Him or me ?

Cant blame u🤷‍♀️

I wake up and get over a million notifications and there about Marc and desi🤦🏻‍♀️I see that Three of us are on tiktok room and it's saying that I've bin played avani sends me a vid and says "I'm so sorry pretty girl"and this is the video I see🥺

I start to cry and I walk out of the hotel room and I have my suit cases with me I see all the boys outside and Marc coming towards me I push him away and start walking Julian grabs my hand and I tell him to get off me he dosnt listen so I say"GET THE FUCK OFF ME JULIAN"they all ask why I'm mad I say"WHY AM I MAD"I pull out my phone and show them the video Marc try's to explain but then I say"that's why y'all were acting mad weird yesterday Marc was over there kissing another bitch and u guys were covering him huh? Julian says"no uh we weren't"I say"so ur all gonna tell me marc hasn't kissed her ?"they all look at me and Marc grabs my waist and I push him off me I say"I thought I actully had friends that cared about me I thought that u guys had my back"Jude comes out the room and says"why r y'all yelling?"I say"oh because ur little friends have bin covering Marc for kissing another bitch"he says"I didn't"I say"this is bullshit"and burst out crying Marc grabs my cheek and says"I'm sorry it was a mistake I love you princess"i say"u promised u wouldn't hurt me"I throw my phone across the room and it shatters I say"all of u get the fuck away from me"Jude comes close to me and hugs me"I say"I can't...I can't"I start to fall but he catches me and hugs me I don't hug back and at this point I don't feel anything😔I feel empty Jude grabs his stuff and he leaves with me and he pulls me close I try and leave but he said"hear them out for me?"I say"7 minutes"we go into there hotel room and they all explain Im not ever gonna forget about what Marc did but he was so called"drunk"i say"u know what guys don't even wore ya bout it u guys got what u wanted right I mean I feel empty I feel like a peace of shit and I feel stupid but yk u were so called"drunk"okay I'm done here and I'm done with this Marc if it wasn't clear enough but we're over and yeah guys we're all cool don't worry bout it"I hug everyone exept Marc and I say"y'all coming to my 15 right Nd y'all still my chambalnes"they all said"okay"I walked out of the door but then Marc pulled me close and kissed me I pulled back and pushed him away I said"Marc what are you doing"Jude comes and pulls me behind him and Marc says"that kiss with dess didn't mean anything princess I promise"I say"look marc I forgive u I'm not finna be the type of person to hold any grudges ur still invited to my sweet 15 and we can still hangout nothing more then that"I see a tear fall down his eye and I hug him tight and say"I'll always be here if u need me"I let go and I leave Marc,avani,Jude come with me I don't really care anymore we got on the plane and we got home and I forgot me and Marc share a room I fall in the bed and wish I can just sink in it marc comes in and he lays next to me we stay silent I decided that I was gonna change my style I threw most of my clothes and then went to the mall to shop for a lot more I finished and I got a lot of stuff I organized it in the closet and took a shower I changed into this

And I go to the bathroom I feel weird and I throw up I hold my hair back and I throw up marc walks in and he sees me he quickly runs over to me and touches my waist he hugs me I wash my face and get out of the bathroom I lay on the bed and turn my lamp off I feel a warm hands around me and i turn around and it's Marc I pull away and I turn around he pulls me closer to him and my butt is touching his u know what he wraps his arms around me and I say"Marc?"he says"yeah"I say"I wonder what it would've bin like if u didn't cheat"he turns the lamp on and I look down he grabs my chin softly and I look at him and he says"princess u mean the world to me that kiss that me and dess had ment nothing I'm sorry that I hurt u I didn't mean to kiss her I was drunk and I wasn't thinking straight the only girl I want is u and the only girl I want to kiss is u"I look at him and tears fill my eyes I say"Marc I love you so much and I know u we're always there for me but I honestly didn't think u would do that to me I thought u were the one person that wouldn't hurt me but I mean u did"his eyes started filling with tears I place my hands on the sides of his cheeks and I look at him and say"I..I still love you"Marc says"give me one more chance please I swear I won't hurt u again"I say give me some time Marc" he comes closer to me and he places his hands on my thigh and he says"I love u so much and I will never stop loving u"I get up and go to the bathroom and I start to feel alone I come back to the bed and fall on the bed I just sit there and think marc gets up and stands in front of me.....