Brother's Loyalty: Endgame

The Cleanup Woman

Seriously? Our lives are at stake, and Gadd sends Luigi to fetch a briefcase?! WTF?!

Calm down, all right? I'm sure the Professor knows what he's doing.

I don't know—he did sell King Boo's portrait, which led to the Dark Moon incident. Sometimes, I think his mind's going. He may be a man of science, but he's an old man of science.

Yeah, I get what you're saying. But we'll just have to wait and see.

Yeah, guess so—

But what we can take away from this is that Luigi's still got the moves!  Taking on ghosts right and left and socking it to Steward to defend Gadd.  And he's doing it shirtless.  Anyone got a problem with that?

Not me.

Not me, either.

I dunno, guys.  Those leggings aren't doing anything for his [bleep].

Okay, first of all, Chad, I got him those leggings for our birthday.  Second of all, nobody ask you to look.

C'mon, guys, I think he looks great.  As far as I'm concerned, that's the MK's [bleep].

...

The fifth floor was in disarray when Luigi arrived, a knocked-over sofa blocking the corridor to his right and two suitcases blocking the corridor to his left. A little trash was strewn on the carpet, as well. Luigi closed his eyes as he remembered fleeing down the hallway toward that laundry chute, King Boo at his tail, his long tongue licking and lapping at him. The image of his bro, his prospective sis-in-law and the three Toads in their artistic prisons. Hellen's evil grin and the King's snarling face. He shouldn't have run, but what else could he do when he didn't have the Poltergust on his back? At least now, he could fight his way up to the top floor, with Professor Gadd guiding him along.

Polterpup nuzzled against his hip, and Luigi dropped to his knees, giving the dog some attention. Unlike the adventures in 2001 and 2013, he now had a faithful ghostly canine companion to provide backup, hints and emotional support. Surely, he couldn't count that out.

The Virtual Boo's ringtone sounded, and Luigi quickly snatched up the goggles and put them on.

"Yello?"

"Hey, Luigi. I just remembered something important that I neglected to mention," said Gadd.

"And what's that?"

"Do you recall the plunger-shooting function on the Poltergust G-00?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I've made a few modifications to it over the past year. It's called—the Suction Shot. It'll work as a weapon for you on your adventures."

"Great!" said Luigi. "I was wondering why it wasn't working earlier."

"Never fear—it's fully operational now. A good rule of thumb regarding the Suction Shot is that you can stick it onto flat and smooth surfaces. And if you suck up the rope, then you can tug on objects and pull off a powerful slam to break them."

"That'll make things easier," mused Luigi.

"You should start shooting it at things right away! Practice makes perfect, after all."

"Okeydokey."

"Just don't forget to get my briefcase."

Luigi rolled his eyes. "I won't."

"Stay safe out there."

"Okeydokey—bye-bye!"

Luigi hung up, pocketed the VB and vacuumed up the trash littering the carpet before turning toward the suitcases blocking his path. He aimed, took a deep breath, and fired off a plunger attached to a knotted rope. The plunger landed squarely in the center of the suitcase, and then Luigi pulled taut on the rope before heaving the suitcase forward with a grunt, smashing it to pieces on the floor and spilling its contents. He did the same to the other suitcase before vacuuming up said contents, which consisted of gold bars.