeves. I normally only sleep in them."

"Oh. Can you wear a short-sleeved shirt today?"

"Oh, Um, I'd rather not.." I said grabbing a shirt from the closet.

"Oh, ok.. I was kinda just wondering what your arms look like since they're never visible."

"... they're nothing special. If you saw them, you would think they're so- I mean, completely normal! Normal arms!" I said smiling.

And with that, I grabbed my things and went into the bathroom.

I got dressed in a Jade green sweater and Black ripped jeans since today was Saturday, I could wear whatever I wanted.

I went over to the mirror and looked at myself.

I looked awful.

Stupid ugly fuckin gay

you know what. stop calling me names. just stop. i-im not ugly, im not stupid, and im- ... I'm gay. A-and I-im going to tell Todoroki-

 ...

 I'll tell him how I feel, a-and if he hates me then, I guess I'll move my death-day, closer.

'Knock knock'

I grabbed my mom's makeup and did my face. I had a green eye shadow on and mascara. 

what was I thinking, I look awful. The voices were right, Im ugly and stupid.. 

"I like it"

I heard someone say from the bathroom doorway. I swung my head around and saw Todo, leaning on the door frame.

"O-Oh todoroki! h-hey! why are you in here?" 

" I knocked and you didn't answer, so I was afraid you left, or got hurt or something."

"Oh.. I'm ok!" I said looking happy.

"You look cute- I MEAN, I mean COOL! You look cool midoriya. I love your make-up, and outfit, you- BOO, I meant Boo! boo bitch! be scared!"

"Are you ok?"

"yeah, I'm fffine."

"Oh, Um Todoroki, I have something to tell you.."