WARNING: badly written but a rewrite is up on my page
REDAMANCY | Lorna and her friends are the demigods of the great prophecy. Together, they will sail to Rome, with a camp of demigods trying to kill them, to save a son of Hades, and follow the Mar...
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8. Hot Stuff
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Leo psyched himself up for an extreme makeover. He summoned some breath mints and a pair of welding goggles from his tool belt. The goggles weren't exactly sunglasses, but they'd have to do. He rolled up the sleeves of his shirt. He used some machine oil to grease back his hair. He stuck a wrench in his back pocket and Lorna drew a tattoo on his biceps with a marker: HOT STUFF, with a skull and crossbones.
"What in the world are you thinking?" Hazel said, sounding pretty flustered.
"Just concentrate on moving that Celestial bronze. Echo, you ready?" Lorna asked.
"Ready," she said.
"Leo?" Lorna asked.
Leo took a deep breath. He strutted back toward the pond, hoping he looked awesome and not like he had some sort of nervous affliction.
"Leo is the coolest!" he shouted.
"Leo is the coolest!" Echo shouted back.
"Yeah, baby, check me out!"
"Check me out!" Echo said.
"Make way for the king!"
"The king!"
"Narcissus is weak!"
"Weak!"
The crowd of nymphs scattered in surprise. Leo shooed them away as if they were bothering him. "No autographs, girls. I know you want some Leo time, but I'm way too cool. You better just hang around that ugly dweeb Narcissus. He's lame!"
"Lame!" Echo said with enthusiasm.
The nymphs muttered angrily. "What are you talking about?" one demanded.
"You're lame," said another.
Leo adjusted his goggles and smiled. He flexed his biceps, though he didn't have much to flex, and showed off his HOT STUFF tattoo. He had the nymphs' attention, if only because they were stunned; but Narcissus was still fixed on his own reflection.
"You know how ugly Narcissus is?" Leo asked the crowd. "He's so ugly, when he was born his mama thought he was a backward centaur—with a horse butt for a face."
Some of the nymphs gasped. Narcissus frowned, as though he was vaguely aware of a gnat buzzing around his head.
"You know why his bow has cobwebs?" Leo continued. "He uses it to hunt for dates, but he can't find one!"
One of the nymphs laughed. The others quickly elbowed her into silence. Narcissus turned and scowled at Leo. "Who are you?"
"I'm the Super-sized McShizzle, man!" Leo said. "I'm Leo Valdez, bad boy supreme. And the ladies love a bad boy."
