Outlines of Peddicret

Goodbye and hurt

'Well this didn't go the way I hoped.' I said with a sore throat as we walked back to the beginning of the forest. That witch got a firm grip, damn it. 'I still don't know what to expect of the treasure. What if it was something so heavy I couldn't lift it, or maybe something I would want for myself?' 'Emmy, remember to take the treasure to the witches. Don't keep something for yourself, I know you have a feeling for it.' Gray fox said with a low, strict voice. For the devils love, I can't even think without someone leaving me alone.

Before I knew it we were standing next to the road. I looked around me and was surprised we already were at the edge of the woods. What the f*ck happened? My legs weren't tired, was this a spell? I guessed my thoughts had control over me and I lost track of time. As I said goodbye to gray Fox and Orson I heard an engine start, Caldwin. Gray Fox called him, man if I wasn't angry at this point I sure was now.

'Hi. Hi.' that was the only thing we said when we saw each other. 'Didn't you read my text today? Asking you to tell me that you are okay. You were such a mess last night, don't think I didn't see it. this work is changing you, I don't like it. Leona even texted me you didn't give her a ride home, that she had to walk. Walk, Emmy? Walk.' Caldwin spoke calmly. 'For the love of god Caldwin. I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for working and for being too tired to drive my friend back to her place. Why do you two even text? About such a piddling subject. I just had to go to the witches, I can't take part in an argument with you right now.' I said with sleeping anger in the back of my mind. 'You never have time for me, or to talk to me. I'm always number two in your world. I'm worried about you.' Caldwin said with tears in his eyes. 'Worried? WORRIED?' I shouted. 'Everybody is worried about me, why? I'm I such a stupid person, do I only make bad decisions? Why does everybody question me?' I started crying. 'AND YOU! YOU ARE LEAVING ME FOR THIS BASIC BIMBO BECAUSE SHE IS THERE FOR YOU! WE BOTH KNOW IT'S ONLY MAKE BELIEVE!' I screamed. My voice died as soon as the worst anger left my body and said: 'Please, f*ck off Caldwin.''.

I felt a strong force around my throat. The car had stopped and Caldwin had turned to me. He grabbed my throat just so I would shut up. 'Now you listen to me. I just want to hate you for things you always say to me, but I can't. I know how your mind ticks and I respect that. Now just respect me and see why I made this choice. I'm just f*cking sick of it. Sick of you pushing me away, sick of you pretending we don't have a future. My only hope was for you to really care, you can't. So I move on.' he said while his grip tightened. 'P-p-please loosen your hand. I, I, I can't breathe.' the word fell out of my mouth while I gasped for air. Caldwin looked at his hand, his eyes couldn't believe what he saw and anxiously withdrew his hand. He gave little gas and the car drove off. We didn't say anything the whole way home. As I looked over my shoulder I saw my flat building. The car stopped and Caldwin turned off the engine. 'I only came because the Gray Fox called me and I need to pick up my last stuff.' he said with a painful voice. 'I changed my mind, you know. Sorinna and Leona pushed me to go to your wedding. So I will.' I said with a whispering voice. Caldwin didn't look at, he just stared towards the front window. He signed and stepped out of the car.

We walked up the stairs, not talking, just an awkward silence. As we walked into my apartment I saw the dining table set. He waited for me, even spared a thought for me. It felt like broken dreams and hurt feelings. I walked past it and made way for the bedroom. As I walked into the bedroom, a strong arm blocked the way. I stumbled and looked next to me. 'I don't want us to part ways with anger, fighting.' Caldwin said with a black sadness in his tone. 'Too late. I can't pretend we are okay, you almost killed me back in the car. Sometimes, I just wish I could forget how we can be. Believe the sweet words you use to soften my thoughts. Next to you, I feel like I'm having the sweetest dream, nobody can touch me. But you can and you do.' I felt my voice couldn't keep up. 'Times have changed, don't you remember the good times?' he asked with a gentle voice. I replied: 'Don't you remember the hard times? Don't you remember the black eyes, broken ribs or the times you disappeared into the woods? Caldwin, time didn't heal all wounds. Therapy changed you for the better, but choking me in the car brought up a bunch of memories.'. Silence filled the air. We always had a rocky relationship, you already know. It wasn't only emotional, we would get physical as well. Many fights had ended with broken ribs or black eyes. Like I said in the beginning, he is a magnificent beast, but a beast will always be a beast. With two strong minds and his anger there was no way this wouldn't end in disaster. I felt afraid, confronting him with our past. In front of me a fist tightened, an arm started showing muscles. Next to me heavy breathing. The last thing I heard was the front door.

I fell to the floor, hurt took control over my body. I cried and my body shocked as I couldn't breathe. I knew we weren't a good match, we were the mistakes we needed to learn from. I just loved him so much, more than my own existence. After I drowned myself in self pity I grabbed my phone and called Sorinna. 'Sorinna? It's me, I'm sorry. I really need you to go on a mission with me.'. Silence. She had picked up the phone, but didn't say a word. At last, she said: 'Pff, ok, you're lucky I'm bored. Where are we headed?'. 'The beginning of hell.' 'Ohw shit, I take it back, I don't want to go with you. I have so many things to do. Ohw my, look at the time.' she acted. 'Sorinna, you already said yes, I know you're lying right now. We leave after the wedding.' Waiting call. I secretly hoped to hear Caldwin. 'Hello?' I answered with a soft voice. 'SO YOU ARE GOING TO THE GATES OF HELL WITHOUT ME? I'M OFFENDED. HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO ME?!' Leona cried on the other side off the phone. I signed, but she could be useful on this mission. 'You're not work related, so obviously I didn't call you. You are welcome to join us.'. 'Do I feel lucky, because already I am standing in front of your building.' Leona replied awkwardly. I ran to the window, opened it, looked down and saw a ghost lady waving at me. I could only shake my head. I closed the window and tipped the buzzer to let her in.

She entered my apartment and took a seat. 'We leave after the wedding. Still need to see with my own eyes that he chose her.'