I Know What You're Afraid Of

Chapter 14

   Marianne would be lying if she said she didn't see it coming. Miles was calm for too long, he had to break at some point. She understood though. It was a lot to handle, even she couldn't keep it together, though, she wished he'd let her help him. It was no secret Miles was cryptic and closed off. Marianne understood that better than anyone. She was trying to get better at trusting people. It was the hardest thing she'd ever done. Over the past couple of days, she had learned to accept the fact that Miles was aggressive by nature and didn't like to talk about himself. She decided she wouldn't push it, and just let him open up on his own terms. It was better for the both of them.

  
   Breakfast and lunch were awkward. No one spoke about Miles' near death the night before. No one spoke at all. They just sat in silence, mumbling a quick 'thank you' to Ricky before they got up and left. Marianne and Sydney talked while they cleaned up the dishes; Marianne washed while Sydney dried. "That was pretty terrifying." Sydney sighed. Marianne nodded, keeping her eyes on the sink full of water. "You looked really scared. Practically shaking." She continued. "You seem to care about him. A lot." I guess I do, Syd. Marianne didn't feel like getting into it. She couldn't talk about how she was feeling because she didn't know what she would even say. "Do you like him?" Marianne stopped scrubbing the plate and whipped her head around to look at Sydney, eyes wide. "You don't have to answer – No!"

 
"No, I don't like him. I don't even know him." Marianne said. "Wouldn't you be scared? I was watching him die!" Marianne found herself panicking. Sydney raised her hands in surrender. Marianne's thoughts were at war in her head. You don't know him; therefore, you don't like him. I mean, he could be a murderer for all you know. He already acts like he's hiding something. Maybe it's his secret profession. He could be part of a gang or the mafia. You don't know. While the other half picked out the positive. Don't be stupid. He's probably fine. Maybe. If he wanted to kill you, he would have done it already. What about last night. He almost died and you helped him. If anything, he should be thanking you.

  
   Sydney gave her a knowing look. "How did you sleep?" She said, a playful smirk strapped to her face. "Actually, where did you sleep would be the more appropriate question to ask?" When Marianne only bowed her head, Sydney laughed. "Don't worry, I won't tell. I get it. He almost died. I understand that you wanted to look out for him." Her voice was assuring. Marianne knew she could trust Sydney.

  "He asked me to stay.... actually." Marianne sighed. Sydney raised her brows. "Well, kind of. His eyes were closed, so he was probably sleeping. Or maybe that stuff made him loopy and he was out of it when he asked." she rambled. "Look, Syd. It's not a big deal, and to answer your question, I didn't sleep. I couldn't. Not after what happened." She lied. That was one thing Marianne admired about herself; she was a good liar. She didn't lie a lot, but when she did it was for a good reason. Most of the time. "I'm going to go try and make friends with Gina. Do you want to come?"

   
   Sydney shook her head. "No thanks. She seems like a tough crowd. You go ahead though."

   
   Marianne laughed and shook her head. "That's understandable. Wish me luck." She made her way up the old wooden steps. She rounded the corner and walked down the hall towards Gina's room. As much as she'd like to get on Gina's good side, she cursed herself for making it happen so soon. She just wanted that conversation to be over. It's not that she didn't trust Sydney, Marianne didn't rust herself. What I do like him? How would I handle that information? Would I be able to face him again, or look at him the same? Would I even look at him differently? How do I look at him now? All these questions plagued her mind, making her dizzy.

  
   Gina's door was cracked open a few inches. Marianne knocked on the door. She couldn't see Gina from where she was standing, but she could see a bottle on the dresser. Curious, she opened the door wider and walked in. Making sure Gina was not there, she walked closer to the dresser to get a better look. The bottle was clear, and it didn't have a label on it. Inside were clear pellets, identical to the one she found in her water, but a little bigger, having not dissolved at all. Marianne picked up the botte and spotted a skull engraved in the plastic cap. I wanted to be her friend. Marianne felt nauseous. She remembered seeing her walk out of the kitchen with something rattling around in her hand and how guilty she looked when she passed her. Marianne tucked the bottle into the pocket of her hoodie and ran to her room.

  
   She began to dig through the small pile of clothes on the floor until she found the pants, she wore the night before. Marianne dug through the pockets and grabbed the small pellet. She silently praised herself for figuring it out. Soon her mind started to race as she tried to think of a reason why Gina would want her dead. Marianne tried to be as nice as possible to her since she got here. Gina only ever glared at her and argued with her. It would explain why she was so angry last night. She was mad that it didn't work the way she had planned. Why she planned it was a mystery.

  
   Marianne bolted out of her room. She had to tell someone, and who better, than her fellow victim. She knocked frantically on Miles' door. He opened it and looked her over, confused. "What's your problem?" Marianne sighed and pushed past him, sitting down at the bay window. She pulled the bottle out of her pocket and lifted it out toward him. "Okay? Am I supposed to know what that is?"

  
   Marianne rolled her eyes. "This," She hissed. "is what almost killed you last night." She watched him closely for his reaction. His lips parted and his face paled (if that was possible) as he stared at her. "And guess where I found it." she challenged, waving the bottle around dramatically. She didn't wait for an answer. "I found it in Gina's room."

  
   Miles moved to sit next to her, tucking one leg under the other so he could angle himself more towards her. "So," he began, "it wasn't you." He said it more to himself than to her.

  
   Her eyes still widened in disgust and disbelief. "Why the hell would it be me?!" She yelled. "Might I remind you that I was the victim before you came along and drank from my glass. Who does that?!" She yelled in a whisper, not wanting anyone – specifically Gina – to hear.

  "I just wanted to mess with you. Are you saying you wish it were you?" He argued.

   "No, but it's better me than you!"

   "Why?" He shot back without missing a beat.

  
   Her mouth hung open, but no words came out. She didn't mean to say it, but she meant it. "I don't know. Just forget it, it's not important." She mumbled without looking at him.

Would I be able to look at him the same? How do I see him now?

  "Okay, so, how did you know what it looked like?" Miles asked.

  "I found one in my water after you left." She paused to take it out of her pocket. She reached out her hand for him to take it, which he did. "This one is smaller because it was partially dissolved when I found it."

   
   Miles held it in his hand like it was a grenade, seconds away from exploding. "Why would Gina want you dead?"

   "I have no clue.... but I am going to find out."