March 31st 2012...
I watched the clock as it changed slowly. I already knew what I was going to wear and how I was going to put my make up on.
The digital clock that sat on my night stand finally reached the time that I was suppose to get up '2:30 am' I wanted to be sure my parents were sleep before I left. I was usually good at sneaking out though so I wasn't that worried.
I put on my Blood on the dance floor shirt and some black skinny jeans, and my black converse. Did my makeup and grabbed my lighter and a new box of L&M cigarettes from the twelve pack in the closet. After I lit up one and put the newly opened box in my bra, I quietly but smoothly opened the window and climbed out, cracking the window slightly behind me .. I used my phone light to guide me into a small opening into the woods leading to a train track. I walked the train track a while until I found the opening to my schools parking lot and waited for a car to pick me up and take me to the party as planned.
As I opened the door to the backseat of the car I looked to see If I saw a familiar face...
"Hey, uhh can I smoke in here.?"
" yeah I don't care" He said looking back at me
We rode in silence as I lit one cigarette after another, anxious about tonight. Chaz invited my to this party or 'small get together.' And I figured since I was free and would be bored out of my fucking mind that I would go..
After I got out of the car and walked fast like up to the house I could already hear the music.
"Have fun" he chuckled.
I just looked back at him and laughed and thanked him for the ride.
I knocked on the door and after a brief second of thinking of who might be in there...Some random intoxicate guy that I have never seen before opened the door.
" Book club is down the street bitch." he said trying to hold his eyes open.
" hey.! Jason, she's with me" Chaz yelled from up the stairs. I laughed and pushed the asshole standing in front of me to the side. I turned around and looked at him...
"who is the bitch now..?" and with that I ran upstairs to where Chaz was hanging with four other guys. There were about 7 people total in the house.
"alright, fuckers.. time to pull the big guns" a guy yelled pulling out five blunts..
Everybody came running upstairs as fast as they could without falling.
" okay now Chaz has a special request for him and his lady" he said handing Chaz two of the perfectly rolled blunts.
" thanks bro." Chaz said slurring his words together.
Chaz turned to me and whispered in my ear " hey, uhh do you wanna go to a different room.?"
" yeah let me just go get a drink really quick"
I stood up from the couch pulling my shirt down and running down stairs. When I reached the drinks there were many choices on the table.
I choose vodka mixed with a little fruit punch, I actually ended up drinking three cups before I went back upstairs with my fourth cup.
When I got back upstairs Chaz was already standing up waiting for me to get back.
" oh hey babe, where you been" He said kissing my neck. I let out a soft moan..
"ha ha, those drinks took some time to make" I grabbed his hand with my free one.
"here ya go baby" He put one of the blunts behind my ear, trying to be sexy.
" Hold on" I laughed before drinking the rest of my half filled cup of goodness.
After I put the empty cup down I put the blunt in my mouth and pulled my lighter out of my bra and lit it, Chaz led me to a bedroom.
" so how did you find out about this party" I asked closing the door, so there wouldn't be an awkward silence.
" my buddy Tony invited me yesterday, and he said if you came he would hook me up." he said hiding his high behind a serious face.
" oh, okay" I smiled at how serious he was.
" he didn't think you would come ha ha... he hates sharing his weed." He laid on the bed and I took my place and laid my head on his chest, almost done with my blunt. I got up and cracked the window taking my last hit and trowing it out and turning the light off. I laid back on the bed except this time next to him. We spent the next 5 minutes looking and smiling at each other in the dark, I was gone.
He made the first move by kissing me, it gradually turned into a make out session. And before I knew it he was on top of me.
I broke away from the kissing " Chaz"
" its okay" he said still trying to kiss me.
" I'm not okay right now and your not okay right now, a-are you sure we shou- we should.." He was kissing my neck. He knows that when he kisses my neck I get horny, it was a cheep shot that he uses all the time. After a while of kissing I started taking my close off.
" wait, Ivy.." He said slowly pulling away.
" what.?" I said trying to pull him closer to me.
" I-I don't have a condom." he said looking at me. Almost saying it like it was a question.
Of course, with me not thinking I said it was okay "its fine Chaz" I really wanted him, right then and there..
After we got done I put my clothes back on and grabbed my box of cigarettes and put one in my mouth, not lighting it yet. Then slid the box back into my bra.
Before he opened the door he gave me a quick kiss on the forehead and told me he loved me.
" I love you too." I said as he grabbed my hand squeezing it.
When he opened the door a couple guys ran from the door. And everybody looked over a threw us a grin.
" ha ha all ya'll need to shut the fuck up" Chaz said like a black guy. Not being able to control his high.
I went to go sit next to a guy who was passing around a bong. And did a couple rounds of that, then slid down the stairs because I knew I was to messed up to walk down them. I walked to the kitchen where Chaz was and sat on his lap.
" hey lil mama.. want some" some guy said passing me a needle.
"depends what it is..?" I said with curiosity and fear in my voice.
" heroine, and don't worry boo..the needle isn't used" He said showing six other needles, so that I didnt think he was lying.
From what I know heroine is bad for you but an amazing high. I looked and him then the needle for a while.
" yeah sure" I looked back at Chaz and he looked pissed.
Not making a big deal out of it he lined everything up and injected the needle into my vein. At this point everything slowed down, my body became very limb. I had gotten up off of Chaz's lap to ask the owner of the house if I could smoke some cigarettes in his house before I lit the one I put on the table before I tried this new stuff that was now flowing through my body at a rapid motion... Before I fell unconscious onto the living room floor after trying to stand up, the last thing I remember was me calling Chaz's name..
