My Engineer - Main - FanFic

CooperPoy 01

My Engineer - Special 01 - Cooper x Poy - Journey of My Engineer - I Rather Be Sensationalized Than Immaterialized, So Think of Me, Love Me!

(June 2017)

Four years ago, before Poy left for UTCC, he made the biggest decision of his life and came out to his parents.

Initially, Poy had wanted to keep his head down and wait until he's older before telling his Ma and Pa but they endlessly asked if he had a girlfriend and even tried to arrange a marriage for him on multiple occasions...

He gandered that they suspected it hence why they were so persistent...

It became too suffocating...

He couldn't avoid discussing that topic with them any longer...

It took a toll on him to think his parents might hate him...

He couldn't lie to them or himself anymore...

He needed to let them know...

That was why he choose to tell them, he decided, honesty is the best policy...

There was yelling...

There was screaming...

There was crying...

His parents blamed themselves for not enrolling him in a normal school; heated arguments ensued, followed by a cold war.

They didn't speak to Poy until the eve before he had to leave for the dorms.

That evening, his Ma and Pa had a heart-to-heart with him. Mama Poy hugged him and said that as long as he is happy, she will accept him no matter what because he's her precious son. Papa Poy was reluctant but told him, he may not agree with his life choice but he will try his best to support him in any way that he can.

They eventually came to term and recognized that it isn't an option, it's not something one could...or should control.

Poy understood their initial unwillingness, when he first realized the male body excites him, he was also pretty startled.

Though to him, it clarified a lot of things, like the simple question of why he never developed any feelings for the opposite sex.

There wasn't a defining moment as to when Poy accepted the fact that he likes guys, it was likely around the time he entered St. Gabriel's, an all-boys Catholic school. It was the perfect brewing ground, there were so many around him, day, night, left, right, tall, short, he couldn't avoid confronting it even if he tried.

He had sought to make peace with it and told himself that it was okay to be different, but it wasn't as easy as one would surmise. He couldn't get it out of his head that his type was frowned upon, that to everyone else, he was considered sick, that he is a sinner.

His first crush, his best friend at the time, had jokingly asked but Poy never confirmed or denied it. He didn't have the courage to confess because he figured it would be fruitless. They graduated and went their separate ways.

At times he would still wonder, if he had told him the truth, would the ending have been different?

Maybe he would at least have someone to talk to?

He didn't know who to turn to throughout those few years, he remained silent, smiled through it all and studied like the well-behaved child that he was expected to be.

It was too empty...

Thankfully, in the long run, his Ma and Pa love him enough to not despise him but it wasn't like he could speak his mind to them. When he received their blessings he felt the weight of the world lifted from his shoulders, he was able to move on with his life, but something was missing...

The transition from high school to university, Poy lost contact with many friends, some went to different parts of the country, others went abroad, that was just how life worked.

When he settled in at UTCC, it wasn't any better, even though he was tall and cute with his dorky exterior and shy personality, he didn't make many friends.

It was incredibly lonely, on such a large campus, in this populous world, he was completely on his own...

Until he came along...

One day, during a school function, Poy stumbled upon a mini fan meet for a BL TV series in which a senior of his had acted in, one sentence from him changed his perspective of the world.

On stage, the handsome actor said, "Whether I like guys or girls, it doesn't define me, love defies all gender; there will always be people who judge me by my preference, but I don't have to measure myself by those standards."

He was awestruck!

He couldn't even tell his best friend...yet, this guy confidently announced it to the whole world that it didn't matter?!

It made him want to be more courageous.

It relieved some of his lonesomeness to know that there is at least one other person like him out there.

Poy couldn't get the elder boy out of his mind, once he returned to the dorms he immediately looked him up online, Cooper Patpasit Na Songkhla; he became Poy's first and only idol crush.

The search opened Poy up to a new world he never knew existed, TV series, movies, books, animations, he downloaded and binged all of them!

It made him feel that someone like him had a chance in this cruel world. Though, it also became somewhat of an obsession.

He often imagined being the main characters and as time went on, he fantasized about being those actors.

He wanted to be like them!

Confident!

Strong!

Daring!

To show everyone that being different is okay!

Liking someone of the same sex isn't something others should be able to judge!

He wanted to show the world!