𑁍︎Tᴇᴀʀs𑁍︎

Look, Im Sorry.

Bokuto felt really bad. He didn't mean to make his best friend cry. He decided to check up on him.

***

Bokuto and Akaashi's Chat

Bokuto: Hey Akaashi...

Akaashi: Hello Bokuto-san!

Bokuto: W-Wow... You feel really energetic.

Akaashi: So, what's up?

Bokuto: Look, Im Sorry.

Akaashi: It's Okay, Bokuto-san. I was just in a bad mood this morning. I'm supposed to be the one saying sorry. I ruined practice...

Bokuto: You didn't really ruin my day. I got myself a girlfriend! She is so pretty! That girl Kira is my world!

Akaashi: I understand your feeling, Bokuto-san.

Bokuto: UWOH??? YOU'RE INLOVE??

Akaashi:...

Bokuto: 'Kaashi?

Akaashi: Why the fuck are you texting Akaashi?

Bokuto: I'm sorry, but, who is this?

Akaashi: It's me bro.

Bokuto: BRO! KUROBRO!

Akaashi: Look. Give Akaashi a break.

Bokuto: Huh??

Akaashi: He doesn't really want to speak to you. Okay? Thanks.

Bokuto: WHAT??

Akaashi: Are you deaf bro? GIVE HIM A BREAK.

Bokuto: WHY?

Akaashi: Right now, he is suffering. He doesn't want any contact with you for a few days. So please, leave him alone for a while.

Bokuto: What happened? AND WHY ARE YOU TWO TOGETHER?? AREN'T YOU AND KENMA DATING??

Akaashi: I am here because he is in my house with Kenma.

Bokuto: Oh... I see! Well, tell him I was sorry!

Message was not sent. This user has blocked you ❌

***

"Thank you Kuroo-san, but is it really necessary to block him?" I said while holding back tears.

"Well... We don't know how we will fix this... You might die, you know? We can't really do that." Kuroo-san said.

Did he really mean that? Does he actually care? I am a person who deserves to die. I don't want to ruin Bokuto-san's relationship for me to become happy.

"Hey. Stop thinking like that."

"What? Kuroo-san, what are you talking about?"

"I used to make that face. Kenma used to hang out with this girl and I thought they were dating. What you're thinking right now is what I was thinking about before."

"He is straight, not gay. How will I deal with this?"

"Take the surgery, Akaashi. Take it or you'll die."

"...uhm. Surgery? For what?"

"It's take the surgery and forget everything you had with Bokuto, or you'll die."

"I wanna die."

"AKAASHI!"

"YOU CAN'T JUST EXPECT ME TO FORGET ABOUT HIM! ARE YOU CRAZY?!"

He gives a loud sigh as he sits down on the floor leaning on the couch while Kenma was upstairs sleeping. He didn't want to wake Kenma up with all these arguments with the surgery. He then starts sobbing as he looks up to the ceiling.

"K-Kuroo-san..."

"I... Just don't wanna lose you..."

"Out of all people... Why do you not want to lose me...?"

"Akaashi. You are one of my friends too, you know? There are still some stuff in my life that I want to enjoy, with Kenma and you. You two are something I treasure. Akaashi, we were best friends before and we are still now. Even you and Kenma are really close. How do you think me and Kenma would react if you die?"

"I... Have to go..."

"Wait! AKAASHI!"

Just like that. I left. Not thinking for even a second. I ran. I ran like there wasn't any time left. There wasn't any time. No time left.

I opened the door to my house to see my mom.

"You're back Keiji! Welcome back home! What took you long?"

"I just went to a friend's house. Thanks for worrying about me though, Mother."

A man came behind me. He was my father. My hardworking father.

"Welcome back home father." I said with a smile hiding my pain. Hiding the one reason I could die.

"You too son."

Me and my dad went upstairs to our respective rooms. I went into my room and looked at it.

Boring. As always. Soon enough, this place will be forgotten. Not long though. Wait, I don't even know how long I would be alive? What?

I went to my bathroom and took my prized possession. My sharp blade. I had this for over 2 years now. Ever since I discovered my dad's condition, I was never the same. My grandparents died. They were something special to me. My parents were working non-stop that it's unhealthy. My insomnia keeps me awake. Insecurities circle in my head.

I take the blade and slide it across my skin.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8..... 12 cuts on both my arms. You need to treat everything equally, you know? That's what my teachers said.

You must treat everything equally.

I put on some long sleeves and shorts. Kind of a weird choice, but it works.

I went downstairs and took in the delicious smell. Delicious, but not enough to make me hungry.

We all sat on the table and thanked for the food. My mom and dad started eating. I just stared at my food.

"Hun, aren't you gonna eat?" My mom said.

"Oh, uhm, I ate with my friends already. You can have it. I can see that father is really starving."

I stood up and drank a few glasses of water. I didn't want to eat. I felt like Bokuto-san would want someone with a perfect body. Someone like her. I feel like he thinks of me as if I was fat. I wanted to loose weight. So I just fill myself with water instead of food.

I would eat only a little bit. I have this notebook to measure the calories I take everyday.

I went upstairs and into my bedroom. I looked out my window. It was peaceful. The moon shining over the neighboorhood, the stars happily twinkling, the breeze is the right amount of coldness, but all of this will disappear. I won't see this anymore.

All I would see was the painful black sorrows of my mistakes. As I take all my memories of Bokuto-san. He was something special. Someone that changed me. Someone that I love.

Someone who doesn't love me back.

A/N
Hey guys! Thanks for all the support! This book is almost to it's end! Please tell me your thoughts!

Please be patient. This story will soon be complete.