Devotion

Dear Mum

As sad as it is, my most cherished memory is when I had just got out of a five hour heart surgery. I passed out from anaesthesia but one hour later I woke up. The groggy feeling in my bones, eyes too heavy to open up and seek my mother's warmth. If i had a mirror , my reflection would probably stare back at me, dazed and disoriented.
The nurses came close and asked what I needed, the noises from their shuffling feet, disrupting the in drop silence in the ICU.  I tried to tell them to call my mom but the tube shoved down my throat painful, a barrier to keep me from screaming my demands. My limbs felt like noodles as I lay there on the bed wishing they could remove it SL I could call out for the one woman who could make me feel at ease. Soon after they removed it I called out in desperation ,"Ma. Where's Ma? I want my Ma?"

The pain had already started, the anaesthetics finally wearing off. My throat ached to no end and the several tubes sticking out of my body blazed with pain. Alerting me of their presence, like parasites attacking themselves to their host.
After struggling and begging for a while my mother finally came in. Her eyes were teary as she looked at me, half glad that I woke up and half sad that I had to go through it in the first place. Yet the state I was in prompted her to ask,  "Are you feeling too bad?" I could hear the worry in her voice even as a newly thirteen year old.
I told her of the pain possessing my body like I was spitting verses in a rap battle. It worked the way I wanted to since she called for the nurses. Three doses of paracetamol later, I was still in a lot of pain so when she asked me what I needed next I told her to sing me a song.

Then she started singing gospels songs from church. Her voice sultry, the idol of comfort. The smile on my face painful bit a taunt to to the pain washing away. And it honestly distracted me from the pain since all I could focus on was her voice. When the pain dulled I would sing with her too my voice croaking and my throat sore yet we did that for most of the night. When I got tired and went silent she would stop thinking I slept but I would tell her to go on.

It's my most cherished because even at my most vulnerable moment in life to date. The love of my mother was there for me. Constantly singing for a whole night just so I could feel better.
All throughout my treatment I never cried. Even when it got painful, I didn't cry since it didn't matter.
My mom was there with me and that's all I would ever need. I love you mom. From the deepest part of my heart and I always will.