Before Us (Kelly Severide Love Story)

It Will Beat Again

"THEY PULL YOU IN TO FEEL YOUR HEARTBEAT, CAN YOU HEAR ME SCREAMING 'PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME'? HOLD ON, I STILL WANT YOU. COME BACK, I STILL NEED YOU"

Severide's P.O.V.

"How is Lewis doing?" Casey rushes over with the rest of Truck, Squad and Boden. 

"She's in surgery" I sigh, not having any more words. 

"Have they said anything?" Boden asks, looking for more information to calm them down and provide some reassurance but I don't have any. 

"It was touch and go in the ambulance" Brett steps in, noticing that I am not in the mood to talk, "she flat-lined but they were able to restart her heart" she informs then, "rushed her to surgery right after" she adds. 

"Now you know all we know" Chilli puts her head in her hands. 

"She is with the best" Boden pats my back before sitting down next to me, "we need to think positive thoughts," I wish it was that easy. "You didn't see her in the ambulance" I point out, "her heart stopped beating" the sound of her flat-lining forever in my memory.

I felt her heart stop beating. 

How can I forget that? 

"But it's beating now" Casey sits down on the other side of me, "let's focus on that" I know they are trying to reassure me, but the only person who can do that is currently in surgery, fighting for her life.

She needs to pull through this.  

"Severide" I look up to see Jess and Ryan racing over. 

Jess throws herself into my arms when I stand up. I can't even imagine how distraught they must feel because I can't comprehend anyone feeling worse than I do right now. 

"Please tell me this is some kind of practical joke" she pleads as we pull out of the hug, "I wish I could" I cough to hide the crack in my voice. 

"So my best friend was really shot!" She exclaims as I sadly nod. 

"How the hell does that happen!" She yells, "she is a damn firefighter for Godsake! Not a policewoman!" Her sadness and worry manifesting as anger.  

"What Jess mean is-" Ryan tries to calm her down, "Jess means what Jess means" she interrupts. "You yelling isn't helping right now" he pulls her to the side, "well can you explain to me how she got shot?!" She questions and Ryan is without words. 

So am I. 

I can't explain how this happened. 

"Exactly" she states.

"Jess" he warns, "I get it Ryan" she sits across from us and Ryan sits next to her. 

"Have you called her mom?" Jess questions, "I thought you called her mom" Ryan replies. "When have I had the time to call her?!" Jess exclaims, "when have I had the time!?" He fires back. 

"You know forget it, I will call her" Jess gets up and walks away. 

"I apologise for her behaviour" Ryan tells us, "when she feels helpless she tends to get frustrated" he explains.

"I get how she feels" that is exactly how I am feeling. 

"I can't even imagine what she is going through" Cruz comments, "yeah, they share the same heart" Ryan sighs, trying to remain strong for Jess. 

"I called her" Jess comes back, "she is going to pick up Henry from school and then catch the first flight out" she returns to her seat, "should be here in a few hours" she leans into Ryan, who wraps an arm around her and pulls her closer.