Good Little Guy (A Gumshall Fanfic)

A Rift Through Space

Gumball's POV

I sat there in front of my computer screen, traumatized and unsure of what to do, my eyes still wide with shock and my mouth still gaping open.

"Marshall hates me?" I thought, upset at the news, "Did I do something wrong?" My subconsciousness rolled its eyes at me as it seemed to laugh, "No Bubba, you did absolutely nothing wrong except for turning his fears against him and outing him even further."

I bit my lips still confused as I tried to decipher his words, "But now it's starting to feel like hate". Starting to feel like hate? Shouldn't he have started to hate me all those years back then on that rainy night? It just didn't make sense at all. The tip of my tongue tasted something metallic as a trail of blood rolled down from where my teeth had punctured my lips.

Reaching for a tissue and stopping midway, my eyes bulged in sudden disbelief and understanding.

"I loved you Bubba".

"No, it can't be," I muttered slowly, "No, no, no, no!"

The world seemed to spin around me as the truth started to sink in. "Marshall can't love me. He must have been talking about something else. That's right, he must have been talking about brotherly love, or love as friends. He can't mean love love!"

Marshall had told me that he was gay before. Heck, he had told me a lot of things about him that I would have not expected out of that grinning vampire. But I would have never guessed that he loved me. I thought that we would be best friends forever, not friends with benefits. He promised me...

My breathing started becoming uneven as I thought about all the things that could go wrong.

"He can't love me," I repeated again, as if that would shape it into reality, "He would be hurt by me if he did. Hurt and broken beyond repair. Better of being heartbroken."

Another realization seemed to dawn on me as I said the word again in my mind. The look on his face while he confessed was pure heartbreak. He loved me, that means that he doesn't love me anymore. I let out a sigh of relief that ended shortly. If he's heartbroken by my lack of affection, then that means he can easily fall in love with me again if I show him affection.

My heart ached as I thought about what I had to do. I gritted my teeth painfully and sadly as I said, "And if that's the case, then I won't let him love me. It's for the best."

"I'm a barbaric, lifeless piece of gum that will hurt anyone that loves me," I said, my voice rising slowly, "I'm selfish, insensitive, spiteful, and arrogant."

"All of those reasons are why he can't love me. But most importantly because," I hesitated, wondering if I really meant it, "Because I'm not gay anymore."

***

The constant beeping of the machine that had once been so hopeful has now become annoying as I sat there waiting for something else to happen.

I looked at the window to be met with a clear blue sky dotted with white fluffy clouds, tempting me to enjoy the day out in the Sun. Fionna had called me yesterday night to tell me that they were going to have their trip to a valley today because the weather looked nice, and from what I can see, she couldn't have picked a better day indeed. The light spring breeze gently ruffled my hair as I threw the machine a dirty look.

"No Bubba, you can't be jealous," I scolded myself, "It's for the best, remember?" But how could I not be jealous when they were probably having a perfect day and here I am stuck in front of this stupid machine.

I sighed, I had moved it to the highest tower in the hopes that its location was the issue blocking the reception. I was so close, but so far away at the same time. "All these weeks of anticipation for nothing," I thought miserably, "I guess it's another failed project."