Someone You Loved

Prologue

"I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to save me
This all or nothing really got a way of driving me crazy"

Sa kabila ng hiyawang bumabalot sa buong stadium, ang bawat liriko ng kantang lumalabas sa bibig nito kasama ang napakasakit na emosyon ibinubuhos nya habang kumakanta ay doble o mas higit pa ang sakit na bumabalik at patuloy na dumudurog sa puso ko.

'Takot kang walang magliligtas sayo, pero lagi naman akong nandito. I am always at your side. Kahit nga may sarili akong problema at sakit ay dinadamayan parin kita. I became your crying shoulder. Isinasantabi ko lahat para lang hindi mo isiping nagiisa ka lang'.

'Kahit masakit sa aking naririto naman ako pero iba parin ang hinahanap mo.'

"I need somebody to heal
Somebody to know
Somebody to have
Somebody to hold
It's easy to say
But it's never the same
I guess I kinda liked the way you numbed all the pain"

Youre asking for somebody to know that you forget 'That I know'

Youre asking for somebody to have and to hold you na hindi mo napansing 'I am always here holding you. You have all of me'

And I guess, We are both numbed because of our emotion and feelings.

Bakit? Bakit sa kabila ng lahat sya pa rin? Bakit kailangan sya pa yung palagi mong hinahanap pero ako? Ako na laging nasa tabi mo ay hindi mo mapansin. Siguro, masokista nga ata talaga ako.

Gusto kong burahin ang mga sakit dyan sa mga mata mo. Pero wala, bulag ka sa pagmamahal para sa kanya na nakalimutan mong nandito lang ako.

"Now the day bleeds
Into nightfall
And you're not here
To get me through it all
I let my guard down
And then you pulled the rug
I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved"

Nagtitiis ako, kahit habang nakikita kitang nagmamahal ng iba isinasawalang bahala ko. Kasi pareho lang tayo. Alam ko ang nararamdaman mo kaya kahit ako nalang ang masaktan huwag ka lang.

Nagmahal ka ng isang taong may ibang mahal. Masakit? Malungkot? Nakakadurog?

Pareho tayo. Mahal kita kahit may mahal kang iba. Masakit. Malungkot. At higit sa lahat, nakakadurog.

"I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to turn to
This all or nothing way of loving got me sleeping without you
Now, I need somebody to know
Somebody to heal
Somebody to have
Just to know how it feels
It's easy to say but it's never the same
I guess I kinda liked the way you helped me escape"

Tears are dripping in his eyes. Hindi man kita ng ibang manunuod, pero ako? Kitang kita ko kung paano ito tumulo.

Kasabay ng pagtulo ng mga luha mo ay ang syang pagtulo rin ng sa akin.

"Now the day bleeds
Into nightfall
And you're not here
To get me through it all
I let my guard down
And then you pulled the rug
I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved"

This day will be last that I will cry. Durog na durog at manhid na manhid na ako. You can no longer save me from pain that you caused unintentionally.

Nasanay kang lagi syang naririyan nagmamahal sayo, pero kahit minsan hindi ka nasanay sa araw araw kong pagmamahal, pagtulong, at hindi pagbitiw sayo kahit binitiwan ka na rin nya.

"And I tend to close my eyes when it hurts sometimes
I fall into your arms
I'll be safe in your sound 'til I come back around"

I wipe my tears. Sa kabila ng sisikan ng lahat ng tao, pinilit kong umalis.

Tulad ng pag alis ko ngayon at pagiwan ko sayo. Mahirap, masakit at patuloy na madudurog ang puso ko sa desisyong ito.

"For now the day bleeds
Into nightfall
And you're not here
To get me through it all
I let my guard down
And then you pulled the rug
I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved"

It hurt to see you loving someone that you forget about me.
I will leave for now because the pain will never subside if I continue being with you.

"But now the day bleeds
Into nightfall
And you're not here
To get me through it all
I let my guard down
And then you pulled the rug
I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved"

Pagod na rin ako. Nasanay na rin sayo. All my defense and support ay ibinigay ko sayo na nakalimutan kong kailangan ko rin pala non. Na kailangan ko rin pala yung depensa at suporta.

I need someone to protect and support me. Someone who is always there when I am in pain or when I am in danger. Someone who is willing to fight for me.

Pagod na ako sa 'Pagpapangap na okey ako'. Sa 'Pagpapangap na malakas ako'

Pahina na ng pahina ang naririnig ko dahil palayo na rin ng palayo ang tinatahak ko.

"I let my guard down
And then you pulled the rug
I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved"

Pagod na akong palaging makihati sa pagibig.

You are sad and in pain because of that Someone You Loved na nasanay ka na sa sakit.

Subalit, hindi ko kaya. Kasi pareho lang tayo. Nakikihati rin ako sa Pagibig na iniaalay mo sa iba.

Umaasa na lang palagi na sana mapansin mo rin ako. Na hindi nalang pagiging dakilang sandalan mo ako.

But, I know, na kahit kailan ay hindi mangyayari dahil hanggang panaginip nalang.

I will leave for now.

Ititigil ko munang makihati at hihintayin kong ako na ang that "Someone You Loved" na tinutukoy mo.

Pero kung darating man ang oras at panahong iyon, hindi kita iiwan at bibitawan dahil hindi ko kakayanin ang sakit na nararamdaman mo tulad ng pait na nararamdaman ko sa bawat bigkas mo ng kanta ng dahil sa kanya.

I will leave for now, for I need to build my self again. I am broken inside and out. Like I always fear, the love that I have for you is consuming me that I forgot to Love my own self.

Until we meet again, Kaizer.

FLINNYX

The story comes from the song entitled:
Someone You Loved by Lewis Capaldi.

The Lyrique Series by Flinnyx