Lonely in Berlin

Chapter 3: A bit of Christmas flirting

The conversation had flowed easily. We'd been talking for over an hour. We'd laughed, we'd flirted, and Jack kept looking at me like he wanted to devour me. Beneath his confident gaze, I was starting to feel all wriggly and horny. Every time he looked at me with his devilish smile and sparkling blue eyes, I felt my cock begin to engorge and push against the fabric that kept it neatly tucked between my legs. He even made a joking comment about spanking me when I made a cheeky remark. That made me go very, very red. Desire was rising inside me. The reservoir of excitement behind my mental dam was filling at a rapid rate, and I kept having to remind myself that I couldn't let it out.

As the pressure rose, I kept leaning forward, smoothing my skirt, tossing my hair, and tightly crossing and uncrossing my legs. But I had to keep my mental barriers up. I still hadn't mentioned anything about being trans. How could I know that his attitude wouldn't change the second I told him? How could I be sure he wouldn't get angry with me, or worse? How could I be sure he wouldn't accuse me of tricking him or making him feel like he was gay?

But... he was so disarming, and he really seemed to be into me, and I was getting tipsy. Every so often, I'd found myself forgetting that I wasn't going to allow myself to take this further. For a second or two, I'd lose my focus, and I'd accidentally release a little sluice gate in the dam that I'd been forcing shut. Thrilling little currents of water escaped past my barriers, and goosebumps rose on my skin. I kept finding myself looking at his lips. Then touching his arm. Then touching his leg... I could tell he liked that. But I was getting carried away. No, this couldn't happen...

"You look cold," said Jack, as my hand retreated sheepishly from his thigh.

"I am cold," I replied, and I was. My cold tolerance was high, but now I'd stopped walking around, I was getting chilly.

"Why don't you come and sit on my lap?" Jack said with a grin. "I can put my coat around both of us like a blanket."

I took a deep breath. That sounded good, but it was a step too far. I was being silly, and it was time for me to leave.

"Sorry, Jack," I said, "It's been really, really lovely talking to you, but I need to get home now."

Disappointment flashed across his face, but he hid it quickly.

"Ah, that's a shame," he said, "I was really enjoying talking to you. You don't have to sit on my lap if you don't want to."

"I do want to," I said, "but it's getting late. And I've only just met you. Maybe I could give you my number?"

"Yeah, I'd like that," he said.

I got to my feet. Maybe I could message him to say I was trans, and then I wouldn't need to be next to him as he rejected me. Or maybe I would never message him, that way I'd never have to face the rejection at all, I could just enjoy the fantasy of what might have been. God, I'd enjoy that fantasy... feeling his big hands all over me. I would probably masturbate myself into a coma over that one.

As Jack took out his phone to take my number, I saw a family walk by. It was the family from before: the young woman with the stroller, her husband, and the small boy. The boy was holding a wet-looking doll. The doll he had lost earlier.

"Hey, Gunter!" Jack called out.

The boy looked over and started waving at Jack. Then the parents started waving. I looked at Jack, who was smiling. I looked at the family, who were smiling too. I looked at the doll.

"Do you know them?" I asked.

"I ran into them earlier," he said, "remember, the kid had dropped his doll. I saw you were about to give it back to him, but your boss got in the way."