We Are Shadows

Chapter 26

Chapter 26

RPOV

"Sorry Pavel" I said reaching down to him on the mat. I forget that Pavel isn't naturally as strong as Dimitri and I.

"It's alright Rose" he panted out. "Don't worry about it. Just give me a minute to get my breath back and I'll be fine."

"I keep forgetting I can't punch full strength when I fight with you" I said, still worried that I had hurt him.

"I said don't worry about it" he said a little clearer. "It's all good practice. It reminds me that I'm not invincible" he added laughing out.

"Has there been any change at all Pavel?" asked Dimitri.

"I don't think so Dimitri" he answered. "I am a little better with reaction times but I think that's just having someone who is closer to my speed than I'm used to but strength wise I feel no change."

"Maybe you just need a little longer" I said.

"Possibly, you two did have months training with each other whereas I've got lax in my 'old age'" he said laughing out.

"Well maybe you will have better luck later in a rematch?" I said to him jokingly.

"You are on, Hathaway" he joked back. "But it will have to wait for now, Abe has a meeting soon that I must attend with him" he added as he got himself off the floor and headed for the Guardian quarters.

"Do you think he will get any better?" Dimitri asked me.

"Who knows? Maybe he just needs a little more time. As he says he hasn't had anyone to spar against that was anywhere near his own strength" I answered.

"You might be right" Dimitri replied. "It's coming up to lunchtime. I'm going to go get a shower. I'll meet you on the terrace in thirty minutes?"

"Sure, you know me and food" I laughed out.

Although I was trying to be positive about Pavel, deep down I knew that what I was saying wasn't true. Dimitri and I saw an instant change in our strengths when we were training together but after three weeks of constant training with Pavel, nothing for him had really changed. Was it that Dimitri and I were naturally stronger or was it something else? I contemplated this as I entered my room, stripped off and made for the shower. This isn't the first time I have thought about this. Over the last few weeks whilst fighting with Pavel, I had noticed it was different than fighting with Dimitri. With Dimitri I feel a power surging through me that I don't feel with Pavel. Maybe it's because I'm not attracted to Pavel and that's what makes it feel different somehow but I would have thought that would make it easier to fight with Pavel as I wouldn't be distracted as much as I am with Dimitri. I suppose I will never really know.

As I let the water wash over me the thought played over and over in my mind. Was it because I had feelings for Dimitri? I know he had feelings for me even though he still chose to deny their existence. I wish I could talk to Dimitri about it but that would mean speaking about things he doesn't want to discuss. He has made that clear on many different occasions and now that he is starting to mellow out again I don't want to rock the boat by opening up a touchy subject. It doesn't help the fact my feelings aren't going away any time soon and it is killing me knowing we came so close that day in the cellar before the fight. That moment seemed like a lifetime ago now but it is seared in my memory and won't let me be. You would have thought that the few months and all of the activity that has gone on would be enough to dislodge the feeling but here we are at the beginning of March and that day is still as vivid as if I was there. The battle pales in comparison to that almost kiss. Arrgh stop torturing yourself Rose. Dimitri has made it clear he doesn't want to acknowledge what happened so let it go.