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xv. look what you did

CHAPTER FIFTEEN.
[ xv. look what you did ]
/ IRL /

HANJI WENT BACK into the kitchen, mentally and physically exhausted. They sat down at the table. "How long did it take you to use the bathroom?" Ymir jokes harmlessly, making Hanji confused.

"Huh?"

"You said you had to use the bathroom. Took you 20 minutes," Ymir informed, making Hanji nod. Guiltiness and despair started to overcome them.

"Yea . . . yea the bathroom," Hanji let out a nervous smile. They rubbed their aching hands and cleared their throat. They were guilty, very guilty. Everyone in the room could feel Hanji's uneasiness.

"You okay Hanji?" Marco asked as he bit the inside of his cheek. They gulped and started sweating. Hanji Zoe could never keep their mouth shut.

"I killed her," Hanji muttered, not making eye contact.

"What?" Marco asked, wanting to know what they said.

"I said I killed Rico!" They shouted as they stood up. Everyone looked shocked. "Th-The guy made me, okay?! Rico is dead because of me! She knew exactly how to defeat this shit, but we will never hear it because of me! Someone will never ever see the light of day and it's all because of me!" Hanji shouted, tears running down their face. "I'm just as bad as the dick behind this!"

"How do you think I feel, Hanji?" Eren asked, getting down from sitting on the counter and walking towards them.

"Wait, Rico is dead?" Armin asked softly in disbelief. Nobody heard him, though.

"I have to live with innocent people dying every second of my god-forsaken life. Because of one click I made," Eren explained sternly. "Multiple people are dead because of me, Hanji."

"She's not dead," Armin whispered to himself, shaking his head.

"Well, I'm not like you, Eren. I can't go to bed knowing someone else's blood is on my hands. I'm not a psychopath like you," Hanji scoffed as they wiped their tears.

"How do you think I feel, Hanji?" Sasha asked, walking forward. "I killed my best friend. Someone hates me for it, and I deserve it. She had been there for me through thick and thin, and I was selfish enough to take her life instead of mine. You don't understand how badly I wanna die because of it. You will never understand."

"Hanji!" Armin screamed, catching everyone's attention. He slowly stood up, still somewhat recovering from that stab wound that wasn't fully healed. "Tell me . . . you did not kill Rico." Armin got closer to Hanji, looking them dead in the eyes. "Tell me God dammit!" Hanji jumped and looked away. "Tell me you didn't kill her!" Armin started hitting Hanji's chest. "You did not kill her! You didn't! You wouldn't stoop that low because you're human and you have feelings! You wouldn't kill someone, especially Rico! The only friend I had!" With every single word, Armin hit Hanji's chest. Harder and harder each time. Armin felt arms grab him and pull him back, not letting him hit Hanji anymore. "She did nothing to you! Nothing! You're horrible Hanji Zoe!" He screamed, tears running down his face. He realised Ymir and Levi were holding him back and Armin jerked out of their grip. "And you Sasha, you're horrible too! Christa did nothing to you, absolutely nothing! She deserved better than you, and so does Connie," Armin exclaimed, making Sasha emotional.