Saiki K. Oneshots

Saiki x Harry Potter

Why do I write shit that no one asked for?

Because I get a high that's better than nicotine.

Saiki was likely known as a common muggle immigrant moving to England to start a career fresh, at a young age, so he could learn more, and have more success in the future. There was no problem with that, not at all, and no one would look at him oddly because of it, if you minus the fact that he's only seventeen years of age, and was only trying to one-up his elder brother, by threatening him.

Saiki soon became just as wealthy as his young adult brother by starting his own business, under the alias of Susuo Kaiki, no one would suspect a thing that his real name was Kusuo Saiki, it was a genius plan, thought out by the same teen who had the emotional capabilities of a hair tie(for anything other than a kid that is).

But this afternoon was a little different from the rest of the afternoons after Kusuo closed down his one of a kind: Saiki Sneezies, a joke, and icecreamery shop that he started right outside of the main street, (Completely fucking up his alias). he said goodbye to a man who came around quite often, as he (Kusuo) held onto Yuuta's hand who had just walked up to him, from the park that was across the street, (Saiki was taking care of Yuuta that summer, but feared that Yuuta would get bored, so he would send the kid off to the park, where he would enjoy himself for hours until lunch and then closing.)

"Good night Mr. Weasley," Saiki said as he locked up the shop, as the larger ginger male, with a bag full of treats for his kids, waved goodbye and a thank you to the young and hardworking (Even though it was out of spite) young man.

"How was your day?" Saiki had to ask, not really caring about Yuuta's day, it was just a good way to get the kid to run out of energy before going to sleep in his apartment that he had rented out for the year.

"Oh it was nice..." Yuuta trailed off, and Saiki looked at him with a quirk of the brow, Yuuta always said more and how his adventures were, but then the truth hit, and Yuuta began to tear up. "A big man broke my toy, and threw me to the ground." he sniffled and sobbed while wiping away his tears.

"And what did you do?" Saiki said and had stopped walking, usually when Yuuta got bullied it was by kids this age, though the way he depicted this bully made it seem he was Saiki's age or so, and other than worrying him slightly it made him angry.

Yuuta continued to walk, "Yeah, be broke by Cyborg Ciderman Verison One action figure, but he was speaking English, so I don't understand what he said." Yuuta complained, but was sad and began to cry that he would never get another Cyderman figurine again. Yuuta ended up pointing out who this boy was (as he was still at the park), and Saiki brought Yuuta home right away and put him to sleep quickly, considering it was eight at night and clearly bright outside.

When Yuuta went to sleep, Saiki went back to the park seconds later (Teleportation), to deal with the big kid.

And Saiki couldn't disagree, the kid was big, and likely a year younger than Saiki, making him absolutely disgusted.

"What a babbling little shit!" the big man said, talking smack about Yuuta, the five-year-old child.

"Hey Big-D, have you finished beating up little kids, I saw you take the toy away from a boy that didn't even speak English?" a boy on the swing set had asked, he was a four-eyes and had the sass of a high school girl with a sugar daddy.

Saiki walked slowly, towards them, like a snake stalking a pray. "This one deserved it..." the fat man said slowly, as Saiki stalked his way towards the boy, with a tight firey fist that would give this 'Big-D' boy a third-degree burn, but ended up choosing a stick, instead of something that would lead him to show his powers to six other members of the world. The peers of Big-D agreed cluelessly.

"Five against two, very mature of you..." The swing set boy said, noticing Saiki behind the group of boys, half-smiling at the karma this boy will receive.

"Two?" the big man repeated, "It was one little bug, unless..." be pressed on, "You count your boyfriend that you moan the name of every night... Cedric, was it?" he asked. Saiki paused for a split, he also heard Mr. Weasly think of a boy who had died named Cedric, and the four-eyes on the swing couldn't be the one to have seen his death... what was his name? Herold, Harrison? It didn't matter.

"No," it was a dry laugh erupting from the boy, "I think the 'little bug's' brother would like to have a word with you... or a stick, little Dudley," he said, giving up Saiki's spot with that sentence. The bully spun around, only to get knocked down with a stick to the face, and a loud splat to the ground, as blood came down from his nose.

It didn't take long for the rest of his gang to attack Saiki but was brought down to the ground one by one. "Stay away from him!" Saiki yelled with anger, as he paddled the main boy with the stick, even though the stick was long broken.

The four-eyes watched humorously, but quit laughing when the world became dark, soon running up to Saiki, and pulling him away from the group when ghost-like structures began to file out from the clouds, Saiki saw them as well, but the boy had to say, "Trust me!" and ran, Saiki was a quick runner but had nowhere to go, so he matched the pace of the boy's next to him.

Soon they slowed down into a tunnel of some sort, it wasn't nice, but the four-eyes needed to take a break, breathing heavily from the adrenaline, Saiki thought he and his anger was the cause of the sudden shift in the air, but soon found out otherwise, as the lights began to flicker and ice. Saiki knew he wasn't doing this.

But the boy began to gasp as the soul-less ghost creature with no brains appeared behind them, and raised him up to the air, attacking him and choking him, and warned Saiki to run, but he didn't, Saiki knew he couldn't just leave a kid to die. That would be unethical, and worse.

The media would be on him.

Saiki was swept off his feet, and the ghost floated in front of him breathing loudly but looked questioning at him like he was some sort of dog who didn't get the last treat of bacon.

The four-eyes then said something, and the ghost creature that attacked him went away, then soon the ghost above him disappeared too.

"Are you okay?" the boy panted and walked up to Saiki who laid on the ground, only to say.

"That was the weirdest thing I saw this year?" Saiki said, bored mostly, as he got up with the Helping Hand of the boy.

"This year?"

Are all Englishmen deaf?

"I saw a boar in the woods once," Saiki said stupidly, boars weren't native to Japan, at least he didn't think they were, he only saw one in his life-time outside the zoo before.

The boy stood there stunned, just as equally as he stood their stupid. What was he supposed to say, he wasn't even sure if the dementors took away his soul by the way he was speaking, or if he even saw them at all.

"Come on." Saiki said, "You're all wet, and it's raining." he said, "I can get you dried up in my shop."

~

*Bonus*

Saiki opened the door to his house the following morning, still questioning what the four-eyes did the day before (soon finding out his name was Harry), on the other side of the door was a weirdly dressed man that only said one word. "Obliviate." and pointed a stick to Saiki's head, right when the door opened.

( Rude )

A shot of light came at Saiki and racked through his head, searching for a memory, only to be forced out, no person no matter who they were, was going to take away Saiki's memory.

"I'm going to 'obliviate' you from this planet."

More and more people went out to take away Saiki's memory, but none came back.