The Queens Servant

Never Leaves

Your POV
"Your a girl aren't you?"

I smile and remove my hood, "Well that's two out of four."

I see Athos' eyes widen for a second before he goes back into his glare. "What do you want?" Anger spewing put of every word

I roll my eyes at his change in personality "Easy tiger, I want you to take a nap. Heaven knows you are gonna need with how much you drank."

"Liar, why would you hide you gender if you weren't trying to gain something."

Ouch

"Well first off as I stated earlier, I travled here on a horse. By myself. That is quite dangerous for a woman to do, there isn't just threat of being robbed. Second, at first I forgot and just went along with it. Then I decided to watch the reactions I got when you all figured it out." I answer his rhetorical question

"Don't believe you." He states although his shoulders relaxed a small bit

"Well I don't expect you to given your past."

Going back to glaring again, seething with anger "You. Don't. Know. Me."

Sighing I look him in the eye "Well then let me guess since you did try to guess mine."

Looking at him trying to lay out my theory in a cohesive story I state my guess

"She must have worked with you before, since you had the same type reactions when D'artangan asked 'what happened'. And I assume she betrayed you on the 'bad mission'."

Athos was starting to become even more tense as I explained but I wasn't done yet,

"Must have been hard since you loved her, I'm going to guess she left you for an enemy?"

He looked a little startled so I assume I guessed right.

"Yes. How did you guess all that?"

I feel a tear role down my cheek but I don't stop and let it fall,

"Heart ache changes a person, and it also makes it easier to identify those who also went through similar."

Athos eyes softend ever so slightly, "Sorry for my comment earlier."

"No, I should have explained that when I came in." I say

"What happened to you then? If its okay to ask."

I didn't like to dwell on the past, but if it helps him with his grief I would happily share my story.

"My husband died while on a business trip, when they found out who killed him it turned out to be a girl he had been with. Poor girl found him drunk and he started to attack her so she defended herself, she didn't know he was married."

A/N yeesh didn't mean for that to be so depressingly dark.

Shock was written over his entire face. It was often the look people had when I explained what happened, but there was something different about it. Usually others had pity and disgust in their eyes with the shock, not him though.

Concern, concern and understanding.

"And what did you do?"

I gave a weak smile, "Well at first I tried drinking to forget, but it only lasted so long. Then I tried seeing someone else, but I couldn't no matter what happened I still loved him."

"Well why not hate the girl?"

I shook my head,

"I couldn't hate her, she was so innocent, she loved him just as much as I did. She was just a betrayed as I was. I couldn't label her as something she wasn't, she wasn't a homewrwrecker or some girl sleeping with for his money. She was a victim, just like me."

"So what did you do to make the pain go away?"

I looked into his eyes as much as the question sounded like pure curiosity I knew why he was asking.

He needed the answer too.

So I answered truthfully.

"It never left me. It's still there, and it always will as long as I love him. It hurts much less now than it did before, but Athos..."

I put a hand on his shoulder, he tenses up again but quickly relaxes.

"...Healing takes time. They say love changes you, and it does, but losing them changes you even more."

He grunts "It's been a year and it still hurts like it did the day it happened."

"Well I've been at it for seven years, you'll get there."

His eyes widened, "how old are you?"

I mimic his expression but with confusion in place of his shock,

"Um, Twenty six, why?"

He looked down and started chuckling before full on laughing.

I will admit his laugh was adorable.

"So you telling me someone two years younger than me has already married and over come grief while I'm still at square one."

I snicker at his remark

"Well I guess, when you put it that way!"

My snickering turned into laughter. We laugh for awhile before calming down breathing deeply.

"Hah...thanks I needed that." Athos says breaking the silence

"The pleasure is mine, and I'm going to have to correct your statement."

His eyebrow went up in confusion.

"You said you were on square one, but that isn't quite right. From what I see your already past a few squares." I explain getting up and putting my hood back on.

"Well I need to be off, I expected somewhere. Oh! Would mind keeping the fact I'm female a secret for now? I really want to see the look on Portho's face when he finds out." Athos nods

"I actually want to see that to. You said 'two out of four so who else knows?"

"D'artangan realized it when we put our horses in the stable."

"Oh, is that what he was yelling about?"

I looked over to him "You heard that?" He smiles

"Well I heard D'artangan but I couldn't figure out what he was saying." I laugh.

"Yes. That was what he was yelling about."

I turn and open the door,

"Well see you tomorrow Athos."

"Tomorrow?"

"You honestly think he is going to take us beating up his guards lightly?"

He chuckled

"I suppose not."

Making my way down stairs I say my goodbyes, and offers the servant Planchet some money for him rent a room in the nearby in, which he gladly takes.

I grab Charity and ride to the castle.