To Protect (TFP Ratchet x Gender Neutral Reader)

Chapter 4 - First strand of hope

a/n I'm back and I'm gone :)

btw did not reread this so there's probably quite a few mistakes, you have been warned. 

Your optics shot open as they gave off a dim (e/c) light, your breath heaved as your system turned and toiled. You could still feel his warmth on your, his strong embrace the gentle touches of his kisses, that tender glow of their optics, the low rumble of their voice. Everything felt so real, too real, maybe because it was real.

You could feel your spark tug towards him when he smiled, the warm sensation that spreads from your spark out towards your limbs, the way your system spins just that little bit faster when he holds you that little bit tighter.

Yet, with every second that passes you can feel their presence fading, the sound of their voice, the look in their eyes. You knew they're important, you don't want to lose them, not again, not ever again. But who are they? Who are they to you? Who did you just see? What was that dream? Everything was gone in an instant like a ticking bomb.

Your spark drops as dread settled in its new home. Closing your optics, you murmured under your breath, praying to remember something, anything that can tell you who they are and why they matter so much to the point your spark aches for them.

Shooting up from your berth, without a word you darted out of the room, (e/c) optics bright like the stars, you must tell him. "Ratchet!" you shrieked, excitement in your voice as you held onto your first strand of hope.

You watched as the medic jumped in alert from his rest before relaxing upon seeing your form by his doorway, "(y/n) it's the middle of the night, even I need to recharge sometimes," he grumbled but was silenced at your next set of words, his optics widened.

"I remembered something!" You couldn't stop yourself from grinning cheek to cheek at your first recovery for the first time ever since you met the team. Ever since your talk with the medic you've gotten close, he seemed to understand what you're going through, after all, he listens to every word you say, he's been there for you. You didn't expect any less from the chief medical officer, even when that title was abandoned long ago. You just had to tell him the first time before it slips away from you again. Stepping in, the door slid shut behind you as you sat down at the chair beside his desk. "I remembered someone, I don't... really know who yet. But they were important to me somehow...it's like if I find them, I'll know who I am. I'll be whole again," you said, looking down at your hands that have once caressed them. Your optics shut as to remanence that moment, trying to remember the scene more clearly, "I remember they loved to looking over Iacon, watching as the stars twinkled, the lights flash, and Cybertronians passing by just like-"

"He was in love with Cybertron."

You opened your optics, looking towards the medic who was sitting on the edge of his berth now. "he was in love with Cybertron, yes... how did you know?" you asked blankly, he couldn't have known the bot could he?

"Just a lucky guess," Ratchet just gave a small shrug as his gaze was locked on the metallic ground when his voice rumbled through the still air. "It's good you remembered something, that means it's slowly coming back to you," he said, his gaze finally meeting yours with an unreadable look behind his azure optics. "In the meantime, go back and recharge. You got your first mission with the team tomorrow; you're going to need it. I need it," as if to prove a point the medic lets out a yawn before ushering you out of his quarters. Just as he was about to shut the door after shoving you out, you spoke.

"Hey, Ratchet."

"What?"

"Thank you."

He lets out a noise similar to "Beh" before the door slid shut.

Ratchet slid down the door with his back pressed against it, hearing your gentle footsteps fade into the distance. His knees brought up to his chest as his head pressed between it. You remembered something, you remembered him, but you didn't recognize him...

He still remembers those times he would gaze out towards Iacon after a long day of work. He remanence those days, when home still existed, when you were still in his life.

His gaze flickered across the busy streets of Cybertronians big and small maneuvering their way through the familiar streets. A gentle smile faded onto his face at the thought of his planet, his friends, and the love of his life that he had never expected to encounter.

"You almost look like you're in loved with the city, or perhaps Cybertron itself." Came a familiar teasing voice as the medic rolled his eyes at the (f/c) Cybertronian that had snuck up beside him. "I'll get jealous, but I guess I can't compete with a whole planet that's providing everyone with their needs."

Ratchet grunted with a defeated look, "You should get that brain module of yours checked," he said, giving the other bot's head a gentle knock while they just let out a hearty laugh that deep down melts his spark every time it's within earshot. "I love the city, but I love you too," he spoke in a barely audible voice, his gaze locked back onto the animated city but from the corner of his optics, he could see an even wider grin on the (f/c) bot's face.

He just hoped he could see that grin again, hear the same heart-warming laugh. Sure, he loved the city, but he knew all along, he had always loved (y/n) more, more than he could ever describe. He had lost both, but now you were back in his life it's more than he could ever ask for, even if he only lives in the back of your mind, you will forever live in his heart. He m