Thank you - Drarry

Chapter 7

TW: Mention of suicide

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Harry froze. Unsure of what to do and how to act. The blond boy hadn't noticed him yet. He was sitting curled up on the windowsill, a letter held tightly in his hands, his eyes fixated on the words written in dark ink and he had silent tears finding their way down his face. For a few seconds Harry just watched him. Since the age of eleven, when they had both started going to Hogwarts, Harry had never seen the other boy like this. Sure, in year six when he had followed him to the boy's bathroom to confront him about Katie Bell, Draco had been crying. But then he had been crying out of stress and fear. This time the tears that fell were out of pure heartbreak. They were uncontrollable, raw and they reminded Harry of those of a scared young child.

Suddenly, the boy on the windowsill noticed someone looking and quickly turned to see who it was. As his eyes meet Harrys, embarrassment flashed through them before he turned away, hiding his face. Harry wondered if he should just turn around and walk away. The other boy was obviously vulnerable right now and Harry didn't want to impose. He also wasn't sure of how Draco felt about him at the moment. They had not spoken since that day by the tree and Draco had been clear that he wasn't interested in changing that. At the same time, he knew that he couldn't just leave him alone. Not after Draco had already spotted him.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Harry walked over and sat down on the windowsill, so close their bodies were almost touching.

"You don't have to if you don't want to" he quickly added as the blond boy started wiping his tears away. For a few seconds they sat in silence, just looking out towards the frozen lake. Two younger Ravenclaws had brought their muggle ice-skates and were skating in circles over the ice.

"My dad's dead" Draco said suddenly. His eyes refusing to meet Harry's who quickly stopped watching the dance on the lake and were now focusing on the boy next to him.

Harry felt shocked. And then he felt unsure of what to do next. Lucius Malfoy had never been one of Harrys favorite people, this was no secret. The man had been one of Voldemort's most loyal servants since even before he had come back in Harry's fourth year. But despite all of that he was still Draco's dad, and Harry couldn't even begin to imagine what it must feel like for him to lose his father. Yes, Harry had lost both his parents, but he had been too young to understand it. He might have been able to compare it to losing Sirius, but even there, his godfather had only been in his life for two years when he lost him, not eighteen.

During the short seconds where Harry tried to figure out what to say, the other boy had collected himself enough to continue.

Draco explained how his father had been found guilty of supporting Voldemort and he had been sent back to Azkaban at the beginning of summer. "Which I'm sure you already knew" he added quietly. After coming back from Azkaban, the first time, he had been a changed man Draco explained. Everyone had seen that he had been weeks away from breaking. So, this time, neither Draco nor his mother had expected him to last long. In his hands, Draco had a letter from his mother telling him that his father had hung himself in his cell, using an old blanket as a rope. The places where Narcissa Malfoys' tears had smudged the ink laid next to where her sons own tears now fell.

The words "I'm sorry" escaped Harrys lips as Draco finished his story. They sounded stupid even in Harrys ears. They just sounded too simple. They were too cliché. Not enough for what he really wanted to say. But as he looked up at Draco and their eyes met, he saw that somehow, they had been enough for Draco. Draco's eyes drifted out the window, falling on the girls on the lake. Harry's gaze followed and for a few minutes they just sat together, in silence, watching the grounds. The silence felt comfortable. Harry felt comfortable sitting there with Draco in a way he didn't think he would feel again. Not after everything that had happened after Halloween. As they sat, Harry grew more and more aware of the body next to his. He could feel the warmth of Draco's body as they sat on the cold windowsill. His hand, still holding the letter laid on his thigh mere inches from Harry's own hand. For a moment he wanted to take it. Hold it, just to show that he was there. To show that he was there for him, how crazy that might be after all they'd been thorough.

"I never told him that I loved him"

Draco's voice pulled Harry back to reality. A few seconds went by as his brain tried to catch up on what the other boy had said. Draco's eyes hadn't left the ice-skating Ravenclaws. A silent tear rolled down his cheek and Harry had to restrain himself from reaching up and stroking it away.

"I was too angry at him. I hated him and everything that he had done... everything that he had made me do. So, before they sent him to Azkaban, when me and mom had our chance to say goodbye to him, I couldn't say it." More tears found their way down his face as he continued, his eyes never leaving the lake.

"I should have told him!" Draco's voice cracked as he uttered those last few words, regret filling his voice. Harry could no longer hold himself back as he slowly lifted his hand towards Draco's face and gently wiped some of the tears away. Harry felt the Slytherin freeze under his touch, his eyes finally leaving the grounds and slowly moving to find Harrys. For a few seconds he seemed to be searching for something in Harrys eyes. What he was searching for Harry didn't know, but whatever it was, Draco seemed happy with what he found because he soon relaxed against Harrys touch. He wiped away the last few tears before dropping has hand from Draco's now slightly red cheek. And as soon as he did, he missed the feeling of Draco's skin against his own.

"Do you want to be alone?" Harry asked softly. He had never meant to impose to begin with and figured that the blond boy might want to be on his own for a while.

Draco hesitated for a few seconds before shaking his head slowly. His eyes fixated on his shoes; a faint blush visible on his cheeks.

If Harry was surprised with the answer, he didn't show it. All he said was a simple ok, before grabbing a random book from a nearby bookshelf, making himself comfortable in the corner of the windowsill and starting to read. Draco smiled softly at him before fishing out his own book from his bag on the floor and positioning himself in the opposite corner of the windowsill. For hours they sat like that. Reading, occasionally stealing glances of the other when they thought the other boy wasn't looking, and simply enjoying each other's company.