| It's Always Been You | Reddie Fanfic |

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 Side note - this is my first story, so be patient with me

*after Pennywise's defeat*

Eddie and Richie caught up whilst walking home past the Neibolt house. Eddie heard the rough slapping of Richie's old sneakers on the pavement as he caught up, small bits of blacktop roaring towards Eddie's heels. As he turned around, Richie jumped in front of him, causing his knees to cave and he lurched backward, seeking stability.

"What the fuck, dickwad!" Eddie screeched while picking up the pills that crept out of his pockets. That moment was when he realized how absolutely dirty his clothes were. His mom was going to kill him and he was going to be grounded for life. He got up his breath quickening, but it slowed when he dazed back into Richie's deep brown eyes.

"Crazy shit back there, eh?"

"Killing a clown? No, that's everyday stuff for me." The smaller one retorted, clearly upset. As much as he loved Richie, there could be better team bonding exercises than almost dying in some shitty water that the rest of the city used several years ago after Taco Tuesday. 

"Ok, ok, what's up" Richie looked down at Eddie, finally somewhat serious. The change in tone threw him off, and his ability to focus on Eddie's insecurities and fears quickly revealed what was bothering him. What with the messy hair and drying dirt clothes, bloody hands dripping with the poor boy's innocence? Guilt settled in, even if it wasn't his fault, the lanky boy always felt responsible for keeping Eddie as safe as he possibly could in the time he had with him. 

"Other than my hand is now slit open because I let Bill cut it open with a disgusting, probably germ-infested piece of broken glass, and about to be insanely infected, nothing, really" Eddie frantically rushed his words, realizing that the panic attack wasn't too far gone to come back for round two. "It's going to turn purple, and my mom is going to kill me if she sees it-"

"Eds, calm down, it's not dark out, and you and I can easily hide that" The taller one reassured, softly pressing his fingers behind Eddie's soft neck.

"Ok, how? And don't call me Eds!" Eddie said, looking up into the other's deep brown eyes, slightly calmer. An electric shock shot up and down his spine as he felt the cold, bony fingers that belonged to Richie hold him. There was a moment of peace in that second until he remembered the reality of the situation and the fact that his face felt like there was at least a pound of makeup on his porcelain skin.

"I'll sneak in tonight. My parents won't care, and not to mention notice if I sneak a few things from their medicine closet."

Eddie searched for the possibility of Richie joking, finding nothing. "My mother would hear you, it's too risky. Not tonight."

"When have you ever rejected my sneaking in Eddiebear?" Richie sighed, "If you don't want me to, you don't have to let me, but then your mom will see that cut." Richie knew all too well that Eddie was afraid of his mom knowing anything about his life, not to mention that he let his friend cut open his hand. Blackmailing was his only way to get back into the little one's room again. Boy, did he miss the smell?

Richie closed his eyes, trying to imagine the small, sweet smell of Eddie's room from the last time he was there, which was a few weeks ago. A sugary scent that was overwhelming, but Richie's senses were so broken from smoking that it was perfect. Everything was neat, the way the small boy always kept it. Never was there a spill or crumb on the perfect softwood flooring? The closet doors were always closed, but the inside was clean with everything hung up and folded. Behind a little box were a secret few photos of Richie that the poor boy never got to see, but Eddie always looked at when everyone was sleeping. 

"Fine. But come around 11:30 because she's been going to bed late lately and I just want to be careful." Eddie looked back, noticing the voided gaze that Richie was giving him, "Rich? What're you doing?"

Richie fluttered open his eyes and looked at Eddie, "Oh, nothing. Just thinking." The scent was nearly gone from his memory and the smell of the nearby humid pond sunk back into his nose.

"Did you hear me? 11:30. Through the window, like always."

"Yes, yes, I heard, but I'm starting to feel unwanted by your mom. You'd think after the last time she and I got together, she'd be nicer about my presence." Richie chuckled, knowing Eddie was about to kick him for that.

"God, can you ever be normal?" The small brunette shoved the taller one to the side with his left arm.

"Never around you, Eddiebear," Richie winked, watching Eddie stifle a smile.

"I hate you. Now, I'll see you later." The little one jogged inside his little, one-story home, but not after leaving Richie with a friendly punch in the arm, just because.

Richie walked away, averting his eyes from anything above his feet as he kicked rocks into his house. Why can't I tell him? The curly-haired boy thought to himself. What if he hated me because of it? What if he told everyone? What if he- The thoughts dropped when he heard the Bowers gang from inside a nearby alleyway. Richie ran until he was locked inside his house.

Of course, his parents were away for the week "on business". He knew what that meant. They'd be gone for a few weeks, leaving only a few bucks for groceries and coming back drunk, with the intent to, well, not take care of him. It's not like this isn't normal for him, but it still hurts.

He plopped down on his bed, swiftly applying his headphones to his ears. Freddie Mercury sang out "This thing called love" and Richie once again fell back into his daydreaming thoughts.

His curly brown hair, and perfect honey eyes. God, why can't I stop thinking about him? Aren't I supposed to think this way about Bev, or some shit like that? Isn't she supposed to be attractive to me? I mean, yeah, she's cute, but not in the way Eddie is. Eddie, just his name feels nice in my head. Something clearing about it? STOP! You can't be that. That isn't normal. But what about Eddie? Are these just best friend feelings? Right, that's what these are. Nothing more. Never anything more.

Richie sunk further into his thoughts until he checked the time. 11:20 pm. The tall, brown-haired boy jumped out of bed, and rifled through his parent's medicine closet, finding many interesting things, but only grabbed what he needed. After hopping on his dark bike, Richie made it to Eddie in quick time.

Clink!

Clink!

Eddie looked over from the book he had been reading. 'Diseases and Disaster', the title read. Richie stood just under the sill of the clear glass. The small boy slowly opened the squeaky window, trying to hide his pink cheeks.

The tall one quickly flung through the window onto Eddie's soft, pillowed bed. His cheeks were also a little red, but he quickly cooled down.

"Hey Eds" Richie giggled after sprawling all over the blankets.

"Don't- I hate you," Eddie said with a small smile crawling across his face. "Did you bring stuff?"

"The vibrator is in the bag Eds, but that's for your mom," Richie said with a completely straight face.

"Shut up dickwad!" Eddie looked sort of pissed, in a friendly way, "I'm serious, my hand hurts and I don't want another cast."

"Ok, yeah, it's all in the bag. Let me help though," Richie said with flushed cheeks and a wide smile.

"Whatever, fine, if you have to," Eddie looked away, rubbing his arm, knowing all too well that he wanted Richie to hold his arm and heal his hand.

Richie reached into the large, deep brown backpack to pull out the gauze, Neosporin, and a handful of other supplies. He grabbed Eddie's small, colorful hand with the gentle touch of a mother. One that Eddie nor Richie ever had.

The tall one lightly blotted the hydrogen peroxide on the cut, holding Eddie in his lap while he winced. The little boy felt safe in the lap and arms of the bigger one. He never wanted to move, or breathe, or...

"Eds?" Richie cooed after taping the last of the gauze to Eddie's hand. "Are you awake?"

The taller one felt the soft breathing of the warm boy on his stomach. Eddie moaned quietly as a sign of peaceful sleep. Not another word was said until the sweet "Goodnight, I love you" as Richie drifted off. Eddie never heard a thing, as per usual, and slept like a baby, leaving Richie vaguely heartbroken, but knowingly heartbroken.