𝚕𝚊𝚢 𝚖𝚎 𝚍𝚘𝚠𝚗 // 𝕁𝕁 𝕄𝕒𝕪𝕓𝕒𝕟𝕜

Chapter Ten // Use Me

10. Use Me

•••

"She wouldn't spit on me if I was on fire.
She says she loves me, but I know she's a liar.
The sex is good, but God she's got no desire.
-
She's kind of cold, but yet she's hot on the outside.
Last night got nasty and I'm still kind of tongue tied.
I hate to say it, but she brings out my
sick side."

~Use Me by Hinder

•••

⚠️ Major Trigger Warnings: Mentions of sexual assault/rape, substance abuse, depression, heavy angst, emotional trauma, smut (not super graphic), discussions of rape culture⚠️

**If any of the above warnings bother you, please skip this chapter**

🖤

•••

Valerie finally composed herself enough to leave the confines of Barry's small bathroom. A cold mask of indifference cloaked her face as she made her way down the hall to the living room, gun in hand.

She could hear him moving around and she braced herself for what she was about to do.

What was she about to do?

She wasn't sure yet. A part of her only intended to threaten him, make it clear that if he ever laid hands on her again she would rip his balls off. But another part of her... the less sane part... the damaged part... begged her to put a bullet between his eyes and call it a day.

With a deep, steadying breath, she rounded the corner, raising the gun to take aim at the figure seated on the couch.

"Val?" Rafe questioned nervously, glancing up from the lines of coke he had been snorting. Running his thumbs under his nose, to wipe away the excess powder, he eyed the gun and then her distraught face. "What's going on?"

Valerie kept the gun trained on him for a moment, her hand shaking slightly, as she grit her teeth. Finally, she huffed and lowered it, shoving it into the waistband of her ripped black jeans. She tore her hands through her tangled hair.

"Where's Barry?"

"Not sure." Rafe sat staring at her for what seemed like ages, his hands twitching from the effects of the drugs.

"You.... want a hit?" He finally asked slowly, as if he couldn't think of a single better thing to say.

Val couldn't help the incredulous laugh that escaped her throat, but rather than telling Rafe to go jump off a cliff, she found herself nodding. Plopping down on the couch beside him, she watched numbly as he scraped together a line of powder for her.

He handed her a rolled up bill and, before she raised it to her nose, she paused to inspect it.

"Tell me you are not hitting lines with a Benjamin?" She scoffed, holding up the hundred dollar bill. "How fucking boujie are you?"

"It's all I had on me." Rafe grumbled, rolling his eyes.

"You are such a kook, Dude." She shook her head, leaning forward to inhale the powder. The familiar burning in her nostrils was both comforting and terrifying as she sat back, squeezing her eyes shut and rubbing her nose.

She opened her eyes to realize Rafe was staring at her. "What?"

"What's up with you?" He asked suspiciously, gesturing between the gun tucked in her waistband and the white dusty remnants on the table.