Emma

Chapter 15

Cole walked into his house, a smile plastered on his face. He didn't know why or how, but just the mere thought of her warmed his chest and caused his heart to skip a beat. He sighed as the memory of his night flooded his head.

The feeling of her forehead against his and her soft, delicate hands molded into his hard ones, caused his whole body to slightly shiver.

He held the wrapped present in his hand, clutching it as though in the blink of an eye it would magically disappear. He walked upstairs to his room and sat on his desk.

His smile widened as he finally inspected the present to see that it was some sort of book. He carefully removed the wrapping sheet and his eyes enlarged in a mixture of confusion, surprise, and humor at what was before him.

'TRUE IMAGES' was written in bold pink and under it, in tiny printing, said: ' A Bible for teenage girls.' The Bible seemed fairly old and looked as though it had dog ears on most of the pages. Cole shook his head and opened the first page, this time, he froze as he took in the writing in front of him; 

Dear Emma, This may be your first Bible, but I hope and pray that it is not your last. I may not be able to give you much, but the things I can, are my Love and God's word. As you turn sixteen, may you grow in spirit and in truth. Happy Birthday my sweetheart. I love you to the heavens and back. -Mum

Cole read the short note over and over again, desperately hoping that his eyes were deceiving him. She gave me her first Bible.

It kept ringing in his head over and over again. He had never done anything for her and even if he had, he could never recall it ever being a good thing. And now, here he was, holding her first Bible in his hands.

When he first opened it and saw it was a Bible, the first thing that ran through his head was; over my dead body. I already have stuff to deal with I don't want to have to handle a book that tells me about all the wrong things I've ever done in my life.

But now, now that he had seen that she had sacrificed one of the first things that made her believe what she believed, that just made him feel guilty about not reading it.

Sure he had gone through some scriptures before, none which he liked, but nonetheless. He wanted to see how important this book was that it had transformed her way of life forever.

He flipped through the pages and could spot where she had made various outlines before turning to the back of the Bible and seeing that there was a sticky note stuck behind it with a different handwriting to the one in front of it and quickly recognized it as the one on the note she had left him.

People think that Christians try to change who a person is. I thought that too. Until I realized that they don't try to change who you are, they try to bring out the best in you and transform it to its greatest heights. They try to lead people to the path that destroys all forms of low self-esteem and doubt and fear, to the path that grows and generates confidence and faith... And strength.

Cole sighed. To be honest, it felt like she was writing to him, but he knew she was writing to herself. His memory suddenly flashed back to when she was praying for him. She had called whatsoever 'God ' that she was speaking to, 'Father'

That didn't baffle him much because he knew that they believed their deity was their heavenly father, what baffled him was, that she had called Cole his son. That stunned him.

How can you possibly do the number of things you've done in this life and still be able to be called a son of some heavenly being? If there was really a God out there somewhere, Cole highly doubted that that God would want someone like him as a child, even his own father didn't, talk less of some Holy entity.

This girl really thought that her 'God' could make all his problems disappear, probably because she didn't know just how deep his problems reached. Something was drawing him to open the book and actually see if it says anything more than naming all the sins he has ever committed, and yet, something was yelling at him to push it away.

Influencing him that she was just using him as some kind of lab dummy, planting the doubt deep in his heart that someone as light and pure as her, could never even attempt to look at someone as rotten and dark as him.

He looked at the Bible; it was pink with huge purple butterflies around it, there were pen marks on the cover and doodles of random stuff she had drawn.

He closed his eyes, thinking.

Deep down he knew that just one page, just one sentence, could change his life. But what he was wrestling with, what he didn't know, was whether it would change his life for better, or just add to one of the voices screaming in his head.

He could manage one, he could try and manage two, but the feeling of a third thing subconsciously filling his head with more and more thoughts, just imagining it gave him a headache.

It would be so simple to just pick up the Bible and keep it on a shelf and forget it ever existed, forget that she ever existed. But he didn't want to. And he didn't know why.

He didn't want to read it, but he didn't want to live with wondering what was inside it. He was having an inner battle with himself and he didn't know who he was for or against.

Cole finally opened his eyes and looked at the pink book staring at him. He picked it up, hesitating before opening it. 

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth.