Simple Words

The Secret

So this chapter was super interesting to write mainly because it's the lead up to a defining moment.

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It has been a few weeks since I started my job. I haven't talked to Mr. Ramirez much lately, most of the time he just hands me the list silently and heads back to his desk. I can't say I'm mad at it though, I mean even without talking there is a feeling of mutual understanding between us and I like that.

Somehow I have managed to convince my parents that I have found some friends and that I go spend time with them every day. For most girls that would be a pretty believable lie, however I have never clicked with another girl they are always too daft and useless. Since I didn't really have any friends it took a lot of convincing to make it believable.

"Okay, file 56; deal completed with legal contract." I mumbled to myself as I slid yet another contract and folder into its appropriate shelf. Today has been pretty easy work, just a lot of mind numbingly boring tasks, like filing a whole box of old contracts.

Pretty soon my day was over and I hurriedly gathered all of my stuff; my mother informed me that I would have to attend a big ball tonight, which I was undoubtedly "thrilled" to go to. I pulled my jacket on as I opened the door and was met with Mr. Ramirez leaving his office.

"Hello Mr. Ramirez, I am sorry I can't stay longer, but I am afraid I have a commitment to get too". I told him as I started walking down the hallway.

"Wait, I need to give you something". He half yelled down the hall, I turned and started making my way back to him. "You need your first paycheck." He said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a crisp check, my name scribbled on the first page.

I got a bit giddy but quickly went back to my neutral expression. "Thank you so much,I'm glad my work paid off" I gave him a small smile and I could swear there was confusion that crossed his eyes when I did.

I hurried out of the office and called a cabriolet. I smiled while staring at the check in my hands the entire way home. A 200$ check is huge, I knew this was a good job, but I didn't realize it was this good. Now I can move out and get a *tenement* sooner than planned.

I was daydreaming about what living alone and being free to be myself would be like when I pulled up at my house. I changed into the extra clothes I had in the forest and headed inside. Surprisingly my sister greeted me, "mother left you a dress for the ball on your bed" she said giving a slight nod before walking off.

I wonder if my sister will be sad when I leave, I know my brother won't. I knew people from school who had siblings and they always had this connection, even if they were mad at eachother you could always see that they would protect the other at all costs. I've never felt that my siblings and I have never really had a relationship, it was more of a tolerance to each other. I have always just felt disconnected from them, it's as if we were strangers in our own home which I guess is a sad reality. I have never really been close with someone, but I have always wanted to be.

I open the door to my bedroom and silently admire the dress on my bed. I generally don't give much thought or care into dresses as they are useless bundles of fabric. This one however was different; the skirt wasn't a big obnoxious one and it was in the colour violet which is a colour that makes everything better. It had a soft neckline with light purple lace making its way down the dress and the more one looks the more intricate it becomes.

I pulled up the dress and tied it myself, I decided against a corset as it is uncomfortable and painful. Even with my slight disdain for dresses I had to admit this one was quite nice. I spun a bit in the mirror, wanting to see the dress in motion. I dabbed on a bit of simple makeup before heading downstairs.

My mother came up to me as soon as I was in sight and started her neurotic adjustments to my hair and dress. I was thankful when the carriage came because I could have sworn one more "oh this could look better" as she adjusted yet another ruffle and I would have knocked her out with my shoe.

The carriage ride was silent but peaceful; silence was something that I have never minded, I always found it peaceful. It gave me more time to think about how I was going to avoid every man at the ball tonight.

The ball was packed full with wildly different men and women. I very quickly found my way to the food and took a comfortable seat next to all of the desserts this time.

I watched some of the people in the ball for a few moments since I liked to analyze people. I know that the woman talking to the colonel was actually married and came out here to have an affair. Just from his body language one of the nobles was just broken up with and so he came here, not to hook up but actually just need someone to talk

I glanced around as I looked for another interesting person. My eyes met someone's who were all too familiar. "Mr. Ramirez" I whisper, my breath hitches, what am I supposed to do. I slink back into the shadows, I was praying he didn't see me. At first I thought he didn't, then I step out from the shadows and immediately his eyes met mine. A look of confusion crossed his eyes as he started making his way over to me. Instead of doing anything remotely polite or Normal I half ran half walked as fast as I could outside and into some of the gardens.

I sat down on a rock, making sure to look around so I know if anyone was looking for me.

A voice I knew very well came out of the bushes.

"hello" Mr. Ramirez said with a clear look of confusion written in detail on his features.

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*Tenement - basically an 1800's version of an apartment"

I hope you enjoyed this chapter and as always feel free to send me any advice or ideas on the book.