Road Trip with Vampires: one star, would not recommend.

Skeletons in the closet, rifles in the attic

She must have fallen asleep while trying to knit. When she woke up, it was already morning. The house was still silent, apart from the tick-ticking of the clock.

Ilya was gone, along with his nest of blankets. Tethis decided to go make a cup of tea, until she remembered why the house was so empty.

Why weren't they back yet?

A click made her turn around. Ilya was there, cradling a long, black stick and talking to himself.

'And you think you got all our gunpowder...haven't seen dear ol' harmless Ilya's bedside table, eh?'

He laughed and lifted the stick to his shoulder, stopping abruptly when he saw Tethis.

'Oh. Pack your stuff, we're going.'

'The where and why, please.'

Ilya strapped the stick across his back. 'They haven't returned. It means they've employed Household Rule Number Three.'

'Isn't that the one where you're forbidden from bringing up algebra in any circumstance?'

'No, that's Rule Number Five. Number Three is "When faced with a mess needing clean-up, make a bigger mess to cancel out the first one." It always involves a last-minute departure from home. Ah, well, let's go hunting for fugitives.'

Tethis eyed the stick on his back, but decided to ask later. 'Do you have a water bottle or something? If this goes inland, I'm probably not going to live.' Not that she was going to live anyway, but it could buy her some time. Besides, she really wanted to scream at the three of them for being stupid.

They left, Ilya hurriedly tossing a floor-length veil over himself before exiting the door. Turning back to look at the crevice in the stone, he sighed. 'Hello, homelessness, my old friend,' he said, rolling up the welcome mat at the entrance. His gaze settled on Tethis, still standing on the stairs. 'Well?'

'I don't want to get electrocuted,' she said. Ilya clicked his tongue. 'You really believed what Konstantin told you? Esther can't even tase a baby with her spells. You'll be safe.'

Cautiously, Tethis took a step forward. She didn't get electrocuted. Still, she wasn't going to take any chances. Carefully measuring her steps, she ran up the steps and launched herself through the doorway, crashing into a rock under Ilya's amused gaze. 

'Take my advice, dearie. I've seen shit.'

Peeling herself from the rock, she unscrewed the top of her water bottle and plunged a finger into it, feeling a pleasant chill spread through her as it healed her.

Ilya was already walking. 'Follow me. Well, obviously. There's no one else to follow.'

He started climbing the rock face, raising Tethis's suspicions that he might actually be part mountain goat. But if he was climbing, and there was no one else around...

She looked at the ocean, contemplating it.

But if she escaped now, there was Poseidon to deal with. And how could she find Nix and scream at her without an experienced tracker?

She followed Ilya up the cliff face, trying her best to trace his steps.

Really, Number Three sounded like a household rule only enacted when big screw-ups happened. What did they do? Were any humans involved?

She hoped not. The next thing she needed was for another coven to start hunting them.

Realizing the absurdity of the situation, she held back a chuckle.

Oh, the stories these vampires would tell their companions one day. If they weren't arrested by then.

Perhaps that was why they had let down their guards. Well, Tethis was more than happy to cooperate with them. They had been quite nice.