𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘪𝘯'𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘫𝘶𝘮𝘱 𝘯𝘰 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦

SCRUBBED CLEAN

ANON : Can I request prompt 4. "we need you. i need you." with Carwood Lipton? Thank you!! 🐾💕

carbolic soap reminded you of when you were a child. your mother would sit you in the bathtub and scrub your scalp until her hands were red-raw, and she was rosy cheeked from all that exertion. now a slither of it was all you had been offered, but you took it with grateful and grimy hands. "you finished?"
"not yet!" fort benning was hell, and you were making sure to get all the time you possibly could from your time in the showers. your sergeant stood outside of the doors, guarding you from any peeping toms. if it was anyone else you'd be skeptical, but carwood lipton was a gentleman and he would never invade your privacy. sometimes you wondered if you wished he would, but you would brush that thought out of your head as quickly as it came knocking at the door. fraternising was a no-no. everyone knew that.

the carbolic soap didn't later very well in your hair, and you finally understood why your mother worked up such a sweat. but that sweet feeling of warm water was reward enough, whether your hair was clean or not didn't really matter in the grand scheme of things, because it would be dirty within the next twelve hours. sobel made sure his company were salty— from the sweat or the tears. you could never say you hated him, however. he was cruel, granted, but he made easy company what it was.

you watched as the slightly grimy suds swirled down the plug hole and wondered when you'd stand in a real shower again. maybe you never would, or maybe it'd happen next week. no one could say. war is hell and the few days you'd spent at jump school made you wonder if you really were cut out for the army, never mind the parachute infantry. you rubbed your hair as dry as you could as you thought about the horrible few days you'd spent being of sobel's cruel words, and the biting remarks he would aim your way. you know internally that it would've just been because he didn't like you, but it still hurt your feelings. and your pride. stepping out of the showers, however, you didn't feel like a new person. lipton blinked a few times before remarking: "you're clean."
"thank you." you gave him a genuine smile. "for keeping your eye out."
"my pleasure."

the sun was behind the clouds, and while the other men enjoyed the rowdy PX tent, you opted to lie in your cot quietly for a while. sobel had really put a dampener on your mood and you really didn't feel like smiling now. he'd made you feel useless, as though you would never live up to what the company's standard was. "y/n. hi."
"hey lip."
"you good?" he motioned towards the spot next to you and you nodded, encouraging him lie down next to you. he didn't take your hint however, because he didn't know you wanted him to hold you, and to kiss you like there wasn't another morning. "i'm fine. just..."
"yeah."
you rubbed your arms. "what am i doing here, carwood?"
"what do you—"
"i mean i should just go home now. stop wasting my time. i don't belong here."
"y/n... you do... of course you belong here!"
"i'm never gonna amount to anything—"
"you can't listen to sobel."
you were quiet for a beat, before sighing. "he's my CO. if he doesn't believe in me, who does?"
"us! the company! your company!" he gently reached for your hand. "we need you, i need you. y/n—"
"you need me?"
"yeah. you're a hell of a good soldier, y/n. don't forget it." you forged a smile, covering up the sinking feeling in your gut.

***

the next significant shower you had was in haguenau. the feeling of the grit and mud and grime slipping from your body hadn't lightened you mood as much as you had expected it to. lipton wasn't there with you that time, he was bedridden with pneumonia, but you remembered the feeling of his arms around you, clutching them as you cried. skip and penk, just gone before your eyes. and a shell landed in your foxhole, but it was a dud. who made that decision? god? fate? you didn't know, but carwood hadn't let you wonder, because he was smoking. "i didn't know you smoked."
"i don't." he was visibly shaken, and george was, but you imagined you were too. you stepped out that shower feeling terrible guilt, and sadness for the men who would never know the feeling of cleanliness ever again.

you still decided to pay lip a visit however, he was ill and you wanted to check if there was anything you could do. he was lay on a couch, insisting on 'helping' around HQ. "hey, first sergeant lipton?"
"y/n, hi." he struggled to sit himself up without coughing.
"don't... you'll make yourself— come here." you held his back and pushed him up, cheek to cheek almost. you tried to will yourself not to blush. settling yourself next to him, you smiled softly. "how are you feeling?"
"fine. i'll be right as rain in a few days."
"doesn't sound like it sergeant."
"good job you're not a medic." you exhaled from your nose in amusement, and softly smirked, but not much else. lipton must have sensed your unease because he clasped your hands and smiled. "you're a hell of a fine soldier though, y/n." you could have said something, but you were quiet. lipton had told you that very same thing so long ago, and now it felt as though the same message left a bittersweet aftertaste in your gut. "lucky." you murmured. "i'm just lucky."

***

the most momentous shower you ever had, however was in berchtesgaden. the shower itself was completely uneventful, however as you entered your room to get dressed, lipton walked in on you, almost completely naked. you stuttered before screaming: "i'm NAKED!"
"i know! i'm sorry!" you'd never heard him squeak like that, and in response you burst into laughter. stood outside the door, he asked if you were finished. "yes. you can come in." he was grinning at you sheepishly, and you couldn't stop the smile that spread across your face. "you asked that the first time."
"huh?"
"the first time you looked out for me in the showers."
lipton nodded and grinned. "benning?" you hummed in agreement. in a moment of overwhelming emotion, you felt yourself tearing up. the two of you had come so far from there, and many of those you trained with would never know life without war. "hey, c'mon. dry those eyes, y/n." lipton used his thumb to brush the tears from your cheeks, and you instinctively leaned into his touch. "thank you, carwood."
"for what?"
"not letting me quit that day." he said nothing, just drew you in for a hug and placed a soft kiss to the top of your hair. "i'm glad too."
"yeah?"
"yeah." he held you at arms length. "may i?"
"may you..." you leaned in a little, seeing if you had the right idea.
"yeah." your lips brushed together.
"of course." he pulled you in for a warm and loving kiss.
you'd take that over a shower any day.