Here in the In-Between

01 : Beginnings

Hi, I'm Harmony. It's currently Monday, May 25th at 3:19 in the morning. I'm watching 13 Reasons Why…

I guess that is what inspired me to write this.

I would love to say I'm a writer, but with my feelings I like to talk more. That's probably why I wish I had some cassette tapes. So many thoughts are running through my head right now, although when isn't there?

So now, here I am sitting on a makeshift bed at my sister-in-law's apartment with one too many thoughts, chapped lips, and awful acne.

Hi, I'm Harmony.

I'm not writing this for attention, I don't want or need attention. If you think that, then leave. I guess.

Actually, do whatever the hell you feel like. I can't stop you.

I'm writing this because Wattpad is my outlet. Wattpad has gotten me through bad memories and even worse thoughts. Wattpad has allowed my broke ass to read amazing stories, and not so amazing stories.

Although, what do I, a stupid teenager, know about amazing books? Or anything? I can't even explain my personality in those dumb "describe yourself" text boxes.

I know 11 things about myself, things I don't think I would ever doubt about myself.

1. I'm as stubborn as fuck
2. I'm a selfish person
3. I'm definitely wrong in the head, somewhere
4. I'm an animal person, in real life people can usually go fuck themselves
5. I'm dumb
6. I'm a people pleaser, I can't stand to be judged or have anything I create judged
7. I'm so insecure it hurts
8. My sleep schedule needs repair
9. I'm one depressed little girl
10. I am so paranoid it's surprising
11. I have many beliefs, but I do believe suicide is always an option

I know everyone is either going to freak out about the last one, or be so far down that they either agree or don't care. But it's true. Everything is an option. Some will lead to better results than others. Suicide to some people will seem like the only option, which it's not, but it's still an option.

So, those are my thoughts. That is what my brain is thinking of, right now. Now onto my physical appearance!

I'm a teenage girl, a paranoid teenage girl who doesn't want to put her age out. Anywhere. I have brown and blonde hair (mostly brown, just a few streaks of blonde) that goes to the middle of my back. Blueish-grey eyes, yes that is a thing. Very pale, white skin with yellow tones. Not to mention freckles and scars, everywhere. I love both.

Have I made you uncomfortable yet?

Good.

Hopefully that means you'll leave instead of getting traumatised by me.

Well, that last statement was made thinking you answered "Yes" or "Kind of" if you didn't then…

I repeat things that I believe to be important, in speech. If you could hear my voice right now, you would understand why I'm repeating this.

Hi, I'm Harmony.