Married to the Heartless Billionaire

44: Life Without You

Days passed, people passed by and the burning feeling of grief lit inside of me. People from all over the world came by bringing flowers and blessings. He had impacted so many lives, people I hadn't known about. Organizations dropped by thanking him for all the work he did and hoped for a speedy recovery. All these people prayed and prayed, but every day I woke up waiting to see his daring eyes, I began to lose faith. I got out of my broken in cot and leaned against his hospital bed.

I grabbed my flip phone, he had wanted me to have and I clicked my second to last voicemail, listening to it till I felt sleepy, but today I didn't feel sleepy, but I felt guilty. Listening to him saying sorry, when it really should've been me saying it not him.

"I'm sorry", I told him as I placed my head in his chest. I was sorry for never being honest, about where I was from to who I am.

"I'm sorry I wasn't honest", I kissed his cold hand, the hand that had soothed me so many times, yet it seemed so lifeless in this heartbreaking moment.

"I have a sister, she'll be 12 this year, I've never met her, but I love her. I want to meet her, but I can't find her", I whispered to him letting go of my fears of letting someone in. The fear of losing him struck me the hardest, especially in this lonely hospital bed.

"12 years will mark my mother's death and the worst day of my life, and this is my second because you are not going to do die, your strong so please hold-hold on", I cried to him. I put my hand on his chest, this heart I had taken for granted more than once. I pushed, shook him away but I needed him. I listened to his steady heartbeat, over, again, and again, it soothes me to know his heart still fought.

"Please wake up", I begged him. I begged him every day before I went to bed, please wake up.

"I didn't tell you I loved you enough, because I love you with all my heart", my voice broke as tears spilled down my cheek.

"So please stay, fight like hell to stay because I love you and I want time, I want time for us to fall in love with each other, I want time for us to make little minions and love them like no tomorrow, I want time for us to grow old and die in each other's arms, not like this Nolan", I whaled to him. He needed to stay because I didn't know what I would do without him.

"Please wake up, because I can't imagine my life without you. I've been alone all my life, until you. I don't want to live without you, I don't, so please wake up", I begged him mercilessly. I needed him to be okay, I needed him in my life every day because he made it better.

I was surrounded by sunflowers cradled near me as if they all gave me a hug. I stood up as the sunflowers swayed following the wind. I patted down the sundress that flowed at my sides, the sky shined bright as I felt the hot sun hit my skin.

I looked around, until I landed my glance  to the sparkling eyes, comfort, safely, love was all I saw as I ran to his arms. He opened them widely for me.

"I missed you", I hugged him tightly as I inhaled his scent, longing to hear his everlasting voice. He stared into my eyes as he tucked wisps of hair behind my ear and kissed my forehead.

"I missed you, too", He kissed my nose, as I held onto his voice like a prized possession I had just found. He picked me up and twirled me around as the flowers flowed to the wind.

"You're so beautiful", He told me as he pecked my lips and I wish I could've stayed in that moment forever, lost in his touch.

"I love you", I told him as I hugged him, never wanting to let him go.

"I love you, too.", he told me as his hair moved with the wind. His smile made mine brighter as I stared into his dreamy eyes.

"So when are we going to have those little minions?", he asked as he put his hand around my shoulder and hugged me close as he towered over me.