𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘪𝘯'𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘫𝘶𝘮𝘱 𝘯𝘰 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦

STARRY STARRY NIGHT

not requested

you didn't bother to cover your foxhole. you weren't even wearing your helmet. it was balanced beside you, and you were lay down in the hard soil at the bottom of your foxhole. looking up, you noticed that the sky was clear, clearer than you'd expect from a war zone. the stars twinkled and the moon was pale, like a muted lamp in the sky. things really were beautiful, considering you were only a hair's width away from death on most days. tucking your blanket under your chin, you watched as the condensation from your breath caught the light of the night's sky, and twinkled like your own constellation.

you tried to think of the time. what time could it be? if it was 10pm then you'd only been lay here about an hour, if it was 2am, your foxhole buddy was due back anytime soon. it was an odd thing, time, when at war. you become almost as numb to the concept of time as you do to the cold. the cold. you wiggled your toes like doc had taught you, checking you could still feel them. roe was worried about you, though he didn't let it on. everyone was worried about you. you. the person who once lit up everyone's world with your laugh and your smile and those stars in your eyes. starry eyes. that's what they'd call you. now the only stars were up, past the clouds, and the men knew it.

the navy sky was blocked out by a george luz shaped shadow. it was 2am. "hey y/n."
"hey george." you lifted your bum up and shuffled along to make room for him. it was a tight squeeze, but you found it kept the both of you warm. the warmest you'd been in bastogne was clinging to george luz under a thin woollen blanket in that god forsaken foxhole. he hopped down and grasped the blanket instantly. you turned and the two of you lay side by side facing each other. "can't sleep?"
"i was stargazing." you said it so gently you were surprised george had heard it. george just leaned over you, you were so close your noses nearly brushed together and you had to resist the urge to kiss him. as he pulled away, he came back with your helmet. "put it on, y/n." you took it out his hands and complied "why did you take it off?"
why did you take it off? you had no idea really. "it felt freeing."
"well," he gave you that grin, that lopsided grin you came to love so much, "we don't want that pretty head of yours getting hurt now, do we?" you tried to smile as best you could. it came out pained and furrowed.

george ran his calloused hand gently across your cheek. his heart broke as he watched your smile. pulling you into his chest, he started to rub circles into your back. he tilted his head up to the sky. the stars twinkled and george felt himself smiling. they reminded him of your eyes. bright, unsure of themselves, but beautiful none the less. "the stars sure do look pretty." he felt you pull away slightly in order to look at his face. your eyes were glossy with tears. "i hate them." the statement was unexpected to say the least. george wondered if it was anger towards those cosmic beings, or anger towards their association. the reminder of what the men used to call you, and what you used to be. he had grown to love you, and his heart wrenched whenever he saw your broken smile.

"why do you hate them?" he asked softly. he watched as you frowned and thought for a moment. "they're cold. distant. beautiful but you'll never get them back." he felt a pang of guilt. you shivered and sniffled, and he looked into your eyes. if he looked hard enough, he could see the tiny reflections of the constellations in your eyes. "they're unobtainable." your lip trembled as you let the words slip out your mouth. george understood. you'd never been starry eyed again. "when i was a kid," he started, looking at you to check you were listening, "i used to go stargazing all the time. my dad, he got me this telescope for christmas one year and i swear i never left it."

you took the opportunity of george talking about his childhood, looking up at the heavens, to admire his side profile. his brown eyes that were as warm as the warmth he held in his soul, the slope of his nose, the stubble of his beard, the way his hair had started to flop over his forehead. he paused and looked at you. "what?"
"nothing! carry on."
"alright, well..." his voice, his voice was thick like sugar paste, and his honeyed words made you crave the sweetness of his lips. you're in love with him. you couldn't deny it.

you shakily exhaled, and reached for his hand. his fingers rubbed the back on your hand lovingly. his touch palms like sandpaper against yours, and you wondered how they'd feel at the back of your neck. your bare shoulders, your waist. "what's on your mind?" he asked. the question was innocent enough, he meant no harm by it, but it resonated with you in a profound kind of sense. i'm in love with you george. i'm in love with everything you do and everything about you.

you rolled onto your back, and you both stared at the stars, hand in hand. you risked placing your head on george's shoulder, which he welcomed with a hand running though your hair. leaning up, you noticed his eyes were shut. how easy it would have been to just lean up and place your lips on his, but how many consequences you'd have to deal with afterwards.

instead, you opted to huddle  deeper into his chest, and he pulled the blanket around you both. you held it between your fingers, it was thin and woollen and you wondered how the army could expect soldiers to keep warm under these. "george?"
"yeah?" he opened his eyes and looked down on you softly.
"falling asleep shouldn't be this hard, should it?"

george sighed and looked at you. "no. it shouldn't." your lips were blue, but george luz couldn't resist. "y/n..." you looked up to meet his eyes. "can i?" he leaned in and paused, leaving a moment to check he wasn't making a mistake. you leaned up to meet him.

the kiss was raw, the emotions you'd both been holding in the whole time you'd been in the godforsaken forest were pushed out into it. it was still soft though, and gentle, like george was scared of hurting you. like you were fragile. george smiled into it, you no longer had to imagine those hands at the back of your neck, you felt one settle there, the other at your waist. when you both pulled away, you realised you'd been crying through the whole thing. "don't cry, sweetheart." he rubbed your face lovingly. "this world was never meant for someone as beautiful as you."