I Know What You're Afraid Of

Chapter 20

   Dying wasn't anything like I had expected it to be. There were no angels to guide you. No staircase to heaven. No light at the end of the tunnel. No sound. Nothing but darkness. Maybe I wasn't quite there yet. Maybe it was a sign that I shouldn't go. Not yet. Not like this. I wouldn't go. I willed myself to stay, no matter what. This wasn't over yet. They needed me, so I will stay for them... for him.

   The darkness began to fade into light. Then, a ringing. Then..., Marianne sat up gasping for air. I was back. Brad rolled her over sideways to help her cough all the water up. As she sat up, she was engulfed in a giant hug from Sydney.

   "Oh, thank Frick," She sighed. "I thought you were gone forever."

   Marianne wrapped her arms tightly around Sydney. "I'm not done here." She looked over Sydney's shoulder at Miles who stood a few feet away. She swore she could see tears in his eyes as he stared at her in awe. She shot him a small smile, which he returned to the best of his ability. When Sydney let go, she stood up and gave her a hand. Marianne could feel the weight of her body as she stood. Her legs buckled underneath her, feeling heavier than ever. Almost out of reflex, her hand shot out toward Miles who seemed to have the same idea when he grabbed her arm, hoisting her back up. She gave him a nod of appreciation and stabled herself. Hesitantly, he let go, keeping his hands out in front of him in case she fell.

   Ricky wrapped her in a comforting hug. In her opinion, he gave great hugs. She could tell he was just a giant teddy bear. Even through his smile. "Where'd you go? Was it scary?" He whispered.

   Marianne had no idea what to say. He was afraid of dying - who wouldn't be? But she couldn't tell him in all honesty how it felt. She was starting to forget already. So, she just squeezed him tighter and whispered back, "No. No, it wasn't so bad. I can't really remember." She felt him nod once, before pulling away.

   "Congratulations! You have successfully passed level 3.

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   They had all gone to their rooms after what happened. Marianne had thanked Brad for saving her, though he didn't really care. She had also tried her best to avoid Gina. She even locked her door, scared Gina would try to kill her in her sleep. It's not like she could just leave. Where would she go? She sat in the middle of her bed with all the lights on. In the back of her mind, she played the conversation with Miles on repeat. She heard his voice in her head, He'll hurt you, Mary. What had she done? He wants me to tell you. Why? He was talking to someone. Was it his sister? The night of the fire, it had to be. The doll from his backpack, maybe it's her. If what he said was true, if she was really a ghost... he could communicate with her.

   This was all so crazy. He was crazy for thinking she would believe it. She was crazy for believing it. But there was still a chance that it was real and he was telling the truth. The way he talked about it... it broke him, she saw it, heard it in his voice. If the story wasn't real, the pain certainly was.

   The somewhat soft pounding on the door startled her. She didn't want to open it for fear it was Gina, or some other weird creature thing. That is, until she heard a voice. "Mary, it's Miles. Can I come in?" She was relieved it wasn't who she thought, but she wasn't sure if she should let him in. He wasn't exactly comforting, which was what she needed then. But he was one of the only people she was willing to talk to, and the only one that came to see her. So, she got up and unlocked the door, opening it slightly, then backing up to let him in.

   The second the path was clear, he practically ran in, shutting the door softly behind him. Marianne didn't know how to take his stare. It was similar to the look he gave her in her nightmare, but his eyes were a little brighter. They were shining, though, she soon realized it was the tears. He walked closer to her, and she almost backed away, but he stopped abruptly. She furrowed her brows, confused. Then, he grabbed her shoulders. She was ready for him to shove her, like he did in the nightmare. However, he did the opposite. He pulled her into him, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and resting his chin on top of her head. She slowly returned the hug, wrapping her arms around his torso and resting her head on his chest.

   The sound of his heart beating distracted her. She was beginning to think he didn't have one. But this was proof that he did. "I'm glad you're okay," He whispered. "You scared me." He let out a dry chuckle, trying to cover up the sound of worry in his voice.

   Marianne smirked against his sweater. "Now you know how I felt," She mumbled. "Consider it my revenge." She heard him laugh under his breath. "You know, you give pretty great hugs."

   Miles pulled back, just enough to look down at her. "I don't usually do hugs, so, feel special."

   "I'm honoured," She joked. Releasing the hug, she backed up to sit on her bed. She patted the space next to her and he sat down.

   They sat in awkward silence for a few seconds. "I think Flora would really like you." He said suddenly. He continued to stare at the door in front of him.

   This was her chance to ask him the questions that had been plaguing her mind. "Flora..." she began. "Is that who you were talking to? Before the fire?"

   He snapped his head in her direction. It was clear that he didn't think she heard him. He sighed and looked down at his hands, beginning to play with his fingers. "You think I'm insane," He mumbled. What was she supposed to say, Yes? She wouldn't think that way if he explained it to her.

   "No," she hesitated to continue, but did it anyway. Go big or go home right? "Maybe you could explain?... you don't have to though, only if you're comfortable."

   "Everything I told you was true," He said sternly. "You wouldn't understand." He scoffed.

   "I want to," She shot back. "I want to help. If you could just let me in-"

   "I can't!" His face softened when she flinched. "It's too dark for you in here." He said, tapping his head twice. "Let's just... talk about you. A safer topic."

   "Sure," She nodded, a little disappointed. "What do you want to know?"

   "Any siblings?"

   "I have a brother, JJ, he's in college, and an older sister, Sadie, she's graduated college." She said.

   Miles nodded and looked up. He hummed while thinking up another question. "What are your parents like?"

   "Uh," She cocked her head slightly, thinking of an answer. "Yeah, they're alright. Pretty easy going. My dad is basically a child in a grown man's body and my mom is... fine with it?" They chuckled.

   Miles stopped laughing and frowned. He looked at her with complete seriousness. "Are you... are you scared? Of me?"

   She didn't expect the question. Was she? Not really. Unless she had a reason to be. "No, I wouldn't say I am. Why? Should I be scared of you?" Is that what he's saying? That I should be scared?

   Miles sighed through his nose. "I don't know." For the first time, he looked vulnerable. After all, he was just a boy. Only sixteen.