The Book Thief 》Hemmings A.U

17.00

     I HUG HIM BACK. I thought that it would be uncomfortable because of the height difference, but it isn't. It isn't at all. I twist my arms around him and bury my head into his chest, his scent flooding my nostrils. It's fresh and clean; almost like some kind of a cologne. But then again, it's light and only noticeable if you're close enough; so it must be natural. Nothing like Axe; that stupid body spray that would be of better use in a garbage can. His scent is midway intoxicating and hard to forget.

     "What's going on Cohen?" Luke whispers, words muffled by my wild, curly blonde hair. His chin is resting on the top of my head and I can't remember the last time I have ever been so comfortable, felt so safe. For a second, I'm scared. It has only been four days since he first prompted me with the black mail. This is an arrangement, not a situation by choice. I know that, just like I know that it'll be over as soon as he gets an acceptance. I am scared because I feel so alone and everything is falling apart and I don't feel okay talking to Lucy anymore because I'm keeping too many secrets and she is focused on her life and I can't take her away from that. I am scared because I am in Luke's arms and he is showing compassion and care but I know that in the morning it will be gone. One second he is this gangly dork who makes me laugh and makes me feel okay but the next he is this narcissistic asshat who loves playing with my emotions, loves holding my writing hostage.

     I have to keep reminding myself that, otherwise I will get attached and I can't do that, I really can't. I suck in a sharp breath and untangle myself from him, slapping on a smile.

      "Nothing, I'm okay. Just problems with my mom," I start, wiping at my eyes with the back of my hand. This is the second time Luke has seen me cry, and I hate it. I had always kept my emotions in check but now, everything set me off and Luke was always around to see it. He was the only one around to see it, and I guess that was better than having a lot of people see me cry. Before, no one had ever witnessed my waterworks, but now I'd have to settle for one, since there was nothing I could do about it.

     "Problems you don't want to talk about because you think I don't give a shit? I do care, Cohen. You always say that I don't, but I do. If you want to talk about it, you can." He slurs minimally, staring at me intently to keep his focus through the haze of alcohol.

      "Honestly," I insist, even though I'm completely lying. "Everything is fine, just lost my head for a second." I pick my phone up from the ground and jam it into the back pocket of the jeans I currently adorned. My nails dig into the palm of my hand and I press, press, press, trying to distract myself. It didn't work. I don't even know if I want to respond to the messages, let alone how I would begin doing that. I am well aware of the stress and pressure my mother is going through; I understand it completely. But no matter how much pain someone is in, they should never take it out on someone else. Ever.

      "Don't bullshit me," He says quietly, setting both of his large hands on my shoulders. After a few seconds of staring at me, he starts talking again."Let's go, we're getting real food; none of that cafeteria crap. And then you're going to tell me what's going on whilst I sober up, and we'll get Lucy and drive home."

      "Lucy has plans, I think she's driving back in the morning." I respond, liking the idea of food but not so much the talking. 

     "Alright, just you and me then." A lazy smile spreads across his lips; eyes glossy from the alcohol. 

      Luke and I stumble blindly in the dimly lit hallway, climbing over unconscious bodies, discarded plastic cups, and a variety of other objects strewn across the floor. In minutes we are buckled into his car and we're listening to Good Charlotte as Luke relies on his phone to get him to the nearest diner. My phone keeps vibrating, but I'm scared to see who is responsible. I don't think I can take another spiteful message from my mother, so I simply turn Luke's radio up higher and ignore the buzzing against my skin.