Why do you want to be a hero, even when you're quirkless?

Chapter 3 - I WILL Make Things Right

Katsuki's POV:

  Why am I so mean to him, when did things go so wrong? I know we were best friends at one point, I always thought we would become heroes together. When the damn nerd was deemed quirkless, I was just flushed with so many emotions, anger, sadness,... fear? Why would I be scared?

  These are questions I've been dealing with for the past ten years.

  Only recently have I figured out the answers, our friendship was so messed up at the age of 4, when he found out he was quirkless. As for why, everyone instantly turned away from him. They looked the other way when he needed help, myself included. I was so focused on myself that I couldn't see him truly suffering, he always wore a bright smile that shone through any darkness. But nobody saw it, or payed any attention to the beaming ray of happiness sitting right there.

  When we were kids, the other shitheads thought it would be funny to pummel Izuku, since he never said anything or fought back, they all thought they could get away with it. I knew they would do the same to me if I would've protected him. And that's where everything went to shit.

  I would boast about being able to take down anyone, and they looked at me like a god. And by they I mean my "friends", they're not really my friends. I don't even know their names, nor do I give a crap. It felt good to be on top, it soon became a habit of mine. Being the pompous, arrogant bastard type of person I despise and beating down on Izuku. I became what I absolutely hated, whilst my outside wore a confident smile, my insides churned with feelings I could't stand.

  Anger at myself for becoming this person out of habit. Sadness that I could only watch as my best friend started to drift away from me, and I was the one who caused this. Fear that I would become the new punching bag and an even more intense fear that I may lose Izuku forever. But there's something stirring in me, it just makes my heart jumpy. I hate that I don't know what to call this and I loathe that it's making me question everything I've known about myself up until this point.

  "If you want to be a hero that badly, there's a quick way to do it. Believe that you'll be born with a quirk in your next life and take a swan dive off the roof"

  Those words still make me sick to my stomach, why would I ever encourage suicide? Has it really become such a habit that I've run out of insults and cruel things to say. Has this fuckery become so heavy that I now ruined the last chance I have to make things right between us? As I was walking home, my dumbass "friends" following me. I've grown tired of them at this point, in my frustration I lose focus and everything goes blank at this point. All I remember is coming back to reality with an ugly eyeball in front of me, a villain. The assholes behind me running away like the cowards they are, me on the other hand, I'm not a coward. Except I'm not strong enough, this slimy bastard now has me hostage and in the depths of my despair, I ask myself one question.

  Would Deku want me to suffer as much as he has?

  Just as I ask myself this, a tuft of green hair enters my peripherals. Damn it Deku, you shouldn't be trying to save the one person who you hate the most. After the whole ordeal, I blow up. Not literally but the heroes needed to hear the truth, they were useless, Deku was the only hero out here. Other than that vigilante but that's not important. I have the opportunity to show Izuku what my heart has been longing to say, I just need to get him alone.

  Now that I've shown him my heart I WILL make things right. I will never stop supporting him and his dreams, I will never lay a hand on him again unless it is to comfort him when he's spilling waterfalls, I will always be by his side. We can be the Wonder Duo we always dreamt of, me as the number one hero and Deku as my number one sidekick. If I was going to be anyone's sidekick, it would be for him. Not some basic bitch extra that only got where they were because of shitty approval ratings.

A/N
This is just an update on what Kacchan has felt within this whole story. I haven't decided what the main ship is with Izuku, so any of you BakuDeku shippers out there, don't get your hopes up. I love it as much as the next thirsty ho, I just want to see how this story evolves.