What We Wanted...

CHAPTER 16

"Let's go." Jax says as he grabs my arm dragging me out of my library.

We slowly stroll through the corridors on the second floor and stop in front of my fathers office doors. Who had come home about a two days ago.

We walk in and he is sitting at his large hardwood desk. Jax and I walk slowly and sit in the two seats in front of his desk and look up at him.

His dark hair is slowly turning grey and his dark blue eyes showing an emotion I'm yet to decipher. I look at his desk and see a small frame that has his wedding photo to our biological mother.

His eyes were full of so much happiness as he looked down at her, he has a smile on his lips that showed his dimples. As he held our mother around her waist. She looked extremely happy as she looked at the camera. I had to admit I looked a lot like her. Except with longer wavier hair she had a small wavy bob. Same pale green eyes and same lips.

They were high school sweethearts and made it though the long four separation during there college years. After he came back to Vegas from college in LA, he proposed to her and got married. We were conceived on there wedding night.

When my mother died after giving birth to me, since I was younger, he went to a dark place. After he married Kayla he seemed to be getting happier, he would tell us stories of him and moms wild adventures as teenagers. Well mainly because Kayla said it was better we knew who our mothers was.

After almost 16 years of marriage to Kayla everything went downhill from there. And well the rest is history.

I looked at my father and watch as he finishes filing some papers, he finally looks up at us with tired eyes.

"I have something important to tell you." He says, looking both of us sadly.

"Well spit it out." I'll admit it was a little harsh of me but I guess remembering all those times made me a little hostile.

"I will be living for the next 12 months, I have left 2 billion in each of your accounts for personal use, and 2.3 billion for college, with Elena." He says.

"Dad what's going on." Jax asks looking a little concerned.

"Just know that if I'm not back in the next 12 months my lawyers will be here with some paperwork for you to sign, I will be leaving the company in your hands. It will be split 50-50." He says looking at me this time, a unrecognizable emotion in his eyes.

"What the fuck is going on." I asked actually getting a little concern.

"I want you two to know I love you both, I may not be the best father, but we came here for a new start. I would love to come for your graduation, but I'm not sure what is going to happen. Everything I have done is for you two and take my word when I say I am tremendously sorry for the man I have become over the past few years. And I want everything to change.

Hopefully by the end of this 12 months I will be back and we can fix everything. If not I hope that you can find it deep within your hearts to forgive me." He then took a deep breath and I notice his eyes turning glassy.

He looks at Jax and give him a nod asking him to excuse us.

When Jax is finally gone, he looks at me with a grim expression.

"Alexi..." He said looking directly into my eyes. He only used that name when I was young. When I was still his princess." I want you to know that everything that happened back home is not what it seems, you may hate me however much you want but I am still your father, I did it all to protect you. It will all make sense by the end of these 12 months, but hopefully it will allow you to find it in you heart to forgive me.

I may not have showed it but I love you and your brother. I guess I never showed it because you look like your mother and looking at you made my heart ache. I know all the shit I have done cannot be explained no but it will all make sense and then maybe it will be okay, but if not I want you to know that I love you and Jackson abundantly.

I'm sorry for being a shitty father and not being there for you when you needed me, I'm sorry for closing you out when you did nothing wrong. I'm sorry for making you think you were worthless because I was just hurting. I'm sorry for calling you a whore or slut or anything. I was just upset about your mothers death, and looking at you made upset that she left me.

I'm sorry for abusing your friend a few weeks back. I have talked to Jackson and its obvious he cares about you. I want you to be happy. And hopefully he brings you happiness. Alexi I love you and I want you to know that." He said getting up a walking up to me.

When he stood in front of me I wrapped my small arms around his waist and hugged him. I don't know what compelled me to do it, maybe it was the unshed tears in his eyes or his speech but I did it nonetheless.

During his entire speech I was trying to figure out weather he was lying, but when I looked up into his eyes and saw the sincerity. I broke down, he was my father he raised me even though not in the best ways he was still my father. I never thought my mothers death affected him that much because he got married soon after. I always thought he was okay and just hated my existence. But he was just hurting.

He was the reason I acted so tough I was trying to show him he couldn't break me, but he was the reason I built all these walls around me. It was going to take a while for things to be okay but hopefully we could get there. He was my father and have to admit it, I missed our father daughter moments. I missed him.

I feel another's pair of arms snake around me as well and look to my side to see Jax.

"You can't just have a hug party and don't invite me." He chuckles. We all laugh as his grip on me tightens.

"I'm gonna miss you. I love you guys." He whispers into my hair.

"I gonna miss you too dad." I whisper.